“Literally”
free from exaggeration or distortion
Every decade, or so, has their 4-syllable vogue word people toss out as an emphatic expression, but ‘literally’ is ‘literally’ inadequate to use for that as you are ‘literally’ not being literal in your literacy. Clearly we can’t trust the veracity of such claims!
Try using:
actually, totally, virtually, officially, practically, seriously absolutely, positively – those used to be paired together, so image the possibilities of other combinations! You could even be a trend-setter by upping your game and increasing the amount of syllables used for your emphasis:
deliberately, unequivocally, indubitably – that one’s a +1 for blizzard reference, thanks Anub’arak 
What you’re trying to convey are comparative statements, but without any provided comparison, the statements lack value and instead people learn to just exaggerate all the more, which is just overcompensation. Overcompensating with excessive emphasize – and effectively unreliable vocabulary – indicates a lack of experience and observation. Such posts don’t convey that something is super bad, but rather that you apparently lack problem-solving skills, imagination, and information.
I have worse experiences than your anecdotes, and I can imagine significantly more ‘insane’ punishments. The concern expressed isn’t about actual ‘hell’, but being placated. Children can cry that something is the ‘worst [insert] ever!’ but a piece of candy, or 5 minutes of CoD – or whatever phone game – turns that around: easy come, easy go. They don’t know any better, so they just try to exaggerate as much as they can because they don’t notice that anyone else knows better either. They then don’t learn to deal with their problems, or how to give them value (too offset unhappy moments) and they just complain more and more and more and more and more.
The objects of complaint here have ‘reasons’ for their implementation, so there’s also consequences for those things being removed:
- if draft dodging didn’t lead to ranked removal, then people could perpetually leave lobbies and turn 45 minute queues into ad infinitum. (You could wait even longer.)
- if leaver queues didn’t require wins, then people would leave those too.
- if leavers were isolated from the rest of the games, then trolls could be more capable of ruining standard play, and not isolated play (which already receives a lot of complaints on that end)
- if punishments were given out sooner (to isolate leavers) then that also weaponizes troll/bots into reporting people more to get ‘legit’ players banned.
These aren’t just theoretical claims, there are games that lack some of these ‘checks’, and they have “worse” experiences that people describe on these forums. The point of this post isn’t to – completely – disregard your gripes or “defend blizzard” put to point out how people can make things better on their end.
Bad imitation leads to bad habits, so just as using ‘literally’ as am emphatic crutch for poor communication could be offset by expanding ones lexicon, so too can game experiences. 45 ranked lobbies can get faster games with chat/discord lobbies for custom games, or similarly, getting parties offsets the ai filling leaver games.
A mild inconvenience isn’t “literally the worst hell ever,” it just indicates someone turned their brain off and expects anyone else to function for them instead. And, unfortunately, life outside of this game isn’t kind to that sort of conduct, so… that sort of stuff tends to just get worse, and worse and worse if people don’t learn how to learn to learn better 
)