How to swallow properly

Greetings my cute pandas, we forsaken love eating our corpses, but I have a metal jaw and during my feast, the meat can get stuck in it and i have to shove my hand in my mouth to get that tasty food out. It’s quite annoying and not really polite at the dinner table with your friends.

To solve this problem, i was going to try to swallow my food whole instead of chewing it. Sadly my throat can’t handle that much meat without choking myself 8( and so i wonder how can a undead with a handicap mouth like myself can swallow his food properly without having to put my meat in the blender.

Thanks and have a good day.

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Just cut a hole in your gut and stuff it in. Few stitches after and yer good to go.

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I wasn’t sure what to expect when I saw the thread title.

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Do you even need to eat?

Seriously

10 characters

‘reads title’
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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Just eat cookies my silly Fleb! They are small enough to eat whole.

:cookie:

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I use coffee enemas and I can eat continuously

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You just need to read the poster and you know what to expect.

I seriously felt this thread was going to go way more south than it did so far…

I don’t have advice for chewing, Fleb. Trolls don’t chew. We rip and swallow food whole… Like a bird lol.

BUT you should get one of these! They clean your hand when you stick it in their water. Just do it with your face! I’m sure it will work out.

And you can make a new friend.
:lobster:

To be honest though, I thought it would similar to this

Don’t eat people. Have a protein smoothie or go vegan. Both are good for you. :slight_smile:

As an Undead, I don’t think he has to worry about what’s good for him. It’s more the taste that matters :slight_smile: .

I thought about going vegan, but then I’d be required to tell everyone I was vegan. And thats just…so much work.

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Can they actually taste food? :open_mouth:

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Hmm, good question.

Lord Fleb, can you taste your food?

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But i will have to stitches myself at each 3-4 hours 8(

You naughty beardy boi.

Yes, i need my nutriment!

Cookies are amazing cute timbit, but i need my meat!

Ah a true fan!

The day is still young my friend.

What a great idea!

i wish i could put food in me like them ghost 8(

I get my vegan meal from night elves cute stuff.

Why of course and you look quite delicious to taste my dear 8)

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It is good to see you looking like yourself Fleb…but does this mean the other story is over?

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