Against the wishes of the leadership in the guild I am in, I have decided to help them recruit. I’m not sure if they’re even looking for people but just in case they are, I’m here to help. Below, I’ve professionally written a guild recruitment ad followed by a short questionnaire for you to copy/paste/answer (shortcuts, respectively: control c/control v/alt F4) into your very own reply. The chances that I will ever view any of the replies are of the big bang theory variety. So, here is the guild recruitment ad that I hope none of the officers in my guild ever read.
OMG, HI THERE! Are you guildless or even worse, stuck in a boring drama-free guild? Well, YOU ARE IN LUCK. Not only is Catastrophe a guild, but it is also full of drama. Why, just minutes ago, I asked an officer how come babies are born so small and why don’t they talk. They didn’t answer. It’s been two minutes. They could be afk. Or just don’t think my question is important. Which it definitely is. Dramatic, right? BTW, I will not update on whether they answered or not. You’ll have to join to find out. Are you tired of not being invited into raids because you don’t have the gear or experience? Join Catastrophe and we’ll tell you all about the LFG system or at least tell you how to google it. We’ll even link you some of your BIS pieces we’re wearing to give you the motivation you’re searching for. So join Catastrophe or end up homeless and afraid. The choice is yours. To be considered, fill out the application below and post your answers in a reply.
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If I was your GM, would you love me unconditionally?: (Multiple choice) A. Yes. B. I do not have the capacity to love.
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If we were marooned on an island together and I kicked you out of the guild because you were eating too much of the limited food supply on the island, would you leave quietly or would I have to call security?
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If we killed a raid boss together and your BIS piece dropped and it just so happened to be a transmog I didn’t have, would you roll on it? (Multiple choice) A. No. B. Also No.
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Will you help us pay for our Ventrilo server by paying for our Ventrilo server. (Multiple choice) A. Would love to. B. I’ll do it without even joining the guild.
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Why are babies born so small and why don’t they talk?