Didn’t appreciate the oompa loompas singing to her about her issues.
3 Likes
Took me to lovers leap and thunderstormed me off the cliff claiming I was too evil for him and that he was tired of having dead Elves ruling his life. 
6 Likes
She divorced me, because she said I was not evil enough for her, and that she was tired of living people ruling her life.
1 Like
he wouldn’t call me names in bed
5 Likes
She wanted me to call her names in bed, but I can’t speak Darnasian.
1 Like
He has bad taste.
1 Like
She’s dead.
1 Like
He’s alive. Had the Ogre’s fix that.
4 Likes
She cheated on me with her Ogres.
2 Likes
Jealous Lies
Oopsie. Wrong thread.
5 Likes
these two kept arguing with each other while on our honeymoon… so ya…
is it because i forgot too say i love you before i left? or did i leave chili fries out by mistake again?
5 Likes
Because new hawkens scares me…
4 Likes
She found men with new customizations scary.
4 Likes
He kept rubbing his rubber ducky on his belly, while saying “Who’s the bad duck? Yeah, you’re the bad duck.”
4 Likes
I came home one afternoon early, my hooficure went faster than expected.
And what did I find? Gornur, wearing a rubber ducky gimp suit, telling the ogre’s to “draw me like your French girl’s”. What does that even mean? Oh, and I almost forgot. All the ogre’s were wearing hunting outfit’s with weird big hat’s, looking confused. And something about a mansion ,and a yacht…
Well, I can’t fire the ogre’s, cause of their union. It’s not like they were cheating on me, anyway.
So we cooked up Gornur with some nice orange sauce. He turned out to be a bad duck…
3 Likes
Her tail got in the way of everything. I tried to explain to her to keep that tail away from me but she insisted on…nvm.
It was the tail.
3 Likes
Got in the way? Or made it better… He will never know, first full moon and he was out the door, like a bad doggo, and got hit by a Tonk.
That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.
5 Likes
There’s only so many times you can walk in on someone being whipped by one ogre, while two other ogres massage their feet with spoons before you have to walk away.
3 Likes
This must be autobiographical, cause as we all know. I have hooves. Stronk, glossy hooves. No ogre is getting near them…
So, cheating with Ogres. That’s worth some divorce papers.
4 Likes
Learned what happened to the other five Enn’s
4 Likes