Installation stuck on "initializing"

Blizzard launcher is stuck on the dreaded “initializing” loop. I’ve been scouring blue posts, but updates are generally a few weeks old and the solutions are redundant on most threads.

-Newer computer that has never had B-Net or WoW on it before.
-Tried installing B-Net and WoW in different locations.
-Turned off Windows Defender.
-System restarts/shutdowns.
-Updated GPU (nVidia) driver.
-Windows 11 is up to date.
-Installed/uninstalled B-Net multiple times, ran as administrator.
-Let the loop run for >1 hour.
-Went through a deleted B-Net related folders in %PROGRAMDATA% %LOCALAPPDATA% and %TEMP%, as shown here https://us.forums.blizzard.com/en/wow/en/wow/t/cannot-install-game/1421756/2

I’m coming back to the game after two years, purchasing the expensive version of Dragonflight, and I just don’t have capacity for endless trial-and-error troubleshooting. I was hoping WoW would be more respectful of my time with Dragonflight, but it’s not off to a good start…

Update 1:

Tried these, with no luck…

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