I’m definitely on the frustration and anxiety side of things, if preference in the community is split on this then providing it as a game option would be best as others have suggested.
Balancing/distribution shouldn’t be a big issue at all. Each piece of loot is assigned to a random player (or in order as suggested above - not per monster obviously). The total amount doesn’t change and it’s fair.
I like the idea of having a short timer, something like 3-5 seconds would be reasonable. A roll/pass would be way too time consuming and emersion breaking in my opinion.