With the Battle For Azeroth expansion at an end, new revelations emerged. The story forum’s factional partisans managed to reach a peace again soon after Evelysaa’s betrayal, and some time later barriers between online platforms broke. Drama and conflict on the internet has never been contained to only one website, but after Shadowlands release, the drama of these websites merged and the story forum found some of its posters stolen away to Twitter, a land of the dead… on the inside. Some of the Warcraft fanbase knew Twitter to be a part of the franchise’s mortal cycle: the players live on the game and the forums until they’ve become so fed up that they let their subscriptions run out and die, then move onto Twitter to serve the franchise after their life in the game. This is where Evelysaa’s 4D chess playing master originated from.
This being was known as The Tweeter, a player so toxic that he was banned from the forums before the game even released. For nearly two decades he had schemed, taking advantage of the conflict-prone playerbase for the goal of making the forums in his image: social media. In 250 characters, he had managed to convince Evelysaa. She would work with him to destroy the forums and replace them with social media itself. Because surely something with a letter limit with small posts to be taken out of context isn’t so restrictive to be a prison.
Twitter is a realm of infinite audiences, and one player in particular created a pocket dimension for keyboard warriors from World of Warcraft, but not just any type: Social Justice Warriors. This player is Baalsamael, someone with a questionable ethnicity and love for diversity. He had become a god above the forums SJWs who served him in hopes of someday joining him in Twitter fame. But this put him in conflict with another clout chasing Twitter user, a being known as Grandblade. With the website barrier broken open after Shadowlands release, posters were being funneled into Twitter, with Baalsamael taking some of them before Grandblade could.
Not long after Twitter had become the focus of posters, Grandblade came to collect. In need of help, Baalsamael called upon a group of forum noobs to assist him. Just like the forums, Twitter has a system for likes, but these likes are different; likes on Twitter bring fame, and with fame come power. Other Warcraft posters on Twitter were in service to Baalsamael, and he would need likes from their followers to win. It would just be a matter of convincing them, which he tasked the noobs to do.
Upon loading Twitter, a public exchange between Baalsamael and Grandblade took place. “Where ya be hiding all them Warcraft likes, Baalsamael? Give them to the boss man now or you gonna be sorry. Really sorry!” Grandblade threatened.
“So you can be stealing them? No, they’re from my people Grandblade. No way I gonna give dem up!” Baalsamael replied. He was very protective of his likes.
“Ya always be soft, Baalsamael. Weak. Sooner or later, you gonna break. Then The Tweeter be getting what he wants.” Grandblade retorted.
With that, the noobs reached out to their first target: a poster named Erevien. A highly controversial Blood Elf, he had been recently banned from the forums for incredibly aggressive posts. Despite being widely disliked, there were a substantial amount of followers who would support whatever he posted. While siding with such a reject could be seen as disgraceful, it was needed in a time such as this. Baalsamael explained how to the noobs.
“Now here’s a poster you might remember! Erevien always be wanting likes for his posts and Baalsamael always be willing to make a deal.” Baalsamael and Erevien were ideological opposites, but the story forums were at stake. “Sure Erevien is an unrespected poster. Just get me likes.”
To capture Erevien’s attention, the noobs called him out in a tweet about his lack of popularity, in which he responded. “I have power! I will be unbanned again!” In reply, they taunted him about his political views. This infuriated him.
“Face the wrath of a German! Fascists, tweet in service of Erevien!” At his call, his followers replied to the noobs, in support of him. This pleased him. “Your posts sustain me!”
With this display, the noobs pointed out how their confrontation brought Erevien much attention. Realizing this, Erevien decided to join Baalsamael’s side. “The power is mine.” With a tweet, he directed his followers to like Baalsamel’s posts. The first target was acquired.
“Old Erevien, he a nasty one. But you be making him pay. Sooner or later him gonna be back. You can’t keep a bad poster down.” Baalsamael DM’d the group.
Grandblade then called out Baalsamael again. “Me want them likes Baalsamael! Me want Portergauge and all the others! It ain’t wise to be holding out on Grandblade!” He threatened.
“Ya gone and forgot what it meant to be a Warcraft player! Your bond with the people, the experiences you share.” After that reply, Baalsamael felt a pang of pain. The tweet got ratio’d. He had been too positive.
“The only power that counts is negativity! And negativity be coming for them all!” Grandblade retorted. It was time for the next poster. A Gnome.
“Ya know, it don’t just be Horde who be coming to ask for old Baalsamael’s opinions. All kinds be tweeting me! Like this crazy Gnome here. We both hungry for power, so me happy to oblige. But now me be needing his likes.”
This Gnome, Smallioz, was a notorious poster who had become infamous in real life. Like his character, he was a manlet. With being a manlet comes rage. An incident in a bagel store of him having a tantrum had been filmed and gone viral. He then sought attention ever since.
“What have we here? That lame old SJW has sent like farmers? But I haven’t got enough attention today!” Smallioz replied to the noobs who asked him for help. This might not be as easy as they thought.
Unlike with Erevien, the posters sought diplomacy first. They asked how his day was, which resulted in a rant about him not being able to hook up with women on dating sites. “Why is it okay for women to say, oh you’re five feet, on dating sites, you should be dead?! That’s okay?!” Smallioz asked, slamming his short fingers into his keyboard.
“Women in general have said it on dating sites! You think I’m making that up?! Everywhere I go I get the same freaking smirk, with the biting lip!” Before Smallioz could make another tweet, one of the noobs told him to calm down. This infuriated him.
“Shut your mouth! You’re not God, or my father, or my boss!” This blowup resulted in much attention, bringing posters to like his tweets in sympathy. This surprised Smallioz. He became overwhelmed with a different emotion.
“You noobs are the best, let’s never fight again! For awhile, atleast.” With that, Baalsamael had his support. Those who saw his viral tweets were directed to Baalsamael, who in turned liked his tweets. They were getting close to overcoming Grandblade.
“Now ain’t that sweet. Old Baalsamael has had his share of romance back in the day. More than his share.” Baalsamael remarked. It’s probably true, he looks like a mix between Gigachad and Osama Bin Laden.
“Don’t be forgetting who made you famous, Baalsamael! Now gimme dem likes and kneel before me!” Grandblade called out with Baalsamael then replying. “That was long ago, but me remember. Remember how the posters be turning away from ya, after being ratio’d, that incident with the blood in your apartment.”
“Me don’t need followers! The Tweeter gonna give me all da power I need and Baalsamael da one who gonna be forgotten!” Grandblade replied. He was getting impatient. The noobs had to hurry to the next poster.
“Now old Baalsamael don’t just be making deals on Twitter. Elves be looking for power too. All kind of power. This one ain’t gonna be wanting to give me likes easily. So careful now, she’s tricky.”
This was in reference to Kyalin, a Night Elf poster. She was famous for making long essays that took hours to read. Her tweets matched in duration. She’d be the toughest to convince yet. They approached cautiously.
As with before, the forum noobs asked for her help politely. Immediately they were assaulted with a barage of tweets. It was difficult to keep up. Tweets were made about the philosophy of Night Elves and detailed information about accounting. The noobs carefully and swiftly scanned the tweets in order to make proper responses, and she kept tweeting.
“I get the feeling that Horde players and Blizzard tend to feel this way about storytelling in WoW - and I pull Horde players into this because they’re very focused on what’s going on with their characters, and how Blizzard likes to yank them away. I feel that, certainly moreso than with the Alliance, Horde player investment is vectored through these characters - such as how the Orcs for two expansions were personified and expressed with Garrosh. A stronger example though would be Sylvanas, who the Forsaken are absolutely nothing without - to the point where she has her own fanbase who, bluntly, don’t actually seem to care about what happens to the Forsaken as a playable race, but DO absolutely care about what happens with Sylvanas - to the point where they will cheer their dark lady on even if she is likely never going to lead the playable race again. Outside of the humans, Alliance playable races don’t have this kind of strong character identification, and the appeal of the various races is instead focused on those races in them of themselves - with a big part of this having to do with reactive, passive, or just poorly written characters who are weak by comparison to their more charismatic Horde counterparts. Night Elves stand, for instance, in stark opposition to the Sylvanas example. Prior to Battle for Azeroth, before she was established as the champion of an inter-alliance struggle against Anduin’s approach towards the Horde, Tyrande’s character had been so thoroughly vandalized that there were widespread calls for her replacement or removal from what should have been her own fanbase. Malfurion wasn’t much better - his popularity nosedived after Cataclysm, recovering only when his interests were placed in alignment with those of the playable race. The common people, or the idea of them matter. The major characters? Not as much.”
“Horde players want an Alliance that bends and twists to its will. They want a morally corrupt antagonist that they can justifiably beat up. That concept not only doesn’t exist, but can’t exist in a satisfying MMO, period. Horde players also do not want to reconcile with the moral bankruptcy that the writers heaped onto the faction, or accept that whatever happens to them impacts the Alliance and vice versa. The Horde cannot be redeemed, fixed, rehabilitated, or changed - assuming that we as players have any influence, which we don’t (the writers have utter scorn and contempt for us) - until we all agree that everyone deserves a satisfying experience, and then actively work to create that satisfying experience. We won’t do that because everyone is hurting right now, and no one wants to give anything up.”
“No, you’re not missing anything. You are simply watching a team that badly wanted to watch the Horde burn Teldrassil now clumsily attempting to close out a story that they never thought through in the first place, in a way that minimizes at least some of the damage. They seem to believe that Night Elf fans can be placated by pretty and druidy things, and shiny keys like new customizations - rather than real or meaningful resolution… or perhaps just the respect to not use up an entire playable race for cool marketing visuals.”
“I had this realization when I was at Sprouts the other day and I see this perfectly normal guy wearing a Horde t-shirt, and here I am imagining all of the things I would have unloaded on him if he approached me. I ended up keeping my distance.”
Eventually the forum noobs were able to get through to her, miraculously using enough rational logic to get her support. With that, Kyalin made a tweet supporting Baalsamael, rallying the Night Elf fans on Twitter. Under guidance of their t-shirt hating philosopher, they liked Baalsamael’s tweets. There was now enough support to go against Grandblade. The time had come.
“Them Elves be up to something. You best be keeping an eye on them. Now bring me my likes.” Baalsamael commanded, soon getting them. Grandblade then tweeted against him.
“These little friends of yours think they gonna help ya Baalsamael? What chance you be having against me? It be Grandblade who brought Simaia to The Tweeter’s side, struck a deal for Elon’s spaceship, and made da High Elves rage with a message!” Grandblade admitted. So much evil had been revealed to be due to him.
“You think ya won boss man? Maybe you been skulking in the shadows for too long. Come on now. I’ve got support for more likes than you now!” Baalsamael bragged.
With that, the two began to argue. “Dis be your end, Baalsamael!” That tweet got little support, in contrast to the replying one which had a positive vibe. This surprised Grandblade, who pushed onwards. “Negativity be mine to command!”
Despite Twitter users indeed being a negative bunch, they didn’t like having that acknowledged. This sparked backlash, which Grandblade promptly responded to. “You’re all so small, so weak! Copium take you!” With so many Twitter users being argued against, Grandblade’s tweets took massive hits, getting highly ratio’d.
This growing controversy caused Grandblade to lose most of his followers, which he needed despite claiming to the contrary earlier. In confusion, Grandblade tweeted. “No, you’re just forum noobs! How dis be?” Behind his computer screen, Baalsamael laughed.
“Times change mon. Forum posters never be as weak as ya believed them to be. Ya see, they have potential. But don’t ya be worrying about thing, you’re gonna be having plenty of time to learn from your mistakes.” Grandblade’s toxicity had become noticed at this point, and with that he was given a long Twitter suspension.
With Grandblade being an ally of The Tweeter, this was a substantial blow to his plans. The Tweeter needed likes to reach his goal and this was a well that had dried. Yet even then there were other allies of his that would need to be dealt with. The forum posters had much ahead of them. The soul of the World Of Warcraft counted on them, and they’d be there to protect it.