Had to for my sack ,that worgen moon got her mad as … run mage run!
He’s the only Mage I’ve met that conjures terrible Mana Buns. Deal breaker.
4 Likes
I really liked her and all that hands on stuff and levitating while we um… meditated. She did warn me she had no tolerance for monk jokes and that even the word “chip” could set off a berserker rage. I told her “I will never resort to that, Miss Weaver.”
The insurance agent visited me at the hospital and said even the foundation of the house will need to be replaced. /sigh
4 Likes
I told her there was too much light going around in the house, it was hard trying to get some sleep.
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This is funny, considering she’s a walking night-light. The glow was visible through the bed cover’s…
So we staged the first ever night sling shot launch. And we illuminated a Horde spy team sneaking into the bay. Win-win.
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She said I had commitment issues and needed to trust her, while she was wearing an apron that said “I eat my spouse with ketchup.” Suffice to say I stole the pan she was holding, knocked her out, and then left her in Tholin’s outhouse because why not.
2 Likes
Gornur, Gornur, Gornur… What am I to do with you. Yes, I was wearing an apron that said
I would have preferred chocolate, but he has a thing for ketchup 
typically, he failed to notice I was wearing nothing else… I was trying to suggest some new, shall we say, boudoir adventures. As usual, the big dummy fails to get the hint, then overreacts. Luckily he only was able to get in a glaring blow. Horns, natures roll cage.
So I woke up in Tholin’s outhouse. It was actually quite comfortable. Clean and tidy. of course Gornur wouldn’t have noticed that either. He even keep’s beer in there. Well, ok that’s hardly a surprise.
So, after a few beer’s and a nice chat with Tholin, I went home to find Gornur tied up like a Christmas goose. Stinky had ran ahead and alerted they Sling shot boy’s. They sprang, well, lumbered, in to action and caught Gornur while he was packing his condiments. Not a quick getaway expert, this one.
We aimed for the bright spot on the horizon that was Keizari ( yeah, still) and Stinky barked, or whatever that hyena sound is, the launch order.
5 Likes
Because I can only stand the battle cry, ‘In the name of the Moon, I shall punish you’ for so long.
I mean, honestly… I like those Panderan Flip books as much as the next person, but for my spouse to go full fangirl?
3 Likes
We got on well, we liked the same Ogre dramas and Murloc musicals. Dinners were always delicious. I had no problem with the in-laws. The only problem was that I noticed that stuff in my pockets would go missing. A few times a week at first, then several days a week, then every day, then all the time. One day I tripped over a bump in the rug in our living room and moved it to find a trap door, in the room below I found all my stuff and my wife putting price tags on everything!
“What are you doing with my stuff??!!” I asked. She screeched and there was a bright light and a loud crack followed by a smell of burnt Vanishing Powder and she was gone. I haven’t seen her since.
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He put in peanut butter in between his toes and told me to sniff them like one of those French girls.
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He asked me to put peanut butter between my toes, and I cried myself to sleep. 
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Dreanei too puny for orc. Orc would’ve snapped dreanei
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The beard gave me something to hang on to, and that was nice. However, though the poor lad had a certain naïve charm, he just had no stamina…
Did not even bother with a decree absolute. Just blinding powder and vanish.
5 Likes
Typical female that didn’t want to be locked down in marriage. I mean everyone knows all Dwarves have amazing Str and Stam. She complained about my Dex and Furballs so I just let the wild horse go.
5 Likes
OMG another strange male thought he smelled funny at first but then when people came to visit he would drop silverware so he could sniff at their butts as he picked it back up. Even worse was the fact he would stop at every bush and do business. Then he gave it all away when he started doing the nasty on my leg and panting before turning in a Worgen.
slap the transporter device on him and handed the papers and pushed ze button!
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that lack of mobility left me unsatisfied.
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Idk what she was expecting… I’m not a gymnast.
Neither is she, based on the awkward pose as she flew out of the divorce sling shot.
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I asked for some butter on my corn and she responded by putting butter on her horns and charging at me. She somehow didn’t anticipate me dodging and she charged face first into the fireplace and knocked herself out. I pulled her out on the flames, sent her to Argent Tournament Grounds to work out her issues, and then went back to my garrison.
5 Likes
the butter wasnt really for his corn…
and the corn wasnt really for him.
he kept going on and on about butter horns, while painting his feet with peanut butter and chocolate drizzle
hard pass, dropped a portal under my feet and zipped right on out of there
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She said that she “preferred Goblin Engineering”. We’re not talking anymore…
6 Likes