The hunt for Broken Tooth was on. After attaining level 37, I had fastidiously learned every single detail I could possibly learn about this elusive cat, and I had spent a total of 18 hours with no sightings. Here, our tale begins.
Background: I’d done research, and it appeared that Broken Tooth should have a spawn timer between 7 and 8 hours. I’d learned the targeting macro trick, and the eagle eye/stand on the mountain trick. Now, let’s begin.
Ah, finally night time had arrived. With all this free time, what could go wong? Time to play classic WoW! Server login, get set, and… 1,500+ person queue on Kirtonos. Seriously? 30 minute wait!? Oh, what’s this? A free server transfer!? After 18 painstaking hours camping Broken Tooth on Kirtonos only to have actually not even seen him spawn (much less actually tame, that’s multiplicatively more difficult), I saw the shining beacon of Hope. Earthfury, here I come!
Zoning. . .
Alright, I’m IN!!! Flightmaster take me straight away to Loch Modan please. Why? Just take the money and ask questions later. A cool, pleasant and relaxing flight later, and I arrived. Cheetah mode engage! It’s time to GET THAT BROKEN TOOTH! WWOOOOTTTTTT!
And so, I weave through the monsters in front of me so as not to get dazed to slow down my quest, and I arrive in Badlands. Why no mount? 40g short I’m afraid. Decided to buy a BiS lvl 42 bow and buy the best scope at a setback of around 20g before I was whisked away to Earthfury. Now, enough with all the piddling talk. On to the sacred mountain that connects all the spawn points of Broken Tooth. Let’s find this ****ing cat tonight!
I feverishly check all the spawn points. Nothing is up. I’m a little surprised actually, but it doesn’t break my stride. I beg for a layer invite only to realize that this is probably the one (the ONLY one, yikes). So, there I go, eagle eyeing every three seconds. . . for 4 hours! Yes, from 10PM-2AM server time, I didn’t blink. I barely squeezed in a whiz. This was business. Broken Tooth must be MINE! Wrists twitching and a work meeting 4 hours away, I decide it best to not go on any sleep. Let’s try again tomorrow.
Work meeting is done, and I have a few spare hours before I have my next appointment. 4 hours and 40 minutes to be exact. That’s plenty of time!
I check all the usual spots. Nothing. I’m not discouraged though; I prod on. Inbetween the searching, I check Google for anything I’ve missed regarding this cat’s spawn, and boy did I find a whopper! Turns out, Broken tooth was tamed at exactly 9:13PM the night before on Earthfury. WHAT A BREAK!! Now, this had to be about right. I had checked between 10PM-2AM last night. I’m fairly certain no one snuck in and got him under my nose. So, that leaves the spawn times to be between 2AM and 6AM. Seeing as this was before this four hour stretch, this all matches. Based on that math, Broken Tooth must have spawned approximately between 4:13AM and 5:13AM server time. Assuming some hunter picked him up within 5 minutes, that leaves me with a new spawn time between 11:13AM and 1:13PM. It’s 9AM currently, so I decide to bunker down. What if that wretch lied to me to throw me off the trail?! It’s possible isn’t it!!
Now, the competition was getting a little fierce. I’m an proud member of the ALLIANCE after all! How could these savage Hordelings keep trodding around and destroying me!? How dare they!?! Yes, yes they may outlevel me, but I’m a HUNTER! I can do this! YAAAA!
Loading. . . Please wait . . .
Okay, so maybe I’m getting decimated, but what they don’t know is I know the spawn timer! Muhahahaha. They can only kill me so many times before they get bored… right? Okay, it’s rapidly approaching 11AM. I start getting a little fidgety. What if one of these vicious hordelings takes my beautiful cat away from me? What if they turn this creature to the dark side!! It must not be allowed!
Alright, let’s see. I’ve got 50g and a wicked bow to my name. I have these horde surrounding me on every corner. What can I do!? A HAH! Yes, I’ll hire a mercenary. I’ll pay them to protect me! Yes, that will do nicely.
/who
Okay, here we go. Two level 42 warriors, a 39 druid and some other lowbies. /tell Warrior1 May I attain your services kind sir?
. . .
NO reply.
/tell Warrior2 May I attain your services kind sir?
. . .
Warrior2 tells you: Whatcha mean bro?
. . .
/tell Warrior 2 How does 50g (and maybe a bonus!) sound for helping me for two hours!? If successful of course. If not successful, I’ll give you 25g for the effort.
. . .
Warrior2 replies: I’m interested. Keep going.
. . .
/r Okay bro, all you gotta do is just kill any horde hunters you see, and at all costs, keep this mob named “Broken Tooth” away from any horde hunters. If you see them taming him, just run and smash that taunt button. 2 hours, but it will probably be much less. Deal?
. . .
Warrior2 replies: Okay. Deal.
YES! I’ve done it! I have the muscle I need now to push back the evil Horde and attain my birthright. Let’s DO THIS SON!!
11:13AM server time:
/r hey bro, stand over near Angor Fortress. If you see the cat, please don’t let any hordeling tame him at all costs!
Warrior2 replies: Sure thing bro.
THIS IS IT! WIthin 2 hours, eternal glory shall be MINE!! Nobody else read that forum post right? Probably not.
Huh? What’s this? A 46 Horde hunter? HEY! STOP THAT! That HURTS BRO! Ugh… everything is going dim.
(In spirit wisp form) /r dude I just got ganked by a 46 hunter, please ruin his day. He’s at the mountain.
Warrior2 replies: On it!
Here we go! It’s a battle for the ages. One determined, brave Alliance warrior versus the evil troll hunter. Ugh, a face that even a mother couldn’t love! The battle is fierce. Blood is spilt, and yes, yes, VICTORY! FOR THE ALLIANCE!
/r DUDE BRO U ROCK ! WOOT LETS GO!!
Clicks respawn
. . .
20 seconds later. . .
/r Um… he killed me again bro.
Warrior2 replies: Oh hell no.
Justice is served. Yes, yes, some may call it corpse camping. Others may call it a sickness. I call it JUSTICE! Yes, sweet justice. Okay, that horde hunter isn’t respawning anymore. I can do this! Let’s do this!!!
1:13PM
/r Um bro… maybe my calculations were off? He isn’t spawning. Maybe he stuck around a few extra minutes before someone tamed? idk
Warrior2 replies: It’s okay man. I’ll stick around for a little longer. We got this.
At this point, I really need to take a leak. Like, my nads are about to explode. I’m not going to go into too much details, but let’s just say I crossed a line into the hardcore today with a Dasani water bottle that shouldn’t have been crossed. But, BT could spawn at ANY TIME DUDE!! Can’t let that happen. HELLS no.
I only have 27 minutes left before I MUST go to this meeting. Yes, it’s that important. Okay, okay, 27 minutes is a long time right?! I’m rush to my closet, put on my dress shirt. Eagle eye ticked down to 40 seconds. 20 seconds is all that could divide me from GLORY and failure! Eagle eye. Button. Eagle Eye. Button. Eagle Eye. Button.
Okay, there’s about 10 minutes left? The warrior agreed to stay until then. This is okay right? I mean, I’ve spent 4 hours and 30 minutes looking, I know the spawn timer, and my luck can’t be this bad. There’s still time.
5 minutes to go.
Palms sweating, forehead a balmy mess, I soon begin to realize. My gamble won’t pay off. Time to face the music and pay the warrior this blasted 25g, that I NEEDED for my Saber mount. Nevertheless, it is what it is. 26 hours in, and I’ve still failed. Is this gaming addiction becoming a problem? Maybe I need to take a couple days break. This isn’t healthy, right?
2 minutes to go:
I’m slunk back in my chair; keys are in my hand. I have this sick feeling in my stomach. I know that the end is here. I’ve lost 25g, done unspeakable things to a bottle of Dasani and wasted 8 hours straight in 2 days. What is wrong with me? What’s worse? i’ve failed. It’s over.
Click. Click. Click.
/target Broken Tooth
(silence)
/cast Eagle Eye
/target Broken Tooth
(silence)
/cast Eagle Eye
/target Broken Tooth
TARGET ACQUIRED>>>>>>>>>>>!!! NO WAY DUDE. NO! POSSIBLE! WAY!! I try to push my heart back into my chest and make a break for it.
/r NORHT!
/r NOTH!
/R SPAN!
/r SPAWN!!!
Okay, maybe I spelled it right the fourth time? But who’s counting? This is no time for correctness. I’ve gotta HAUL!
GO. GO. GO.
Dazed For real? I really didn’t avoid that buzzard right there? Sheesh.
Aspect of the Monkey… /cast Wing Clip…
Enough distance. Yes… Yes… FEIGN DEATH!! GOGOGOGOGOGOGO!!!
THERE HE IS!! THE ONE. THE ALMIGHTY! THE BROKEN TOOTHERINO CAPPUCCINO DUDE.
LETS GO.
/cast Freezing Trap(Rank 2)
/cast Tame Beast
Okay, okay, breathe man. Won’t help you now if you have a stroke and don’t enjoy the pet.
Coast looks clear. No horde see me. Is this it? IS THIS HAPPENING? HAVE I DONE IT?!!
…
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
BROKEN TOOTH ACQUIRED. “Cat” is the UNDERSTATEMENT of the CENTURY.
/feed pet. Okay, gotta feed him QUICK. Don’t leave me bro. I love you long time.
/r I LOVE YOU BRO! ILL GIVE U THE REST DUDE COME HERE!!
/transfer 25g, Needle Threader +5dmg scope.
/r you earned this dude. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOT! I MAY BE A BROKE BIZNATCH BUT IM A BALLERRRR!! HELLLLL YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
/exit
tldr; I tamed Broken Tooth after 26 hours. I had to poop sock it up and take a gamble on paying a warrior 50g + a 20g priced bow for protection for 2 hours to keep the horde at bay. I wrote this the way I did for fun. Hope you enjoyed.
P.S. True story bro.
