But I have a Lightning Blast 3000 here with your name on it!
Come closer and let me show you how it works.
takes aim
Looks at the heavily over engineered device and shrugs. āDonāt you have better things to do with that? Like, I donāt know, help your king or something?ā Mekgrim letās out a hearty chuckle and precedes to return to his desk to come up with new lucrative enterprises.
8.2.5. is coming VERY soon! You know what this meansā¦
NEW GOBLIN MODELS!!
So if youāre thinking about rolling a new goblin to try it out, come and join the guild with the most BOOM in all Moon Guard - FlashBANG Exports!
(Nevermind those gnomes, they wish they had our ingenuity.)
The easiest way in is to sign up on our discord:
https://discord.gg/hDy8Ktg
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Model updates are here! JOIN US!
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New rp story line, keystone runs, battlegrounds, and Eternal Palace raiding. If youāre green and looking for other like minded players come give us a try!
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THE GLITZ ALLEY GARMENTS SHOWCASE (G.A.G.S.) IS COMING UP THIS SATURDAY!
Hey you! Yes, you! We know ya like to look cool and check out all the latest fashions, so why not stop by the Glitz Alley Garment Showcase and see whatās on offer? If ya buy something from one of our participating retailers listed below, ya might even win a prize!
Now, if ya havenāt heard about Glitz Alley, then thatās a good thing. See, itās an underground bar and casino with nightly fashion parades. We gotta keep it all hush-hush from Gallywix, or heās gonna step in an expect a fair chunk of our profits. Ya donāt want that now, 'cos thatās money outta wallet.
Weāre also looking for models with style. Rock on up. We might even hire ya!
Signed,
Gappy Silvertooth <Bling Merchant>
Szabo <Custom Clothier>
Missa Spekkies <Shades Peddler>on behalf of Glitz Alley, Bilgewater Harbor
This is a Flashbang Exports RP event - a transmog. competition with lots of prizes to be won!
Important note: the event is color-themed. Your outfit must be comprised of no more than the following three colors:
Purple
Grey
Pink
What: The Glitz Alley Garment Showcase (G.A.G.S.)
When: Saturday October 5, 9pm server time
Where: Bilgewater Harbor
Who: Any member of Flashbang Exports or Associates
What to bring: Your color-theme transmog. outfit!
There will be a number of categories for prizes. These are:
- Most Sexy
- Most Flashy Bling
- Most Scary
- Most Gaudy Clown Suit
The judging panel will consist of three goblin judges, who will be scoring out of 3 for the following:
- originality
- color matching
- performance
Fashion competitors will be asked to present their outfits to the audience. This may be via a pose (using an emote, e.g. /wave) and/or a sentence about their ensemble (e.g. āIām Millie, and this two-piece set was sewn by my mother from some harpy feathers I collected in the Barrens.ā)
The competition will be followed by a fashion parade, where all participants march through the streets of Bilgewater Harbor!
Event Poster:
https://i.imgur.com/D04QIaa.png
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Tonight our all-goblin raid team took out Queen Azshara on normal difficulty in Eternal Palace. Quite a feat for a bunch of shortie greenskin roleplayers. No druids, paladins, monks, or demon hunters anywhere to be seen!
We are going to re-clear the raid on normal again as weāve picked up quite a few goblin friends along the way (many from WrA and ED). So weāre going to teach them the fights. Then, weāre going to dip our toes into heroic raiding! Pretty scary when youāre only 4 foot tall. All I can say is NEVER UNDERESTIMATE A GOBLIN!
We are powerful. Join our our team today! Just message any of our goblins for a guild invite.
Also, the new models are so pretty!
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Your brow game is strong, sis. Noice!
Grats on winning those fights AND fostering all gob cooperation because thatās the true achievement.
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So apparently the Horde have made some new allies with the cute little foxes out in Voldun called vulpera. Now my office is inundated with queries as to whether weāre going to let these shorties join our all-goblin crew.
Sorry, but the answer is a big fat NOPE! Furry is not green. Nor do vulpera have the goblin ability to make the megabucks or set the fashion world alight with our amazingly gaudy outfits. Sure, they can scavenge like us, so we got some pretty common goals there. We can be allies. Maybe a party or two.
Flashbang Exports will, however, be open to recruiting gilgoblins if they ever become an allied race (dreams are free). For now, we are sticking to our racially-exclusive theme. All other races (including vulpera) are welcome to join our sister guild, Flashbang Associatesā¦so long as you accept that goblins will always be the superior race!
Cheeky grin
If you would like to join the Flashbang Empire Horde community (which encompasses both guilds) to obtain a guild invite, or just to hang out with us, please copy and paste the following link into your browser:
https://www.worldofwarcraft.com/invite/GMnjKP7tqBm?region=US&faction=Horde
Or copy/paste this link into the join community function in game:
GMnjKP7tqBm
See you there!
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We had a great turn out for our monthly guild meeting for October! Check out these goblins with their serious faces on! (Donāt worry, the party erupted as soon as Hercula dismissed everyone.)
https://i.imgur.com/AAeAY4e.png
For further details on super-secret goblin business, join up to our discord!
P.S. Our meetings are held in the quaint little town of Fuselight in the Badlands, but shhhā¦donāt tell anyone. We might get spied on by gnomes!
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Whatās the news with Flashbang Exports, I hear ya all asking!
Well, weāve made good friends with goblins across other roleplaying servers. That means we regularly hang out with our friends from Wyrmrest Accord and Emerald Dream, and Proudmoore too! Flashbang Exports hosts the weekly all-goblin raid team, and tonight we have the Thousand Islands Barge Bash RP event, which is hosted by Lluagor of ED. Itās great to be a part of this extended community.
I hope yaāll can handle this much goblin, because weāre 100% and weāre not apologising! Bombs, fashion, gizmos, fireworks, hustling schemesā¦you name it, we got it. All goblin classes welcome to join our guild! Just whisper anyone online or join our discord.
Far from being restrictive, being in a goblin-only guild has made me branch out into character classes that I wouldnāt normally play. Iāve usually opted towards hybrid classes with the somewhat delusional idea that Iāll just stick to one character that can play all roles. Of course that never actually happens, because I canāt do all the professions on one character!
Anyway, with druids, paladins, monks, and demon hunters out of the market, that gives me more room to explore some of the other classes Iāve neglected over the years. Classic rogues, warlocks, warriors, even hunters! Sure, Iāve played them, but Iāve never bothered to try all the different specs. My latest foray is into the demonology warlock. Who knew that blowing up imps and summon dreadstalkers could be so freaking AWESOME?! Iām also hoping to try survival hunter one of these days.
Flashbang Exports has a really strong theme that unites our player base. Itās not for everyone, but for most people that try it, being a goblin really grows on you. Do you like being different from all the other players around? Do you like getting pumpkins thrown on your head every time Hallowās End rolls around? Do you like being able to brag about being the most handsome and richest fellow in town, all with a sparkly bling-toothed grin plastered on your face?
The most important thing about being a goblin is being able to laugh at yourself. That means, not taking yourself or WoW too seriously. Our friendly, light-hearted atmosphere is what a lot of people enjoy about our guild. Weāre a team of goofy misfits.
Feel free to shop around, but there is nowhere else like Flashbang Exports!
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Wondering if you be a good fit for our guild?
Hereās the kind of people we are looking for:
- Casual, social players who enjoy a positive atmosphere
- Family friendly. Whether you are old or young, our guild chat is PG rated
- Mains, alts, and people who play odd hours
- People who enjoy achieving goals as a team, rather than as an individual
- Heavy and casual RPers, as well as non-RPers
- People who enjoy end-game group content, such as raids and M+
- People who enjoy having an active guild chat while generally playing solo or doing BGs
Hereās the kind of people weāre NOT looking for:
- Hardcore players who frown on those with RL responsibilities e.g. job, family
- Rapid progression players in rush to conquer the latest content
- Anyone who scorns particular aspects of the game that others enjoy
- Overly-competitive people on a mission to prove themselves better than anyone else
- Negative people that try to discourage others or find the game boring
A note on ERP:
We donāt prohibit anyone from doing ERP if they want to, as long as it is kept private. Our members generally have families or are married IRL. RP dating is not discouraged, but it is not the main focus of our guild.
Commonly asked questions:
Q1. Iāve heard a lot about this guild, and I want to join, but I donāt want to play a goblin. Will you let me in anyway?
Answer:
If you donāt like goblins, then this guild is not a good fit for you. There is enough variety and scope within the goblin race to create a wide range of characters. If all you care about is being āprettyā or āimposingā then you will need to look elsewhere. Being race-restricted means that our members are prepared to make a sacrifice for us, to give up some of their choices to join a special kind of team. If you are prepared to give to us, then we will give back to you.
Q2. How do I join? Is there an application process?
Answer:
Join our discord, or ask any member of our team that is online. We are happy to give IC inductions as your character joins the guild, but it is not required. You are welcome to join or leave as you wish (within reason). We donāt waste your time on lengthy application procedures, so please do not waste ours. This is a guild that trusts its members, and we have no wish to control you. We are all just here to have fun and enjoy the game.
Discord link:
https://discord.gg/hDy8Ktg
We hope to hear from you soon!
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Flashbang Exports guild meeting coming up this Saturday at 9pm in Fuselight, Badlands. Ever seen a large bunch of goblins trying to be serious in a formal setting?
Nope, we havenāt either.
But this is about as by the book as we get, and we have a strict agenda to follow. Thereās also the coveted āEmployee of the Monthā award, as well as grand discussions about the latest profit-making schemes.
New to goblin RP? This is a great opportunity to leap into the thick of it. Contact one of our members for a guild invite!
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Whatās coming up this weekend in Flashbang Exports, you ask?
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Weāre hosting the Moon Guard Horde Guild Expo this Friday at 9pm in the Valley of Honor, Orgrimmar. Itās a good opportunity to grab yourself an employment contract with the guild!
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Following that, our all-goblin raid team hits up Heroic Eternal Palace! Weāve gotten two bosses down so far. Working on Radiance of Azshara.
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Our action-packed weekend continues with guild teams for Mythic Island Expeditions. Need a pet, mount, new transmog, or your weekly AP quest done? We got it covered! Alts welcome.
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After a bit of a sleep, weāre back the next day for Mogs and Mounts run by our main tank Thelldrix! Legacy raids and achievements at their very finest.
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Weāll be chilling for an hour or so at the Wyvernās Tail for our weekly Goblin Social Hour, hosted by the lovely priest Chienne. Hear all about our latest shennanigans.
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To wrap up the weekendās hectic schedule, weāre taking a team into Operation: Mechagon. Weāve cleared that place 3 times now, looking to finish a 4th! Definitely not a piece of cake, by any means. Adventurers come prepped with repair bots!
And thatās only the weekend! We have loads of other stuff happening during the week, including our storyline campaign, The Legend of Lutinādor (also run by Chienne), PvP battlegrounds (hosted by Raztrix)ā¦and much more.
What are you waiting for? Roll up a goblin and join us today!
(What a great excuse to use your free boost! Or re-live the fun on the Lost Isles starting zone.)
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Have you seen our ad in the new guild finder tool? Weāre the ones with the big GREEN banner. And who doesnāt like a bit of GREEN? Itās such a versatile shade. From forest canopies to bubbly slime, from aqua-green marine tones to mold and algaeā¦GREEN MEANS LIFE!
Thatās why weāre gobbos for life. And uhā¦I forgot where I was going with this. Oh right, the NEW guild finder! Just find us and click that "Request to Join: button, and one of our staff will be with you shortly!
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So youāre thinking of joining Flashbang Exports but youāre just not 100% sure? Well hereās a list of awesome things that we have got:
- Goblins.
- Regular RP meetings.
- Green Goblins.
- RP stories and one shot events.
- Small Goblins.
- Not one, but two weekly raids.
- Big Goblins.
- Mythic+ dungeons runs.
- Fun Goblins.
So if you are a Goblin who wants to hang around with a whole bunch of fun Goblins, then we may be the place for you!
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ā¦ and donāt forget, LOTS of explosions!!! 
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You folks sound fun, Imma transfer my hunter over there sometime soon expect a whisper!
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Youāll have a BOOMING good time with us! Just whisper anyone online, or join up on our discord. See you soon on your hunter!
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