Rogue Thoughts : I lost a bet and now I have to make it everyone else's problem

So I lost a bet and have to go shirtless until the start of Feb, and as part of the bet, I have to figure out how many other ways that Xal’atath could mess with us now that the Neruwubians have been massacred and all of our forces were shifted to the Isle of Dorn by boat.

With Dalaran gone, our access to easy mage portals to shuffle troops around the world is gone, and while Jaina, Thalyssa and other powerful Mages can certainly create Portals large and strong enough to funnel strike-troops through, whole armies is another matter entirely. There’s also the issue of Portals being easy to block if you know where the Portal is going to be opened, and distance puts a further strain on not only opening said Portal, but maintaining it for long periods of time.

And we kinda never fully or completely cleaned up our messes …

The Twilight Hammer Cult is still lingering on, and we’ve seen it has deep roots in both the Alliance and Horde.

The Scourge in the Eastern Plaguelands got rocked, but was never completely defeated, and the Scourge in Northrend is just awash in Undead Warlords pushing and shoving for position now that the Helm of Domination has been remade into the Crown of Will, and despite all their best efforts, the Argent Crusade and the Ebon Blade haven’t been able to do more than keep the Scourge of Northrend contained and focused inwards.

We are missing an Elemental Lord of Fire, and the power of Shadowflame was staggering. We’ve also seen political squabbles between the four Elemental ‘Factions’ in the Elemental Plane can have devastating effects on the world, and Fyrakk’s spirit was said to have gone to the Elemental Plane of Fire, meaning we could have a potential Fire Lord who would be all in on ruining our day, just out of spite and a desire to pay us back in suffering.

Rock Daddy Iridi-kun He’s so gosh darn cool Hear Me Out Loves to hide in the deepest of crevasses :mountain_snow: Iridikron :mountain_snow: is still out there and also allied with Xala’toesies, and our entire military force and most of our champions are underground right now, and he has a deeply personal grudge against us, both for killing Fyrakk and our part in ‘turning’ his sister, Vyranoth, away from their shared cause.

But more importantly, we are ‘Children’ of the Titans and as such, either servants to his cause at best, or targets to be crushed as soon as he can safely do so without jeopardizing his overall goal of defeating or slaying the Titans directly.

Azshara is also apparently coming back and her return is tied to the Naga events on the Siren Isles, but we’re not told, or shown, exactly what she is after on the Siren Isles, or how deeply she’s found her tentacles into the Void after swearing to not deal with any more middle-men or lesser servants of the Void, and this is one of the most powerful Arcanists on the planet. Mannoroth took one look at a pre-Mutated Azshara and decided he’d serve the Legion better as an advisor to the Queen rather than a smoking corpse at her feet.

Mannoroth the Flayer, one of the most sadistic, cruel and fight-happy creatures in the known universe took one look at Azshara’s base form, which didn’t even come up to his ankles, and decided he did not want that smoke. We had to sacrifice one of the Pillars we spent all of the Legion expansion getting all sweaty over just to deal with her, and we have no idea if that means Azeroth is exposed to Demonic invasions again, or if we just earned the ire of one of the primary Titans of the Pantheon.

We have not actually met the full might of the Naga. I want to lay that out clearly.

We fought one single faction in Outland that had been assigned to aid and support Illidan because Azshara needed the demons occupied while she played 4D chess with an Old God and was about to win before we staggered onto the field and ruined her play.

We have fought separate Naga factions through the Wrath of the Lich King, Cataclysm, Legion, Battle for Azeroth and then the Dragonflight Expansions, and these were all separate armies.

These were detachments of the Naga ‘Clans’ that we have fought, not the entirety of their people. Not even a fragment of the true, unified might of the Naga Empire, that has grown and spread, mutated and evolved, untouched and unrivaled for 10,000 years, glutted on the secrets of the Void, the mysteries of the Titanic facilities they uncovered at the bottom of the ocean, and their own dark and sadistic intelligence as they turned the flesh-warping sorceries of the ancient Kaldorei Empire upon themselves, adapting their own people to new roles, twisting them into abominations even by the Nagas’ own standards to serve as more effective shock-troops, spellcasters and heavy infantry, all the while using all that knowledge to enslave and mutate any aquatic life in their path to serve similar goals.

And unlike her previous ‘partners’, Azshara will know exactly what Xal’atath is up to and be more than willing to counter treachery with treachery, with Game recognising Game. The precarious tug-and-pull alliance between two powerful tentacle monsters whose plans have enmeshed and whose machiavellian plots duel for dominance could unravel Azeroth in ways we’re not ready to witness.

There’s also the case of all the Blood Trolls of Nazmir all just up and vanishing without warning, and there’s plenty of Tribes all around Azeroth who have lost home and family to the Alliance and the Horde, who fell to blood magic under Hakkar and his Old God Masters, who might eagerly throw in with Xal’atath, uncaring that this is a one-way trip to self-destruction, so long as they pay back their pain and humiliation ten-fold in the process to everyone who they feel is responsible, and these are Trolls in the worst sense, who don’t even respect each other, let alone the other Tribes, let alone Non-Trolls.

While we saw many Mogu side with followers of Ra-den, we also saw many more willing to ignore the coming of the Void and Nyalotha, their ancient enemy to which they were built to oppose, just to try and lay claim to the Golden Vale themselves. The Mogu are almost all entities of dark passions and merciless ambition, and have long been skilled in manipulating and controlling both blood magic and the dark energies left permeating Pandaria with Y’Shaarj’s death and the burial of his ever-beating Heart, and we saw them heading out across Azeroth during the Battle for Azeroth expansion for Azerite, new lands and slaves, and forgotten relics to expand and empower their forces in service of some new master or Emperor, and we never quite clued in to who they served.

There’s also the Night Squall, the Kaldorei pirate who can supposedly just sail through the storms that cut off one half of the planet from the other, and we never learned who taught him this trick.

There’s the Twilight Dragon Flight that is down their Broodmother and might be howling for revenge, especially if she was able to bear several clutches of eggs and they successfully hatched and matured, as we saw Wrathion achieve ‘Drake’ status in a little less than 5-8 years. There’s also artificial aging magics as we saw used on the Orcs, and Xal’atath is a lot more controlled and practiced than a bunch of ex-Shamans being spoon-fed demonic magic to turn them into useful tools for the Legion’s ambitions for Azeroth.


But what are your thoughts?

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I just need to pluck this fantastic quote out as a reminder that Azshara truly deserves being the Big Bad of her own expansion, not a tacked-on patch raid like in BfA. Blizzard needs to respect the OG narcissistic but scary-powerful queen because their own Lore characters certainly do.

Also, I misread the title and opening paragraph as “me being shirtless is now a you problem.”

OK Jailer

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Technically also true.

And ow, that did more damage than the radiotherapy did.

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I liked those story bits on the siren isle because it reminded me a lot of Return of the Obra Dinn

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LOL sorry, I recently ran Sepulcher for transmog and was giggling while the Jailer’s armor dissolved during his death scene just so we could glimpse his nipples one more time.

People joke about Xal’atath and the clear foot fetish but the Jailer had something else going on entirely.

Anyway, you’ve established again and again that you would have written the Jailer and Shadowlands as a whole so much more competently so let’s go with your version of story vs. the sad parody that we got. In that way, take it as a compliment? XD

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