Turns out the game is an Alternate Timeline where the Heroes win against Calamity Ganon! Furthermore Calamity Ganon’s true identity is revealed to be an Alternate Future version of Zelda’s Childhood Toy named Terrako which she created!
How did the thing become Calamity Ganon shrouding itself in Pig-like Malice? Probably got infected by it’s future self!
As for the Ganon the Guardians were built to defeat… He’s obviously the Ganondorf from Breath of the Wild’s Sequel!
Ironic how the evil Fortune Teller(he’s revealed to be evil and working for Calamity Ganon in Age of Calamity) convinced Hyrule to excavate a bunch of Machines that Calamity Ganon/Terrako was an imitation of so that it could infect them due to remembering it’s future self’s actions!
The Guardians were excavated for the wrong enemy! Instead of being used against the Gerudo King they were built for they were used against a corrupted imitation of themselves that wanted to use them to ravage Hyrule!
Welcome back, Miss Izzy. I have some vodka to put in that coffee if you want it. I may even have some Inferno Punch… Somewhere… It’s been awhile since I’ve emptied my bags so I don’t know if I still have that or not…
Morning everyone. Today, I think I’m getting Chinese Food! Shimmies I have work soon…and so sleepy…Must…sleep… dozes, sausage egg and cheese croissant on plate, faceplants sammich and passed out