VI. Goblins
aka “little green sh**s”
Goblins are the little green sh**s responsible for much of the Horde’s lackluster, ill-conceived and poorly executed attempts at technological innovation (which usually results in the well-deserved death of many goblins). Driven by their addiction to money, goblins are by far the weakest of the Horde-aligned species not only physically but also in terms of their allegiances.
Physical Attributes:
Goblins resemble ugly little forest troll babies who were discarded like garbage due to radiation-induced deformation. With large heads and even larger ears, goblins rely on their inventions to enhance their combat capability, often controlling shoddily constructed shredder mechano-suits to put them on equal footing with typical Alliance foot soldiers.
Behavioral Traits:
Greedy, shifty, dishonorable little liars. The only thing goblins care about is money.
Weaknesses:
The goblin addiction to money is their greatest weakness. Almost any goblin can be bribed, so long as they won’t face serious danger or they believe they can get away with whatever it is they are scheming. Goblins easily succumb to even the most basic enhanced interrogation techniques if they are offered an opportunity to get some coin in exchange for making the discomfort stop.
Conclusion:
Goblins are more a liability to the Horde than an asset. Exploit this weakness to the fullest, and failing that, crush them like the little green cockroaches they are. Demolish any tech they leave behind so it doesn’t fall into the wrong hands or spontaneously explodes, causing injury to Alliance personnel. Due to their size, a goblin’s head is the most vulnerable part of their body - it is recommended to simply cut this off incase their extremities are mechanical in nature and removal would be ineffective.