He was a food hoarder.
He skinned my pet wolf for that hat⌠My poor babyâŚ
2 Likes
I be skinân her pet wolf, but be blaminâ Gornur for it.
Be runninâ now before the silly goat be findin out 
3 Likes
She got first place in the Trial of Style and wouldnât stop bragging about it. Every single day âthey love me, they really love me!!â
Whatever, at least I can cover my toes if I wanted to!
4 Likes
Drinks way too much. Too easy to set the place on fire, turns out Alcohol burns well.
1 Like
Didnât appreciate my dwarven friends singing doggy doggy hole or wind rose.
He really likes peanut butter as a treat.
Plus it is good bait for kobolds
2 Likes
Spent too much gold in the auction house on peanut butter ⌠as a treat for his pets
4 Likes
Tried to take all my gold.
He kept going over to his exâs place to âget his gold back.â After the fifth attempt I cut him loose so he could focus on his âgold retrievalâ efforts.
2 Likes
Was convinced they were a dragon and called a rather crudely built stack of Legos as their oath stone. They would come running into the bedroom yelling about their aspectral powers. After a week of that I donated him to a starving group of primalist refugees who looked really desperate. I almost felt a bit guilty until I stepped Lego. /sigh
3 Likes
It was going smoothly for a while until I discovered they were a Primalist sympathizer. I just couldnât have that.
2 Likes
He never want to pair up like how they do In fire emblem to take on enemy and strength are , bonding
2 Likes
She just had this mad obsession with Fire Emblem. I didnât even understand what she was talking about half the time.
3 Likes
He claimed to be the Warcraft Master.
Hey now⌠what happened on the honeymoon wasnât my fault.
Just, noâŚno.
Threw out all my good dwarven ale and filled my fridge with arc wine. That stuff tastes like dirty feet and electricity. I had to divorce them after that affront.
1 Like
She drank way too much ale. Whenever Iâd ask her to slack off a bit, sheâd slap the beer belly sheâd developed and say âI gotta FUEL this sexy!â and end up passing out. So, she had to go.
2 Likes
When we first met she was a go-with-the-flow kinda Druid but over time she slowly morphed and shape shifted into a square with no right angles. She was too complex for me.
4 Likes
This one says she want simple, I say she want free experimental Druids!
I woke up once wit a laser beam strapped to my head and she was smilin down at me like a maniac wit her pinky up to her mouth! Said we be going to da ocean now and I should turn into a shark.
I dunno why she wants a friggin shark with a friggin laser beam on its head for but it cannot be for no good!
1 Like
Didnât understand that not everyone wants to be inside of the bearâŚkept saying âBut Halsinâ and I just couldnât anymore.
2 Likes