I agree in sentiment, I disagree on the premise that sometimes it is about how you choose to disagree. Per my initial idea, when do we consider it Bad if someone is disagreeable. Furthermore, disagreeing does not mean the same thing as being disagreeable.
I believe the “two camps” is the easiest way to describe polarization. The fact of the matter is that nothing is ever black and white, and taking 2 opposing sides is almost ludicrous.
I believe this is where a lot of us get into trouble raises hand. I often fall into the trap of needing to debate, and choose to micro-analyze my “opponent” line by line. My goal is to tear apart his argument, erode his credibility, or ultimately clown him until he quits or I get the last word. All about winning.
In this thread I am seeing that we CAN have a reasonable discussion, without it becoming a debate. The sharing of knowledge, and the ensuing ability to understand where people are coming from is winning IMO.
I have believed for a long time that you should be more concerned with WHO you are than WHAT you are.
except this class only is viable if you ignore history. everything laid at one races feet also falls at every other races feet the further you go back in history. asian african native american mongolian south american middle eastern you name it its been there done that…
I do believe that individuals have the right to their opinions and that we should accept the non threatening ones and move on, so yes, we do need thicker skin. Not everything is meant offensively, sometimes the most surprising of turnabout is actually comical. We shouldn’t hold ourselves in such high regard and think we are undeserving of criticism either.
Depends on where you were raised. I’m from the South. “Yes, Mam” and “No, Sir” are expected of children in many regions. That habit follows to adulthood.
Or even the North, depending on family. I am old now and still reflexively say “yes sir, no sir”. If I don’t know someone’s name that is simply how I was taught to address a stranger, or a person in a position of authority.
In the home, it was less formal, but I was still expected to use “yes mom, no mom” and manners. Some sort of lazy “yah” to a direct and important question would have gotten me backhanded.
I still treat people politely and use manners. Please, thank you, and you’re welcome always make life better. So do things like “excuse me” and “I’m sorry”, when inconveniencing someone.
Generally speaking though, I don’t expect others to address me as “ma’am”. I just would hope that they are kind and polite. Most of the kids here call me “Miss [first name]”, and that is how all the elders are addressed. I use the same when addressing the ladies who are much older than me too.
If someone walked up to me being rude and swearing I would just tell them to go away.
Apparently, you can’t call people retarded or gay anymore.
Which isn’t really bad behavior, but it is considered it now.
You just can’t do it.
When I make new friends, I can’t use words like that towards other people on the off chance that my new friend takes offense by it.
So many words I used to be able to freely use and not receive an overreaction from everyone.
It sucks, Because this one time I called this dermatologist with caked on makeup (literally had obvious layers and layers of makeup on, more than a clown) who said I had genetic acne that would never really go away after she walked past me and sat down and didn’t even look at the few blemishes on my face, and when I repeated back to her what she was trying to tell me and had her confirm it, I then proceeded to call her a retard. She got mad, threatened me by saying she was going to report me to my doctor as if he’d get me in trouble, when in reality when he heard about what I said and what I saw on her face, he was trying desperately to hold in laughter and covering his mouth with his head lowered because he wanted to remain professional and proceeded to apologize to me multiple times for sending me to her in the first place.
In today’s world I’d lose my doctor’s respect, get a lecture, and a strike on losing my membership to that hospital, get it put on my record, and probably get talked crap about behind my back by doctors for eternity. Which would really blow.
On WoW those kinds of words can get you banned. Which sucks, but not as much as it would suck if I decided to give my brutal honest opinion to a doctor who is obviously stupid and in need of a reality check.
That’s an under statement. When people hijacked something meant for BLM and turned it into a movement with the soul purpose of complaining for the sake of complaining. I would say we passed hyper sensitive and gone straight to plaid.
Yeah… you were really really rude and there has never been a time where calling your dermatologist (or anyone else you are seeing professionally) a “retard” was ok. In addition, the amount of makeup someone wears, or does not wear, has on bearing on their intelligence.
If you want to joke with a friend and call them something, maybe you can get away with that. Calling a doctor a retard and expecting anything other than a swift termination of the patient relationship is just… unrealistic.
She didn’t do her job, didn’t know my history, obviously had a problem with what I’d be willing to bet was genetic uncurable acne causing her to wear obscene amounts of makeup, (which is why I mention the makeup in the first place, not to be rude about her wearing the makeup in the first place), and then going ahead and diagnosing me with something I didn’t and couldn’t possibly have. It looked like she was taking out her own issues on me and giving me the same or similar fate she was unfortunate enough to have received.
If I hadn’t in some way spoken up for myself and at the time I called her a retard I was 16, being 26 I’d handle it differently and stand up for myself respectfully. Had I accepted that diagnosis, it would have gone on a list of my medical problems, and I’d be getting treatment for something I didn’t have, after being mistreated by a medical professional. It could have been a rather big issue.
She didn’t do her job, she was rude, she refused to look at my skin and discuss the reason I was there in the first place because she knew I had genetic acne, with my dad sitting in the same room, baffled as to how she came to this conclusion because no one in my family has had acne, the treatment for it would never clear it, and that was all she was willing to say to me and not do her job. She didn’t deserve to be treated with the respect and dignity one usually passively gives to a medical professional.
You don’t have to call them a retard, I am aware, but my point was that at the time that I decided to do that, my doctor didn’t feel like he had to put his serious “you can’t talk like that to our doctors” mode on, and found it funny. Because at the time, that word wasn’t taken as seriously as it is now. But you still can’t just let a medical professional mistreat you and give you a false diagnosis because you don’t want to disrespect them. You can be nice about it and refuse the diagnosis and get a new referral. Or you can be rude to them when they decided to be rude to you and discredit the level of impact their role on your record can have if it isn’t removed by someone like your regular doctor. Both you can do without calling them retarded. But still, it’s definitely not okay for her to do what she did.
Also, my point, if I were to call a doctor a retard today, I’d get huge backlash and no support, but back when I was 16, it wasn’t any more serious than if I called her stupid or dumb which she did deserve because she definitely took me for an idiot and my regualr doctor would say to not keep that type of behavior up (by calling someone stupid) but would be open to my reasoning as to why I said such a thing.
It used to be okay to do what I did, but not anymore. It used to be okay to do, in general, out of a professional environment without people getting all hot and bothered over it. Which is something that has changed and is now considered bad behavior in today’s society.
