Language Cop Pet Peeve Megathread--Let It All Out, My Nerds

Could’ve is a contraction for could have.
Would’ve is a contraction for would have.

Ex.: He could have made that goal if he just would have run a little faster.
Ex. (with contractons): He could’ve made that goal if he just would’ve run a little faster.

There is no “could of.” There is no “would of.” Those mean nothing. They are non-things. They don’t exist. They are horrifying.

Okay…add your own. NO quoting other people’s posts. This is not a shame thread. This is an “I have to get this off of my chest in a polite place” thread.

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irregardless

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“thats called prejuice”

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“Pacifically, he said…”
Please tell me more about this man’s ocean sentence, friend.

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You could have made a thread about something else.

People who type ‘definitely’ as ‘defiantly’.

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Excellent use of “could have,” Orctang. Excellent.

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This is AN “I have to get this off my chest in a polite place” thread.

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Right you are, Loquetar. I shall fix it immediately.

(but you did break the only rule with stupendous speed. /tsk)

Should’hev
Could’halv
Would’helf
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.
.
.
.
.
.
(I’m turning this into a helf thread tehehehehehe)

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I break all the rules, baby.

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Noted for future reference. :stuck_out_tongue:

You’re = You are
Your is possessive. (Whatever floats your boat)

They’re = They are
Their is possessive (I sank their boat by accident)
There is locative (I put that there)
“thare” is nothing.

To = directive (I am going to the store)
Too = additive (I want to go to the store, too!)
Two = numeric (There are two babies in this trash can! Help!)

I am going to help the two babies, too.

The word “it” does not follow standard grammatical conventions. The word “its” is possessive, while “it’s” means “it is.”

It’s unfortunate that people do not care about grammar, but to each their own.

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I never could of guessed. I wish I would of known.

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Ah, Skérge, my fabulous mostly-naked caped crusader…you can always be counted upon.

One that still trips me up is “try and”.
“I’m going to try and go to the store today.” …No, it’s “I’m going to try to go to the store today.”

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I have made a drinking game out criminal grammatical crimes against the poor victim that is the word “literally”

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Hey…aren’t you that guy that dances in the cathedral and makes people angry? I haven’t seen you around as much lately.

Here = place
Hear = listen

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What about people who can’t keep the same tense in one sentence?

“This needs nerfed”

It should either be “This needs nerfing” or “This needs to be nerfed”.