He’s innocent until he’s proven guilty. Why are we assuming the victim is right? Just to be clear, I don’t support either party
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Sus take:
Entire doc was posted to stir up a storm with malicious intent to screw with his job/ lifestyle in a form of a “public execution.”
Actual stance:
I’m waiting to see how the end result is.
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That’s my stance, with me leaning towards “guilty” for now
The correct move to handle an abuser is via a lawyer, not via twitter. Let the court solve it, and after that the abuser will still get his punishment, because the mass media will still report it. but it’s after the court decided that he is guilty. What she is doing currently is not solving the problem. She needs to seek a lawyer and settle it on court.
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“she clearly remembered it differently from I”
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Gaslighting means forcing someone to think the way the person don’t want to. How can «she remembered that wrong» be gaslighting, it doesn’t force her to think the way he wants?
Gaslighting is manipulating someone into questioning their own sanity. I feel like it’s pretty clear how saying “she remembered that wrong” can have that effect.
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But as it was said before, sometimes it is hard to distinguish gaslighting from a different point of view. I treat this as a way to propose his pov, not to silence her one
Those two things aren’t mutually exclusive. You can present a point of view without calling into question the other person’s memory capabilities.
This way almost any argument can be treated as gaslighting, because its purpose is to change one’s mind to resolve an issue. Maybe he worded it kinda bad, but personally I don’t see there anything that sounds like «no you should think the other way»
Why does that sound like a set up to me?
Women have had a long history of manipulating men with sex.
Wikipedia explains it best: “The goal of gaslighting is to gradually undermine the victim’s confidence in their own ability to distinguish truth from falsehood, right from wrong, or reality from delusion, thereby rendering the individual or group pathologically dependent on the gaslighter for their thinking and feelings.”
Why would that even remotely matter?
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Thread should be close after this response.
This matter is not OW related (yes he is a Valorant but was an OWL player), nor belongs to “general” and its something you can google, dont do the work for OP.
So yes, in this case almost everything can be treated as gaslighting. I can prove you wrong once, twice, and more, until you start to think «well, can I be right or I’d better keep silence?», but is that the thing?
Again, maybe as a non-native, I can’t see something in between his words, but for me saying «she may forgot/misunderstood/etc something» is ok, because people can be wrong or think differently about different stuff. And I am not saying that she is wrong, not at all, I don’t know yet
Totally unbiased, genius take. Let me try:
Men have had a long history of abusing and controlling women.
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I take it you don’t have much experience with gaslighting then because no, it can’t.
The phrase “she remembered it wrong” quite literally calls into question her memory capabilities, i.e. calls into question her “sanity”.
It would have been fine if he had, for example, shown even the slightest bit of empathy for having made her feel that way.
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Cry wolf while recording…
How easy would it be to side with her?
You must be projecting because no where have I stated I “side” with her.
What I take issue with is your disgusting logic that women as a whole manipulate men with sex, and that therefore any woman with a claim like this is suspect.
If that’s the logic you want to run with than it’s just as logical if not more so to point out that men as a whole have been abusive and controlling of women for basically forever. So then, logically, his denial should be suspect at least as much.
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The phrase “she remembered it wrong” quite literally calls into question her memory capabilities, i.e. calls into question her “sanity”.
Don’t you think that it’s her problem? Like I said, I wouldn’t care if you say that about me, and I am not alone at this point, there was someone with the same idea
I had a girlfriend some time ago, and after our experience I know, what gaslighting may be, and why people treat it in a wrong way
That’s literally what gaslighting is intended to make her think. That she’s crazy and remembering everything wrong, that she’s making it all up and hurting him, that she’s really the one to blame here.
I don’t know how I can be more clear about this so I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree.
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