I was tanking a +9 mists which i needed for score. once i paralyzed and ROP, we skipped the pack (you know which one). after killed the 4 casters the affix popped. after clearing the affix i went and pulled the 2 adds before the boss. my thought process was clearing the adds with the affix was priority. well i guess not. everyone else went left and got the buffs in the next room over before coming with me. I died on the pull and the leader said in chat “… the affix its a 9”, then promptly kicked me from the dungeon. What would you have done?
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Paid attention to where the group was going since this is a common place where people go and pick up the buff.
That said, the key was likely easily timeable even with the full wipe so kicking/leaving made no sense.
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I would put this player on my ignore list to never have the chance to play with him again.
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Shrug and realize that’s the extent of player communication today.
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I ping a lot when tanking to let the group know where I’m going to move. You did make the right call but always assume pugs are braindead and need to be told anything that’s not “standard”. If you have to call an audible, /say can help–party chat doesn’t usually throw up a chat bubble and no one will see it.
It only takes a few seconds to get the mushrooms.
This is your fault. You should have map awareness to know where your group is before and during pulls. If you saw them 100 yds away you shouldn’t or wouldn’t have pulled. You just assumed they were there with you.
Learned from what happened and moved on. People like their buffs and if they are all going to do that, maybe accept that what you want and what the group does can be 2 separate things.
Maybe you can ask the person who can open it to wait until trash is done to open it, but most times whoever can open it will be running to that gate for the buffs as soon as combat with the pack is engaged.
Everyone goes to get the buffs. 
I see why you’d think to do that, but this was 100% forseeable. Sucks that they felt it bricked the run. +9s also suck.
I would start by not asking the forums.
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We’ve established a precedent that the tank is leading the dungeon, establishing the route, controlling the pacing. Sure do your best to work together, but at the end of the day perhaps take this advice counter to that precedent with a grain of salt.
It’s not a bad call to kill the two mobs before boss with the affix buff. They can be difficult and the affix buff is better than the primary stat buff. But people are robots and sometimes struggle with anything being different than what they are used to. Imagine the insanity of even kiting them to that buff room, the room with the mushrooms that heal you instantly on click… The insanity of that change of kiting direction would make people lose their minds, until they watch MDI and see nothing performed normal at all and then they say “Oh that’s clever…”.
I have a Dawn route that I currently like better than any public route. Its a 100% exact route. I’ve completed it at a +13 with 2 minutes to spare with 5 deaths. But ill go into a +9 helping friends and some random will say “WTF is this route ><”. Don’t respond at all, put them on ignore and press on. You aren’t the one needing their role to play the game (there isn’t a DPS shortage).
You are playing a brewmaster, something people out out their way to avoid sometimes…
and at 13, it’s far shy of the current best of 18, so it’s rather irrelevant.
If people want to fail some keys by insisting things one way, that’s totally their choice.
This is why I started with:
Poster is so wrapped up in the numbers that he missed the entire point. I could have used the number 14, which some of the top 10 world Brewmasters have, and the point doesn’t change, and guy would still be hyper-focus on 14 being 4 lower than 18. Though the meaning should still work with 10 and 5 for example.
Anything can work, but in this case? tank needed eyes.
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I would have gone with the group and got my buff.
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That wasn’t the issue. It is the tank’s fault if they pulled a pack all alone when 4/5 of the group wasn’t there. This is akin to it being the tanks fault of they pull a big pack or go into the boss when the healer has no mana.