3rd time posting is the charm, (kept trying to post it under an account I need to delete) I’m clearly new to forums lol anyways on with the post.
So I just got my girlfriend into playing wow and I’ve been showing her the ropes. she’s been getting the hang of things and has been doing pretty well especially considering it’s her first MMO.
long story short she’s been having a lot of fun and has gotten really hype about dragon flight and the evokers so FFW to today when we were able to make our first evokers together. After we got the whole intro done I queued us for the new dungeon(so I thought) turns out I put us in a random normal queue. no big deal I thought it’s just normal sanguine depths surely this can be a learning experience for her. nope wound up being her first toxic encounter.
we weren’t doing terrible all things considered, I was awkwardly getting used to my new abilities but still only pulling a couple hundred DPS away from the guy on top and she was just a couple under me. nothing that would kill a normal dungeon. The tank as we got to the first boss votes to kick my girlfriend reason stating afk. I decline and say I see no reason to kick. to which he responds that we both need to leave, that how can I be a dragon and be so bad. that I should go and solo the boss. I asked why do we need to leave? she’s new and I’m trying to show her the ropes, how else can we learn without actively playing content. He sent another vote which some how went through and she got kicked.
why should new players be punished for not having developed the skills we’ve all gathered over playing for however many years? especially someone new to MMOs in general. Of course someone new to the game isn’t going to be amazing none of us were amazing when we first started. I just don’t get it, now if it were heroic or mythic yeah I’d understand getting frustrated or upset but still better communication would be nice. instead of just nope get out you’re bad. maybe help guide people before having them leave, if we help new people learn it makes the community as a whole better.
I’m personally terrified of tanking for just this reason, I’ve been playing for years and have never tanked an instance once because I see how they get treated. god knows how I’d be treated not knowing how to tank well. How did things get so bad? What can we do to change this? Is there anything Blizzard could do to help things not be as bad?
I don’t expect to hear much from this, this is my first post on here. I’m not much of a forum guy but I don’t know I felt like trying to get involved in the community a little more for once. Maybe speak for those casuals players out there who just like to have fun, or anyone who may be new and looking to learn without the fear of being kicked out of their group after waiting however long in queue just because they don’t pull top DPS or don’t know the dungeons as well as most of us. It’s just ridiculous to me, I don’t understand why people have to try hard on every aspect of the game.
If anyone does take the time to read this, firstly I appreciate your time. Secondly I would love to hear any feedback or anything on this matter so long as we can keep things rational. Thanks again for your time and I hope everyone is enjoying pre-patch and the road to Dragon Flight.
Your GF’s experience is like that of a learner driver who is driving at the speed limit and gets honked at and yelled at by a speeding driver upset that she isn’t speeding too or didn’t pull over to let their car through. Unfortunately when you venture out on the roads you have to deal with good drivers and toxic ones. It’s the same with any MMO. People complain about toxicity all the time and rightly so but toxic people exist in our world and anytime you engage in events that bring people together, whether it be online or offline, you run the risk of encountering them.
Thankfully, online we have tools to help us deal with such people that we don’t have offline - we can put them on ignore and keep playing, we can leave group and find another one and we can report them. In the real world we don’t have that luxury. Accepting this can happen and understanding that their behavior is not a reflection of anything you or your GF did and understanding what tools you have to address it is the best way to quickly deal with it and move on from it, so a bad encounter with a toxic person doesn’t ruin your whole day or week.
In the real world, it’s much better! You can slash their tires, follow them to find out where they work and stalk that place online and get them fired, catfish them and break up their relationships (which let’s be honest, are already on the verge), etc etc
Couldn’t read it all tbh. I need a condensed format. I’m reading six college books currently, the last thing i am tryina do is read an essay (I also do that too.)
After skimming, you’re upset you got kicked because tank said youse is bad. okay, queue up again. What do you want us to do? Lecture people on being polite? Most of these adults are in their 30’s and 40’s. Do you think random strangers lecturing them is going to change them after hearing it for at least 95% of their life?
I appreciate the well thought out reply. Comparing it to a new driver is honestly a great example you’re absolutely correct there.
Neither of us were upset about it though, personally it effected me more than her XD she didnt care at all lol. But we both did a quick report and carried on our night. I just wanted to do a quick post to vent cause it was kind of eating away in the back of my mind.
I know not everyone is like that and i honestly dont encounter them often. I have noticed however it is definitely becoming more common for people to act that way. I once got booted from a dungeon finder heroic back in BFA because i got a piece of loot drop for me that id been trying to get for awhile. Someone demanded i give them the drop but i had already equiped the item. So i got the boot.
Ive been thinking maybe by getting involved a little bit in the community i might find some chill people to group up with. Hopefully that works out.
“When you see anyone weeping in grief because his son has gone abroad, or is
dead, or because he has suffered in his affairs, be careful that the appearance
may not misdirect you.
Instead, distinguish within your own mind, and be prepared to say, “It’s not the
accident that distresses this person., because it doesn’t distress another person;
it is the judgment which he makes about it.” As far as words go, however, don’t
reduce yourself to his level, and certainly do not moan with him. Do not moan
inwardly either.” — Epictetus.
Bad things happens because bad ppl do bad things and good ppl just allow it to happen .
You are very much part of the problem if this is your attitude.
Id like to throw in here that in no way was i actually upset by this encounter. Just mildly annoyed. I totally get these things happen. As the title says i just wanted to vent a tad cause you gotta admit its kinda wild how some people act sometimes.
Not at all. I don’t think enabling a behavior and reiterating the issue is going to be productive.
You literally can’t change people, they have to make the decision to change. If you wish to change at least a million peoples’ behavior, or heck even 200,000 be my guest.
The only thing the OP can control is their emotions and how they act. Everything else is a snipe hunt of wishful thinking. Most of those individuals would require more effort, and a good majority won’t listen.
