Here’s something completely different. Inspired by some of the posts in my “Cultural Headcanons” thread, I thought it would be interesting to see how y’all think Azerothian biology might differ from real world biology, etc., etc., and so on.
Do pandaren have eyeshine? Do draenei chin-tendrils serve a purpose, or are they just vestigial? Does the elven eye glow change how they perceive the world?
Have at it, WrA!
Draenei Horns are hollow and can detect shifts in air-pressure letting them know when a storm is coming.
Troll Tusks can be ground down and made into a poultice that can be used to grant regeneration to allies for a short period of time, on an active wound.
Forsaken routinely rip off their own limbs to bash one another over the head before re-attaching them. This is considered an affectionate gesture of annoyance with another Forsaken. The removed limb remains animated and linked to the Forsaken’s will. This results in many gentlemen Forsaken enjoying flirtatious antics with Forsaken ladies, who in turn rip off their arms and beat the offending male over the head repeatedly.
Orcs have an extraordinarily adaptable genetic makeup that they evolved for the harsh conditions of Draenor. The result is that, within a generation, an Orc can adapt to nearly any condition.
Frostwolves adapted a resistance to cold, hence why they tend to show as much skin as other Orcs and still be okay. Blackrocks adapted a resistance to heat and be mostly unbothered by open flames right up against their skins. Laughing Skulls require little water due to their adaptation of Gorgrond.
This also results in them being so susceptible to mutation, be it at the hands of the Legion, the Lightbound or the Botani who infest them.
draenei have scent glands on the bottom of their hooves and draenei female tails are prone to deformities due to their vestigial nature.
draenei also have body temperatures much higher than a human’s due to their size, which also goes for most other larger races.
night elf women have body hair along with all the trolls.
dwarven mother’s milk is higher in fat than usual, making it richer and more nutritious for infants - explaining why dwarves are so beef.
orcs have to eat a lot. their freakish low body fat builds require constant sustenance and this also explains why they ruin the environment wherever they go.
Night elves when as they grow in age slowly develop things such as back and joint issues. These have always ultimately been off set by the access to druid magic. It is also why the Queldorei/Sindorei gradually evolved from them when split and become overall smaller.
Kul Tirans are ultimately as large as they are because they enjoy a high starch, high protein diet since they don’t have access to huge swaths of land to farm grain. This combined with a high activity life style where upper body strength is useful (that navy life) they are physical hulks compared to their mainland kin.
Pandaren are pound for pound actually the physically strongest race on Azeroth. Multiple occurrences in quests show Pandaren with seemingly little effort carrying people and heft objects that would otherwise require multiple humans or orcs to move. This is one reason that multiple established tough people in the Horde and Alliance did not test Taran Zhu’s patience much when he was in the same room.
Beefy Kul Tirans are beefy because of intermingling long ago with the friendly drust. As such, they’re probably the closest living relations to the original Titanforged Vrykul, and possess high strength, and bone density that makes it very difficult to actually break anything.
Gnomes are honestly a lot stronger and denser than they look.
Granted, this also holds true with almost every single race in WoW so they’re still prime “Fastball Special” ammunition.
Pandaren have a natural resistance to void mutations due to their exposure to the Sha. Subsequently also being more resilient to void magic in general.
(as per the MoP cinimatic) Pandaren eyes have some eye shine and some level of glowing eyes. This could possibly be due to some interacial breeding with night elves before the sundering.
Tauren tend to have arthritis around their hump due to the curvature of their spine when they age. Naturally this hump is more muscle than a fat pad to support their upper bodies and head.
Pandaren have some of the most diverse gut flora in the world of azeroth. Being able to digest anything remotely edible due to this in conjunction with extraordinarily potent gastric juices.
I always figured that had more to do with the water from the Eternal Vale.
Honestly thats a good idea as well! My only issue would be that Chen is from the isle. Unless your saying like for the origins of the species since they apparently congregated around the vale. Of which I would then also agree that could possibly be a origin for it!
Pandaren much like bears, do not suffer any negative side effects from being overweight. You see it mentioned by them time and time again in quests or even the players character /emotes about being fat only being a good thing for them.
Nightborne have really weird sleep schedules. Since they didn’t have day or night, they eventually settled into an efficient period where one third of the population was always sleeping while the other two thirds remained awake.
Nightborne also have very sensitive eyes to light. They lived in a very low-light environment for ten thousand years, so their eyes adjusted accordingly. In a funny turn of events, this has led to many being more irritable when living outside Suramar.
This is a popular one I’m sure you’ve heard, but undead do not need to eat. However, eating does repair damage, which is useful in a pinch during combat. It’s why cannibalism is seen among those who have “given up” on their humanity or members of the the Scourge, who are directed pragmatically by the Lich King.
I thought the Pandaren in the trailer was Taran Zhu, though?
Draenei tails grow for their entire lives, and only get more prehensile with age.
Human beds are incredibly uncomfortable for female draenei - being the spinal equivalent of a pug will do that to you. The lumbar pillow industry is thriving, though.
In line with humans having red blood and draenei having blue blood, night elf blood is actually a shade of purple, but human eyes can’t tell the difference.
After a certain point, getting more powerful makes you physically bigger. That’s why raid bosses are so gigantic.
Night elf ears droop as they get older; we never see it, but when most elves are at home, they wear this piece of jewelry that pulls the tips of their ears upward via a chain to prevent this.
The “Goku hair” styles for male humans are actually as close to natural human hair as we’re shown.
With nothing to bother them, a human can actually live upwards of 200 years. We just never see it because their population keeps getting decimated.
Worgen, pandaren, and tauren fur retain dye insanely well, which is why they can change their entire color from head to toe at the drop of a hat. The process is basically just taking an ink bath.
Naw its chen, the reason I know is because its referenced in the pearl of pandaria short stories somewhere. Not to mention Taran Zhu doesn’t wear armor like that. But Chen does.
I get the feeling if the pandaren in the trailer had been Taran Zhu, the Alliance and Horde might have simply been down a Orc and Human, given how the guy abhorred outsiders fighting on his homeland.
Draenei beauty standards value even headcrests on men, having an asymmetrical headcrest, even if the differences are small is heavily disliked. Headcrests are also the equivalent of a giant toenail (gross) but can be clipped and even shaved down. So a Draenei spa day not only includes hoof trimming but can include head trimming.
Having hair and no headcrest is also considered asethetically displeasing on men. Which is why you don’t see many men with a small headcrest and long hair like women. Though honestly I’d prefer less sexual dimorphism between men and women races in WoW but this is what I got to work with. So with that said, Draenei women can also grow large gnarly headcrests but seldom do because of the gendered beauty standards.
If my armoury is displaying right now, Juspion has the equivlant of a Draenei comb over and is waiting for his crest to grown back. He is very self conscious about this. However he doesn’t want to shave it down and start fresh because he’d have cut his hair off and Draenei hair also grows slower and Juspion really like his hair.
Bears are pretty “fat” and they’re incredibly fast. Like terrifyingly fast. (I’ve been chased by a bear, true story. I’m not ashamed to admit I panicked, did the one thing you’re not supposed to do, and nearly soiled myself)
Anyway, with that in mind, this logic holds up. Pandaren are impossibly nimble for their size.
My pandaren monk routinely ran up trees and kept up with jungle trolls vaulting from limb to limb. Why? Because I said so.
Humans are a disease.