It’s a sunny day in Azeroth, when suddenly…
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Dalaran loses its magic because the head mage falls asleep and it falls into the ocean!
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The drop causes a massive tsunami that drowns Suramar City, causing much rejoicing.
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Until, from below the newly deeper depths, a dark shape breaches the surface of the roiling sea.
It’s the mighty CAMPFIRE, risen to the surface world to begin its terrible reign of terror upon Azeroth!
A sphere of umbral properties waning.
The campfire advances upon the shore of Suramar.
Since than, Azeroth never faces such a powerful foe not since the days of …
… the infinite time-campfire!
Suramar is finally deleted from the game.
CAMPFIRE then levels its terrible porpoise cannons directly at Dalaran floating serenely overhead and /yells “ONLY WHEN THE STREETS OF DALARAN ARE ALIVE WITH PORPOISE-SONG WILL I REST! GET PORPOISED!” and begins its onslaught!
a flying bovine conjured by someone, crashes into Stormwind explodes causing a massive spread of mad cow disease.
Each cow transforms into Gamon, who will truly save us!!!
Gamon opens a portal to the realm of the Cow King, and we finally have a proper Diablo crossover event
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From the portal walks out Bolvar snorting a bunch of soul ash and laughing proclaiming that a Diablo Crossover will never happen.
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Bolvar’s soul ash fueled mockery causes The Cow King to suddenly burst into irrelevance, and run away screaming.
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Shadowlands 2.0 has been announced and worse than ever
Bobby Kotick watches from afar laughing on his new Yacht, at how gullible players are. Knowing even if the story sucks people will still pay…
Then, The Kottick raises his gnarled hand into the air and makes a hateful fist to the heavens, for he knows that soon, the cosmic army he built with his vast riches will become IRL Burning Legion and bring about the Warcraft universe for realsies you guys!
But then, someone bonks him on the head and he has amnesia, forgetting that Shadowlands ever existed