I divorced Hawkéns because he refused to make chilli fries for me! He said I ate too many of them!
It might have been all those chili fries but he isn’t the one who should be looking pregnant. /sigh
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She keeps letting me marry her then using voodoo to wipe my memory and marry someone else! This relationship is just not sustainable… I keep defalting on my payments due to memory lapses!
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I was stroking her hair when I felt suctions on my hand.
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You didn’t complain that night! And you knew what race I was…OR where you actually drunk and thought I was just a emo blood elf?!! Or a malnourished night elf?!
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i wanted a troll in the sheets, and an elf on the forum. she had it backwards.
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Turns out he is related to my great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grandfather. And that’s just weird.
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Because she has horrible fashion sense.
For an elf, she seems to come from a rather short-lived bloodline. I can’t fathom the idea of losing … AN ELF!
Because we accidentally married the same woman.
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I mean, his name’s Fangalmouth. Things were getting a little too Fear Factor-y in bed for me.
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Kept wanting the Zugzug but never wanted to cuddle. Also would sucker punch me while yelling “for the horde” while cowgirling. First time was funny…20th I just started to wear my helmet to help.
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Would bubble hearth anytime I said ‘We need to talk’.
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It was bad enough he’d yell “For de Light!” when he’d turned on the lamps, but then he started holding up his beer and yelling “For de lite!”. Then he’d get ready for bed and yell, “For delight!” Ugh. I looked down and shouted “For de slight!” He left without saying a word. /sigh
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She /sigh ed too much.
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Never comes out of the workshop since he got that succubus. Don’t even know if he realizes i took the car, the dog, and the booze.
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I never thought about how hard it was to sleep with a spirit healer. I just go right through her!
I’m just not into plain jane humans.
I literally can’t tell the difference between elf males and chicks
She wanted me to wear one of those silly horned helmets.
Figured that meant she’d be happier with her own kind.
That, and all those crystals around the steading: the humming kept me awake at night and by day they nearly blinded me.
Even split and I threw in a keg of Old Battleaxe Mead for no hard feelings.
Skäl.
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