Wisdom from Roald Dahl

This xpac is making a lot of people salty… Veruca Salty.


Veruca Salt: [outside the Chocolate Factory] Daddy, I want to go in.

Mr. Salt: It’s 9:59, sweetheart.

Veruca Salt: Make time go faster.


Veruca Salt: I wanted to be the first to find a Golden Ticket, Daddy!

Mr. Salt: I know, angel. We’re doing the best we can. I’ve got every girl in the place to start hunting for you.

Veruca Salt: All right, where is it? Why haven’t they found it?

Mr. Salt: Veruca, sweetheart, I’m not a magician! Give me time!

Veruca Salt: I want it now! What’s the matter with those twerps down there?

Mr. Salt: For five days now, the entire flipping factory’s been on the job. They haven’t shelled a peanut in there since Monday. They’ve been shelling flaming chocolate bars from dawn till dusk!

Veruca Salt: Make them work nights!


Veruca Salt: [stamping her foot and yelling] Where’s my Golden Ticket? I WANT MY GOLDEN TICKET!


Willy Wonka: I’m sorry, but all questions must be submitted in writing. And so, in the greatest of secrecy, I transported the entire population of Oompa Loompas to my factory here.

Veruca Salt: Hey, Daddy, I want an Oompa Loompa! I want you to get me an Oompa Loompa right away!

Mr. Salt: All right, Veruca, all right. I’ll get you one before the day is out.

Veruca Salt: [whining] I want an Oompa Loompa now!


Mr. Salt: Wonka, how much do you want for the golden goose?

Willy Wonka: They’re not for sale.

Mr. Salt: Name your price.

Willy Wonka: She can’t have one.

Veruca Salt: Who says I can’t?

Mr. Salt: The man with the funny hat.


Veruca Salt: Daddy, I want a squirrel. Get me one of those squirrels, I want one!

Mr. Salt: Veruca dear, you have many marvelous pets.

Veruca Salt: All I’ve got at home is one pony and two dogs and four cats and six bunny rabbits and two parakeets and three canaries and a green parrot and a turtle, and a silly old hamster! I WANT a SQUIRREL!

Mr. Salt: All right, pet. Daddy’ll get you a squirrel just as soon as he possibly can.

Veruca Salt: But I don’t want any old squirrel! I want a trained squirrel!

Mr. Salt: [wearily] Very well. Mr. Wonka? How much do you want for one of these squirrels? Name your price.

Willy Wonka: Oh they’re not for sale. She can’t have one.

Veruca Salt: Daddy!

Willy Wonka: [imitating Mr. Salt] I’m sorry, darling. Mr. Wonka’s being unreasonable.


Veruca Salt: Daddy, I want a boat like this. A beautiful paddle boat is what I want.

Grandpa Joe: [to Charlie] What she wants is a good kick in the pants!


Veruca Salt: [singing] I want the world. I want the whole world. I want to lock it all up in my pocket. It’s my bar of chocolate. Give it to me now.


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