World of Warcraft Patch 9.0.5.0.5

[Anufenrir-moon-guard (Anufenrir)]

@Kaivax

New Dungeon: A Fungus

Brave the depths of the fungal network beneath Ardenweald with a group of 5-10 players, where 1-2 of members of your group are accosters randomly selected to try to kill you! Communication is key when you don’t know who to trust, and everyone sounds like they’re lying at all times, especially when they don’t speak up. Who’s the accoster? Don’t kick the wrong person!

Ok but for real this would be fun.

[Vhx-black-dragonflight]

A Fungus needs to be the S2 seasonal affix.

[Shadowthorn-cenarius]

@Kaivax

Venthyr shamans are now provided with a unique therapeutic questline to help them deal with the cognitive dissonance of their Covenant choice.

Thanks you! I’ve been really conflicted, at least we have good tea.

[Vedimh-zuljin]

@Kaivax

Curse of Ambience: The target repeatedly demands that you listen to something that they insist is “music” but it’s just an hour of whale sounds at 5% speed.

Jesus Christ my sides

[Sügardáddý-tichondrius]

I wonder how long it took them to come up with this april fools joke, is this the main reason Chains of domination is being delayed till august?

[Gargelok-frostmourne]

Yeah, a community manager is delaying 9.1 to write april fools posts. Bloody muppet.

[Sügardáddý-tichondrius]

april fools

[Vixie-burning-blade (Vixie)]

Thank you for the yearly smirks

@Kaivax

But what is loot, if not RNG persevering?

and some actual chuckles. <3

[Hími-wyrmrest-accord]

@Kaivax

After years of feedback on this, at last, Warlocks can pet their felhunter and tell him he’s the goodest boi. 13/10.

OKAY BUT LISTEN.
I DO THIS.
My Felhunter IS the goodest boi, but not as good as Rommy he is the goodest felhunter.

@Kaivax

• Curse of Dankness: The target emits an awkward, musty smell, and becomes slightly damp. Moist, even.
• Curse of Curse of Dankness: Forces the target to read the previous patch note a second time.

I feel personally attacked by these but I also can’t stop laughing at them, WHO DID THIS.

[Sabbia-moonrunner (Sabbia)]

@Kaivax

Rogue

• The Pick Lock ability will now correctly choose the nearest appropriate Warlock.
• Sub Rogues now have a cute little underwater boat that perfectly fits the sub lifestlye.
• Loaded Dice can now be properly unloaded for safe storage.
• Combat Potency has been renamed Outlaw Potency. We’re not sure how we missed this one.
• Restless Blades have been properly hydrating and exercising and are really starting to get their sleep schedule back on track.
• Fixed a bug that caused Relentless Strikes to sometimes inadvertently Relent.

[Xandrendis-dathremar]

Most unfunny April Fools patch notes. Ever.

[Raeodor-bloodhoof]

Now if only this creative energy was channeled into the game.

[Captplanet-chogall]

Eh, I’ve seen better jokes. Miss the year of “barrage now pulls enemies from other instances”

[Xandrendis-dathremar]

I miss the year of the “Wisp is now a playable race!” And “check out our new Starcraft restaurant!”

[Raeodor-bloodhoof]

Yes it is.

[Slimesmile-fizzcrank]

@Kaivax

Rake no longer smacks you in the face when you step on it.

Ok this one got me.

[Alexizonfire-area-52]

@Kaivax

Thunder Clap no longer requires the Warrior to be dummy thicc.

This actually got me.
Good job on some of these.

[Arithawn-area-52]

Nice very nice
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/800596040830418967/827114267986755604/Screenshot_20210401-043222_Samsung_Internet.jpg

[Lyánna-uldum (Lyánna)]

@Kaivax

New talent: The Winter Winds. We still don’t know what it’s about yet, but the guy who’s been creating this talent for almost ten years says you have our formal written permission to imprison him on an island if it’s not done by next summer.

Haaaaaaaaa!

Yeah, we’re never getting them. Ever.
~https://collider.com/george-rr-martin-hbo-deal-details/

@Kaivax

Druid

• Rake no longer smacks you in the face when you step on it.
• Innervate has been innovated on, and it now emanates an intimate condensate to mitigate the desolate desiccant before you dehydrate. 2 charges.
• New returning talent: Encroaching Vines. We really thought we completely removed this last autumn, but it keeps coming back on that one sunny side of the wall.

Hunter

• Combining Cobra Shot with the Spitting Cobra and Killer Cobra talents now motivates you to re-open a controversial karate dojo in the San Fernando Valley.
• Born to Be Wild now makes you fire all of your guns at once and explode into space.

I. Am. Cryin. And can’t breathe!

[Crashinghoof-mankrik]

Ok I just lost it here

Hunter

• Combining Cobra Shot with the Spitting Cobra and Killer Cobra talents now motivates you to re-open a controversial karate dojo in the San Fernando Valley.