As Tupac once said, pour out a little liquor for your homies. All my friends went to Wrath. They are dead to me.
Except for the most handsome RDruid NA… You know who you are. You’ll always have a special place in my heart. Man, you can slap Stellas and Italian food like no one else. I wish you nothing but success in filling out your bingo cards this weekend, my little bumblebee. Dang. I got off track. Back to the content.
In all seriousness, I’m looking for some damn Qs with people that can understand that a close to two decade old video game is trash. You think SL damage is high and PvP is busted? A few things to consider from an old man that’s actually played the XPac:
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You will not enjoy bolt lock / ele sham ripping your face off if they connect two spells at the same time; and
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You will not enjoy warriors bladestorming your entire team down in a purple tornado.
Your boy Garlic just wants that “ugly” drake that no one cares about until that 2-week notice comes in. The catch is, Qs are scarce, and the Qs I can get are KFC Qs with Walrus. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll never say no to running a 20 piece bucket w/ a side of popcorn chicken. The only problem is that Ret/War/RDruid loves the Colonel’s recipe more than I ever will.
How can ever I compete with necro fury wars and rets running down my hunter?
I hear the same damn thing every game we Q into these apes from Walrus: “These guys are after my 11 herbs and spices. They won’t get them today”. Oh but they do… Every. Damn. Time. It doesn’t matter how many spears I hit, intervenes I actually put on the right target, or triple fears I can bomb, those hungry plate boys are coming for that hunter gravy and I can’t stop em.
In all honesty, I can’t put all the blame on him for playing hunter. We tend to Q with any orphaned disc priest that is available. While we are on that topic, can some of you disc priests start playing real healing classes? What fun is in getting damped by every opponent that didn’t make your mistake on the class selection screen or getting run down by 2 melee?
“I’m oom”.
“I got gripped / ROPed out of my dome”
“I got kicked twice”
“I can’t believe they killed through PS”
“Disc priests are actually really tanky into double melee” - Said some clothie dead on the ground after getting 3x stunned into a strang.
Man figure it out. You get an intervene every 30 secs like everyone else.
Anyways, rant over. Please find updated resume below.
Fully Geared Characters Available for Qs
2 Warriors - Roughly the same CR (2100-2200) - One is reserved for Walrus because we go way back
1 Outlaw Rogue - I admit I’m terrible at this class and feel like scum for playing it but I can probably outperform my warrior on this thing - Seriously. Who thought 7 sec kidney, 1.5 min blind and gouge are healthy for the game? I feel like the main character in this game. The urge to whisper someone saying “Get good” because I sapped them off a kidney is slowly overcoming me.
Skills and Abilities
-Bilingual: Fluent in English and French
-Highly efficient with Microsoft Excel: Still a freak in the spreadsheets
-Ability to multitask
-Got a killer up inside me; can’t talk to my mother so I talk to my diary
-Organized
-Look fantastic in smoking jackets / house coats
-All-star communicator
Previous Experience
WoW Cataclysm Real Duelist - 2500 Arena XP
-Have a PHD in PHD
-Showed success through the Lock/Shamman meta
SL S2 - Fake Glad
-Ran kitty cleave to glad earlier in the season before it was cool (with a Necro feral)
-Hit 2600 as double arms warrior + kyrain resto druid (massive accomplishment)
-Hit 2600 as KFC - Huge shout out to the Colonel for fried chicken
-Got 2700 achieve running ret / war like everyone else
SL S2 Almost Hero of the Alliance
-Was in hero range but the boys hit me up to Q so I did; immediately lost 2 games and tanked out of it because I’m 2 cool 4 hero
SL S3 - Red Drake Holder
-Ran TSG to 2600 to bully Demo lock players
-Made a DH to play hero cleave and bully Demo lock players on an alt
-Finished glad wins while body was processing chili dogs
SL S4 - First Week Duelist
-Ran MM KFC to 2400 MMR because I love pain
-Top 10 arms warrior in 2s and 3s up to week 2
-Fully geared 2 wars in one week like a complete degenerate
Plz send Btags. Even if you’re a disc priest, I’ll still love you.
xoxo - GarlicGirl