The Best Replacement For Ursoc

Lore Story Forum
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A big ant-eater. Hear me out.

Firstly isn’t it odd Azeroth has none?

Like we have an objectively stranger looking animal on Earth, than anything that appears in Azeroth or adjacent worlds. And we can’t even blame a wizard for that. We should fix that.

There are some pangolins in the Wandering Isle, but that’s about all I can find.

So my suggestion is we either retcon anteaters as already exisiting or make their existence a consequence of contact with Ardenweald.

But why? What would anteaters add to Warcraft?

I’ll tell you.

Ant-Eater Wild God.

His name will be Slorpum the Long, because of their mouths you see, and he will be arch rivals with Krag’Wa the Huge.

The holy wars raged in their name will determine the fate of all the bugs of Azeroth. I mean, fate’s actually pretty much decided it’s just which big tongue gets to munch them, really.

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We already have Ursol, he can be a replacement. I do think having an Anteater Wild God would be neat though. What’s weirder is that Azeroth doesn’t have ducks.

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Oh my God. You’re right.

Quackers The Buoyant when?

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There’s rubber ducky fishing bobbers, so their must be ducks SOMEWHERE.

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Ursoc also has two kids hanging out up in Northrend that could be brought into relevence.

It always annoyed me that they’re called pangolins, but are armadillos. I know WoW’s not exactly on the cutting edge of biology, but pangolins aren’t even xenarthrans, like anteaters and armadillos.

There’s all kinds of stuff in the Emerald Dream that I can’t share with the general public.

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Just picture it. He is a King Kong sized anteater who only communicates in thrlpsssthrlp noises.

But gives the greatest wisdom for those who can understand him. Maybe Blizz could stealth hire like Patrick Stewart and when you finally embrace the pssrpluplup it’s just that voice giving you wisened counsel on your quest.

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Thaaaat… sounds like an Old God. I know where this is going.

gears up for Emerald Nightmare 2: Toungetacle Edition

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Oh please Shath’Yar is more;

Nid wyf yn gwybod sut i siarad Cymraeg ac rwy’n defnyddio algorithm cyfieithu gwael

Whereas Slorpum the Long, Mighty Is He, will speak in slurping noises.

If anything He’d be the most terrifying enemy the ahn’qiraj had ever faced. Devouring entire hives with His Holy Slurp.

The Jailor himself would be given pause by His power, for He will T Pose to establish dominance.

Behold
https://youtu.be/Cg2N58M-Bmc

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Truly all mortal should fear such a mighty being, for what will Slorpum do once it has devoured all bugs on Azeroth?

He will come for us. All of us.

Who will save us then?

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Ah you see that’s when we reveal Buzzelbub, Prince of Honey and Master of Stings. And you see he was the real threat the whole time.

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We’re not supposed to share stuff from the Emerald Dream? :grimacing: Oh … well then … {Shuffles over to hide Goose} “HONK.” SHH, I mean uh nothing to see here. >_>

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There’s a good reason there’s no ant-eaters on Azeroth.

You seen any ants on Azeroth? Didn’t think so. They’d starve to death.

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I must have completely forgotten about this, they must become relevant when we get a furbolg allied race.

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Yes. We had several meetings about it after someone “accidentally” released Corgis into Azeroth.

The devs, too, apparently. But they’re still there. Waiting.
https://wow.gamepedia.com/Orsonn
https://wow.gamepedia.com/Kodian
They need a model touch up, first, though.

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… >_> {Sweats intensely & hides slightly-bent Corgi-key} “M-maybe the Corgis were just lonely for some pats and one thing led to another. I’m sure the same could happen with the fabled Goose that mysteriously escaped the Emerald Nightmare.”

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A… Goose? No. No. NO!

Azeroth has faced many horrors. But that… thing…

https://youtu.be/eEeKOPANEGU

It will succeed where the Legion failed.

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Untitled wild god form

Edit: It runs off with a sha bell in its mouth and honks with it everywhere

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Perry the Platypus

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Given that Mylune personally took over the Corgi Experiment (and promptly renamed it Project Cuddle-Wuddle the Corgi-Worgis), I’m inclined to doubt that.

Speaking of that on a public forum constitutes a Class Five Breach. Merithra would like to speak to you.

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not every wild god must be replaced, in my eyes, his “dying” would be not as impactfull, as it should.