In terms of socializing and making connections with others, I just think it’s interesting how people have different social preferences.
We’re all a little different right?
I came up with a few questions to pick your brains and self reflect. I think it’d be interesting to see what thoughts you guys have on this.
Any of the following can be applied to both online or real world settings. Comment on whatever you like!
Would you say that you most enjoy one-on-one interactions or that you’re most comfortable in groups?
If someone engages you in a group setting, do you feel at ease or would you prefer to be less involved and take more of an observer roll? Do you jump in and add to the discussion or do you wait to be acknowledged somehow?
If someone tries engaging with you in a one-on-one private dialogue, do you find your mind immediately panicking and questioning their motives, or do you welcome the opportunity to develop more of an individual connection?
Do you enjoy a group type social circle that is dynamic and flowing and continuously changing, or a smaller social circle that feels more reliable and predictable?
Do you tend to really like people you don’t know well but tend to dislike them the more you know them…? or do you tend to dislike people you don’t know well but tend to like them the more you know them…? Think about this one.
If you could only choose one of the following for the rest of your life, which would you choose?
to be part of a fun group in which you have continuous but impersonal social interactions and there’s always someone to share small talk with… but have no strong one-on-one connections with anyone.
to have one or two strong friendships/relationships in which you can share and discuss your truest thoughts and feelings and have a high degree of authenticity… but have no super casual connections.
There are times and places for both. Sometimes I prefer groups, with some people I prefer 1on1.
More observer role, but depends on people and how much I know them.
Mix of both. I try not to jump in, but if I need to speak up I do.
I welcome the opportunity and see where it goes.
Smaller, more reliable and predictable group. Large groups have too much going on.
This is a weird one because I have this weird thing I do where if I get too close to a person and know them too well I start disliking them for some reason… I never acted on it and usually goes away but it’s happened a lot. Idk why.
I would prefer this one. I find it easy to make friends. At some point had so many it felt like a job. But nobody knew me fully and I didn’t know them fully. But few close connections, I trust them the most. I can rely on them and they on me.
Not taking anything away from anyone else who also replies, but I just want to say that I found all of your answers truly interesting. You took the thread seriously and shared your genuine thoughts on the various questions, and I appreciate the effort.
One-on-one. I do not participate in groups of any kind.
I would leave.
No.
Yes, that’s why I left.
No, I’m not watching the group. I left when I noticed there was a group.
Neither, I am absent.
No.
Sure.
This has only happened twice.
This is standard for me.
“to have one or two strong friendships/relationships in which you can share and discuss your love for Satan and feelings about demons and enjoy a high degree of authenticity… but have no super casual connections.”
I don’t need casual connections at all.
I don’t really need deep friendships either, but I much prefer them to any sort of casual acquaintance. If we can’t go deep in conversation, why am I even speaking to this person?
if your a decent person one on one if not group content. it don’t take long to figure out if someone just a butthole and you would rather not be one on one better to be in group setting. i talk more with small groups but large groups i only speak every so often just blend off to ignoring most what is said.
When I used to be in raiding guilds, I’d keep to myself and only show up for raid night all prepared with my own consumables and stuff. I wouldn’t ask things from others, I don’t like to owe others stuff but I like sharing mine. Competitive dungeon groups gives me even more anxiety since its such a small group and feels more personal than fading in the background in a raid group. I wouldn’t commit to guilds and people, if I felt it was getting too “personal” I’d vanish in the night into another server and start my new life there.
It got expensive when I had many alts so I just stopped joining raiding guilds and only pugged.
When I discovered Multiboxing was the best time I had in game, I could do dungeons on my own and much of the other stuff that needed grouping.
So I think its good to be mindful of other players and not treat them like poopoo in game. You might not know what people are going through and it might be difficult for them to do simple things like grouping up.
Somehow I don’t have forum anxiety. Thanks for coming to my ted talk.
My favorite part among your all together delightful reply. You’re a uniquely endearing personality Mr. Shreds. I’d tell you to never change but am already fairly certain that you won’t.
i'm a loner so you'd probably not see me socialize; i'm that weirdo that stands way off to the side of raids or pulls up the rear in dungeons. goes with my loner DK character.
most definitely; i'm the observer.
i'll respond, but i'm looking for an escape lol. no offense. i did help one person with depression in a gold shire discussion that went on for 2 hours.
tiny
i'm naturally distrustful and skeptical of everyone and everything until I've witnessed them for a long time.
this was my old gaming clan for R6: Ravenshield back in 2003. I miss those days, but I found myself wanting to be a lone wolf. curse of introversion.
I’m usually a quiet person. I don’t socialize much. I enjoy my Discord family and my guild family. But since I moved, I don’t have any friends here, so I don’t socialize outside of the internet and my husband. Except with family. I’m content to not talk much.
I’ll interact without issue. But I do like observing. I learn more about people that way.
I don’t judge before I know people. And even then, I still try to give them the benefit of the doubt. Even here, I’ll have conversations to a point in order to try to have a normal conversation. But if it keeps devolving, then I let go.
I choose 2.
But I lost my best friends to busy lives. So I don’t really connect with people anymore.
There are two kinds of people: introverts and extroverts.
Extroverts are people who need people. They charge their batteries by being with lots of people. They feel lonely when they are not doing something with other people.
Introverts are people who charge their batteries spending time by themselves. Being with other people is fine to a point, but it uses up that battery charge, and they need to be solitary again to recharge.
This is how people are wired. It’s not something that can be changed.
I’m an introvert. I understand other people need to constantly socialize and hang out with other people. I see no reason to group up with strangers or impose on friends to do things that are better done alone, which they have no interest in doing.
I don’t like groups because groups naturally turn into microcosms and people lose their true selves. Making friends is only interesting one-on-one because there’s no social expectation or peer pressure present to overshadow the individual’s true personality. Groups are reductive, transforming complex beings into basic stereotypes who perform according to expectation.
I'm drained after being with people. If the entire world disappeared right now; I'd just kick back and laugh. i need people to survive, but if I could live without them, i'd be happy as a clam. like that Tom Hanks island movie
