Ion is at your door

Candee-azuresong · June 23, 2021, 4:54am

I break out the spandex and the whip.

anon70642062 · June 23, 2021, 4:55am

That sounds like a evil plot about to happen?

Sabbia-moonrunner · June 23, 2021, 4:55am

“What the? Why is there an attorney at my do–”

Thinks

“Hey babe, I’m sorry about all the dad jokes, we can totally talk this over!”

anon81348685 · June 23, 2021, 5:00am

Evil?

No, I’m just hungry.

Hunterone-aegwynn · June 23, 2021, 5:11am

I’d probably stare at him surprised he’s at my door. I haven’t run a single Mythic this patch nor a single raid…

Beaupeep-draka · June 23, 2021, 5:16am

Tell him that Enhance still needs adjustment and berate him for playing a Shaman but not paying attention to ALL the specs.

Ody-nazjatar · June 23, 2021, 5:45am

I’d make him mow my lawn in ten minutes.

Then again, in nine minutes.

Then again, in eight minutes, with the sprinklers on.

Then again, in seven minutes, with the sprinklers on, and the dog chasing him.

Then again, in six minutes, with dog chasing him, and the annoying neighbour offering tips.

Then again in five minutes, with the sprinklers on, the annoying neighbour offering tips, and rusty nails all over the lawn.

I will then reward him his hard work with a crappier lawnmower.

And he’ll say: that totally wasn’t wor-…….oh.

Daddydwarfy-stormrage · June 23, 2021, 5:57am

I’d ask him what went wrong

Cleaveland-blackwater-raiders · June 23, 2021, 6:13am

Do what anyone else would, and kiss him romantically while staring into his romantic eyes, as I bend over on my knees asking for Hunter buffs.

anon81348685 · June 23, 2021, 6:19am

I remove the electric charge from the ion changing it to a mere atom.

Soviet-area-52 · June 23, 2021, 6:31am

There’s a special place in Revendreth for people like Ion. I would send him to Revendreth.

Evelynn-khadgar · June 23, 2021, 6:41am

Say Hello and ask what brings him to my door. Maybe make a joke about having him fix a speeding ticket for me, like I would to any lawyer.

Grievus-nagrand · June 23, 2021, 7:51am

This is the best ever

Nalin-nesingwary · June 23, 2021, 8:08am

Surprise. This is not Candid Camera.

Erolyssa-wyrmrest-accord · June 23, 2021, 8:23am

Probably not recognize him and ask him what he’s selling. Then if I figure it out or he tells me I’d be honest and tell him he could be a great raid or encounter lead but he’s a very bad overall lead and he’s killing the game I love and that a great person recognizes their weaknesses and takes the role best for them even if it isn’t the one with the most prestige or dollars attached.

Then I’d feed him some of the world’s hottest ramen noodles (with wow-wow sauce on top, yes that’s a reference to something fictional) and watch his face turn red and all else that follows because I know he’s an elitist jerk and not going to pay heed to a word I said so might as well watch him run around like a cartoon character trying to put out the fire in his mouth from that level of heat.

Fairlight-emerald-dream · June 23, 2021, 8:28am

This needs a classic laugh track to it. It’s too wholesome not to!

I love a good science pun

Deathinacan-shuhalo · June 23, 2021, 9:16am

Call the cops

Wraithheart-wyrmrest-accord · June 23, 2021, 9:20am

I’d probably wonder for a moment why he’s working for Doordash but would then just shrug and take my food bidding him to have a nice day.

Erodon-nemesis · June 23, 2021, 9:34am

NO SIR, WE DON’T HAVE ANY BORROWED POWER HERE

(SLAMS DOOR)

ffs 3rd time just this week

Pepino-frostmourne · June 23, 2021, 10:11am

I somehow feel from the forums, if he showed up to many of these peoples doors, I’m sure their be a missing person called in the next day….