Watched Iron Man. Love DC more. Iron Man is best super heeo movie. Sorry. Depressed. Know it doesn’t matter. Just want to change the world and make a real friend. Sorry.
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You matter… I don’t know what I can possibly say,
but you absolutely matter…
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I don’t think anyone matters, and me least of all. No one is going to notice when I’m gone. I think that maybe I did something, but the truth is, in the end, my parents didn’t care. I’m all alone. I know I did it to myself… My own hatred at myself made me treat everyone poorly, and I don’t want to reconcile. I’m so stubborn. I just want it to be my fate. I messed up, and despite my condition, I deserve to die alone.
My life could have been so different, but all I cared about was finding the truth. I was brainwashed by religion and fought it. I don’t know if I should have just given in and been ignorant and happy. I don’t think I could have been. I was always going to die young and unhappy, given my circumstances.
I don’t understand how anyone could believe in god. It doesn’t make sense. Was I born to be inferior just to teach you a lesson? How selfish to think.
Yeah, Iron Man movies are really good… maybe the 3rd one was not so good, but the other 2 are great I think! 
And also the new Bat Man movies. Enjoy them.
I should be clear: with modern technology, if I made amends with my parents, they could pay for me to live another 10 to 20 years. But I refuse to, because reasons. Sorry. Im selfish. Sorry. I hate my parents. I know I should just forgive them, but I can’t. I pushed everyone away for a reason. I need to die alone.
Oh no, my initial post got deleted. I like Iron Man 3. It shows Tony at his best and worst.
There is no God. Some things matter more than life. I can’t live without understanding that.
I do see how easy it would be, but that’d only dely the inevitable, and if thete is a god, there should be no dispute that I don’t forgive.
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Shortening your own life outta spite yet angry at God about it? idk about allat. But i wish you well.
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Look at existence itself from another point of view, the meaning of life is to live it, there is nothing else to look for, it is an infinite loop beyond our understanding. As I see it there are two ways, waste your time or time will waste you, even if the destination is always the same for every living thing, don’t run…just walk 
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i hope you feel better moondance. i don’t know you personally so i don’t know your situation with your parents or anything so i won’t judge your decision to not forgive them. it’s not really my place to judge anyway. but i hope you find something in life worth living for. death sucks if you’re an atheist i would think and maybe for other people too.
whatever. i’m just a fool now. not worth reading my post. sorry.
Be sure to watch Rubber, just because, no particular reason.
But for the best films i can recommend will always be the Star Wars series, in its entirety, which includes all the tv shows in order as you progress through the films. If you’re gonna binge anything, it oughta be that… or The Universe series from Science Channel hosted by Morgan Freeman.
I cant begin to know what to say to someone with your situation, so Ill just give you the best media Ive enjoyed. Its what I’d binge if I were in your shoes.
Just know that what you feel, isnt wasted, whether its laughter, tears, hope, despair, or manic focus. Just make your own record of what you can, someone is gonna wanna know not just how you died, but how you lived up until the end. May not be who you expect it to be. But even if you dont think anyone would, make a game or mystery of it and let it be your last bit of mischief. Give them a wild goose chase or like a scavenger hunt to something meaningful or silly, or both.
If all else fails just fall asleep to Cosmos by Carl Sagan each night. Never a bad way to drift off to be one with the universe in your slumber.
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