What if you woke up tomorrow as Jeff Kaplan?

General Discussion
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Concept is simple: You :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::heart_eyes::star_struck: but last name Kaplan :nail_care:t5::see_no_evil::woman_fairy:

I just want to know what you’d do.

Ngl, I’d immediately shave and

I hope Jeff sees this and dies :joy::joy: like from laughter ofc

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I’d call up Jeff and say “eh, if you are in my old body, you need to get on immune suppressants right now, or you are going to have a bad time”

“oh, and stay away from cucumber, your allergic”

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Over my dead body! Don’t you dare touch that beard!

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But I’d need my bodacious beard buffing bristles to grace Orisa‘s scalp

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BUFF ORISA.

Then I’d ban Genji mains.

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6

Asap.

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i’d add more to the roster, i wont be toxic about it or what ever… just tired of the slow release schedule.

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Oh also I’d probably release some actual lore.

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9

Hmm…

Spend the time game developing and designing as you do. Mayybe push for a wacky experimental card. Take notes about the experience, send them to my real self so I can snag that game designer job at Blizzard when I’m old enough.

oh oh yeah and add an option to turn the blood/oil effects off. Put it in experimental card, make it go in there for over a month to aggravate the players but keep them interested by saying ‘this goes somewhere’ and that somewhere is ‘orisa fortify is now purple’

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Cancel OWL.

Remove Symmetra and Mercy.

Buff tanks.

Remove 2CP.

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sighs “Time to check the forums again…” takes his anxiety pills

scrolls past Mummyhead’s post

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12

I would make a video talking about changes to Moira and Reaper’s aim requirements, watch the forums for a week eating popcorn at all the threads laughing at Moira/Reaper…

but when patch day comes, I give Moira and Reaper a lockon hahaha.

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13

I would make a live video showing his house.

I’m curious :thinking:

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14

I would laugh pretty hard at that.

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You can see some of it in the dev videos over lockdown.

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nerf Hanzo and his ugly face to the god damn ground, BUFF ORISA, BUFF SIGMA, BUFF JEFF’S BEARD GOD DAMMIT!

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I’d toss a coin to my Witcher for I am the Valley of plenty :3

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Alternatively, I would lurk on Twitch and BAN:

  • Smurfs

  • Derankers

  • Toxic people

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Girl I liked that post so many times I—

just going off

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Go back to sleep

There are many jobs I want to have in this world.

But I am not crazy enough to be game director for this whiny community.

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