For every idiot in the game, there’s a kind person as well. It can be difficult to find them, but they’re worth seeking out. Try looking for guilds that are social or new player friendly. They’re going to be nicer to interact with by nature. If you can’t find any on your current server, there’s an entire thread here with a couple hundred guilds listed in it.
My suggestion is to get in with a good group of people and then turn all of the unnecessary chats off.
As far as pug group content goes, it never hurts to let them know from the rip that you’re new to the content and learning. It tends to get people in a more helpful (or at least less toxic) mood. It’s helpful to remember that most people assume that everyone else in the group is a veteran, so the reminder to them that not everyone is can be a benefit a lot of times.
That said, if a group feels someone is holding them back, they are within their rights to vote kick that person. The system isn’t perfect, but it is what it is. Running with guildies is the best way to eliminate that potential.