Am I the jerk here?

Community General Discussion
1

Ok I queued up for Normal Sanctum of Domination, the group I joined was on the Eye. Now I been trying to clear normal on my alts since I am jobless, got plenty of free time, and currently retired from FFXIV until Endwalker since I completed everything (Yes its possible). I was on my Bear Druid if that matters, item level 222.

So I join the group and they put out a Cauldron and Feast. Then I notice this group has a bunch of members in the same guild. I thought cool, a guild group, probably lost a tank tonight so I thought cool, i’ll tank this for them, maybe we’ll kill Sylvanas and I can requeue for Terragrue and Eye later. Oh sweet summer child… no… no no no.

Normally I zone out on my druid when im tanking cause no offense to the other tanking classes, as I play them all, druid is pretty mindless. Swipe, Thrash, use Barkskin on Cooldown with the Legendary power, taunt swap, repeat. Then I noticed this was the 4th taunt swap on 3 stacks…and the adds were still 50% hp. Then I noticed… I was 3rd on the damage doing 3.3k dps.

Noooo this isn’t right, they must be saving their cooldowns, or something… but nope, half the dps, their biggest attack was AUTOATTACKS. Well, we wipe when Skyja comes down and they scramble with the Fragments mechanic as no one groups up, it just keeps spreading, the damage gets overwhelming, hell, even I had it at one point.

Now, I am a FFXIV and wow Veteren, but lately, FFXIV has been overwriting my natural tendency to be a Jagoff, so I offer to raid lead and teach them what to do, figuring if I kill The Nine, I can join another group down the line to do the rest of the bosses. Next pull… the dps stand in the group with the Giant purple circles, the off tank pulls the boss back INTO the shield… wipe to fragments again.

Third wipe, I explain what went wrong, what not to do and well… they did the exact same mistakes again. Finally, I lost my cool, Im a 3 strikes kinda person and I felt like I was wasting my time for people unwilling to listen so I said “sorry, im out”

I get whispers calling me an A**hole, and other colorful insults, some accusing me of being an elitist and such and I responded, before I put them on ignore, that I joined to do Normal mode, but for them, LFR would be more their speed.

Was I the Jerk here?

3 Likes
2

I always feel like if the answer was No then the person asking would’ve just moved on confidently with their day and wouldn’t have felt the need to write up a big post about it. So yeah you were probably a jerk

That said I don’t see anything wrong in what you posted, so I dunno

2 Likes
3

For a pug, 3 strike rule is good enough for me. I don’t’ think you were a jerk at all

6 Likes
4

Denpends what you responded with here lol. But no based on the rest probably not. If you were polite up to and including when you removed yourself then that’s all good Imo

5

You peaced out abruptly without a friendly goodbye, good luck. That’s a pretty jerky thing to do.

6

Nope

7

As others have said, three strike rule is pretty good. Don’t take their insults personally, if they’re getting that worked up to DM you garbage like that then they prob aren’t doing too well themselves.

There’s a lot of misdirected anger in this playerbase.

8

It entire depends on how you offered advice, and how you left.

“Sorry I’m out” isn’t a overly kind reply, but after a third wipe and a kind explanation of mechanics, it’s definitely not a mean one.

If you were rude then yeah. Based on this? Probably not.

9

Hard to tell. It depends on how you communicated.

Given your self admitted jagoff tendencies I’m somewhat skeptical.

Only you really know the whole story so I think you know the answer.

10

Yes you’re a dh

1 Like
11

(my emphasis)

Ummm…back at ya

12

Didn’t read anything except for the title I’m just going to say yes

13

You were more patient than most.

14

They have no power over your stay.

You can leave for any and all reasons.

And any colorful insults are an easy report.

lmao.

15

This is some of those most faulty logic I’ve read in a good minute.

16

It doesn’t matter if you were a jerk tbh, that “Guild group” put there selves in queue to enlist the time of outsiders all while not respecting the time of those they brought in.

if you joined their guild and did that knowing what they were then sure you would be the problem in the situation.

but no its them trying to enlist better players while not being willing to step up themselves.

you did the right thing, don’t overwork yourself so they can do nothing and get free loot.

17

Lol, you have knack for relaying a story and it was a good read, I enjoyed it and had to chuckle. You seem like a pretty awesome person - I’d say definitely a big fat NO you were not the jerk in said situation lol.

18

they’re either really good or just dreadful, there’s rarely a middle ground with guild groups in lfg

19

There are many tanks that would have dropped group mid pull if they saw themselves near the top of the damage meter.

You could been more generous, and you could have been far less so. They could have thanked you for trying. They didn’t. The title of jerk goes to them imho.

20

nah but it is bad to join pugs whether guild or not this late i had some crazy groups at end of few raids i did thru the yrs when doing stuff late heck the next patch should be here. its just random people going thru having fun to themselves you are way more serious than them obviously.