But how else do you attract attention?
Stereotype(and not exactly baseless) of gaming community is that it’s filled with lonely, horny guys, that will worship any woman like queen.
It can be fun, if you enjoy drama and constant fights over everything.
Dude, yes. XD I just talked about this yesterday, but I call it “Queen Bee Syndrome.” (And before anyone calls me a sexist, I’m a woman as well. lol)
Some women cannot function with other women in a guild/group and see them as some sort of “rivals.” Having been a guild leader in WoW for a few years, it drove me insane.
My sister was one of those women, so every time we’d get a new lady recruit, she’d find something to complain about, and try to turn everyone against her, etc. She also flirted with the men and has had several men send her money IRL. It’s stupid.
Anyway, I do find that tomboy-ish women aren’t bad for this at all, and when I look back at the close girl friends I’ve had in games, that’s a noticeable trend. I’m masculine myself, and nearly all the other women I’ve been close with have been as well.
I’m not trying to stereotype or say all feminine women can’t be friendly in this situation (obviously lol). I’m just saying this trait seems more common in them from my very anecdotal experience. 
I am bad at many things and good at others, but one thing I’ve always been excellent at is guild leadership.
And feminism. The real kind where I don’t ask for equality or demand special treatment, I just am equal. Other women like me will know exactly what I mean. Guys call me ‘bro’ half the time. Whatever.
In my 20 years of gaming I’ve only met a few guys who were actually like that, at least in my circle of friends. But I always played highly competitive pvp games like Dark Age of Camelot and then eventually moved on to do progression raiding and Arena both in WoW and led one of the most notorious and feared pvp guilds in Star Wars: The Old Republic (I’ve since retired from pvp in that game and only play it to roleplay).
There was never really any room for flirting in that kind of environment, which was one reason why a lot of the other females who would try out or join my guilds wouldn’t make it past their probationary period, not because the guys were lonely and horny, but because these girls would come in and act inappropriately and draw the focus away from the goals we were trying to achieve.
Of course not all women were like this and I did have a few who came in and stayed for a good long while and then left for reasons unrelated to drama. Honestly I was just a very strict guild leader when it came to things like that. If they wanted to flirt with the guys when we weren’t undertaking a guild activity like pvp or raiding that was one thing (unless the guys complained to me about it, in which case I would take action), but extraneous chatter during raids or pvp was detrimental for the kind of competitive environment I fostered.
I do not. I just want to play the game and accomplish our goals as a team. Yes, I met my boyfriend (and the one I was with before him) in a video game. But our relationships developed in ‘after hours’ voice chat and doing things like daily quests and non-competitive activities.
This is going to sound catty but… yeah that doesn’t fly with me. I’m not the queen bee, but I am the alpha wolf. You see that little tag next to my name? That’s right, it says guildmaster.
I have rules and I enforce them, regardless of the violator’s gender. There is no one-upping me because I do not care about your (general you not personal :p) weird and frankly, narcissistic desire to have all men worship at your altar. There’s no competing with me because this is not a competition. These guys are not my boyfriends, they are my friends and my team, and they play with me because my focus is the game and not what’s in their pants.
Ugh.
Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.
I always gave every woman a chance if they wanted to try to be part of the team. Hell, I would hold back from booting them or referring them to the guild rules because I didn’t want to be seen as if I was being harsher on the women than I was the men (I was not). Unfortunately that’s sexism having its way with me.
Same. I have made some lasting, enduring friendships with other women through games, even went to my friend from Australia’s wedding when she had it at Disney World in Florida a few years ago. Gorgeous wedding and it was great to be able to hang out with her IRL even if it was only for a few minutes at a time haha.
It is, and I genuinely don’t know why. I could delve into psychology and the need for validation but I also don’t want to make it seem like I think being a girly girl is a mental defect, lmao.
They’ll do this to a woman who gives them attention (ie, speaks to them more than once), while also making it clear how much they hate most women for this, that, and the other. That is misogyny.
They don’t actually think women are queens lol. Women are just a conquest to them, and they become very disposable once the guy finally realises that anything sexual is off the table.
It happens with people who are probably lonely and isolated – then they get horny when suddenly meeting a girl online.
One of my acquaintances in this is a DPS player, masters I think, and he was duo-boosting his female friend (they talked to each other via Discord) from plat for free. When I asked why would he do it because it’s essentially a form of simping if you two don’t date IRL – he answered that he just felt super lonely, and the girl was super friendly and gentle, so he just couldn’t resist simping in a form of free boosting. He said he was somewhat happy to finally have somebody to talk to frequently, and that even though she refused to meet him IRL, she was very friendly and sometimes flirtatious. I guess loneliness does this to people.
Situations like this can create a stereotype that ALL girl players are boosted, when it’s wrong. It’s just a lonely guy who is good at the game wants a chance to obtain a female companionship (even virtual one) by his skill. Like by being rich or famous IRL, or like when in a prehistoric time some men would court women by bringing them meat from animals they killed during hunt. Instinct to attract a mate by giving her resources and showing her your prowess (even if this relationship doesn’t move from online to real life – although sometimes it does).
You have this wrong. Entirely wrong.
It’s just a narcissistic woman who wants to use her sexuality and gender to manipulate a man into giving her something. She looks for and preys on vulnerable, lonely men, flirting occasionally to keep their interest up, all the while having no interest in them beyond what type of assistance in game they can give her so that she will then be able to turn around and do this to another guy who is more skilled at the game than the first guy. She will repeat this ad-nauseam as long as she can so that she has the appearance of being a skilled gamer, but in reality she is far lower ranked or skilled than it would seem.
You’re blaming the victim here.
I don’t think it’s right to claim that the men are entirely without blame here.
Would you say the same thing if it was a man using emotions to manipulate a woman into giving him things?
Well, maybe it’s true, but they both were quite happy with it, so I guess it was consesual pseudo-relationship?
Some angry people may call you a misogynist or an incel for this post, but it’s true that women are just as capable of abuse as men are. But I guess in this case there was no actual emotional abuse, merely consensual exploitation.
But was he really happy? Or did she take advantage of his depression and loneliness?
I’m a woman. A straight, cis woman. I’m also a feminist. I always say that when you’re examining a situation like this, you have to look at it both ways.
Would you be okay with a man doing this to a woman? If not, then you can’t be okay with a woman doing it to a man.
There is a certain… i guess you could call her a pop artist or rap artist or… something that exists and released a song this past year that I found, frankly, disgusting, but that a lot of other women wanted to call some kind of anthem of empowerment. They act as if this woman is some kind of goddess or idol to be looked up to. She is cheered and celebrated all over social media. She has high-paying endorsement contracts with a major American product.
This same woman admitted to drugging and robbing men while she worked as a prostitute.
If she were a man, she’d be demonized at every given opportunity.
This is why I say you must always examine for double standard.
In this context, I would.
From my personal experience, I have been asked by men to let them carry me for online lewd favours. I’m not the sort of woman to give in to that, so naturally I declined, but my point is that the men generally aren’t these poor, lost souls who are hopelessly in online love.
Frenzy said it best - It’s consensual exploitation. There are a lot of men on the internet, particularly in gaming, who don’t actually care about women beyond everything between her legs. If she didn’t show interest, fake or not, he would toss her aside and wait for someone who does.
I’m sure there are some instances in which there are women who do emotionally manipulate genuinely needy men, but I have had enough experiences to know that it isn’t always the case.
Right. I have had this offer too. Like you, I declined.
The girl in Frenzy’s case did not decline. She knew that she had someone she could use, and did so.
Well no, not all of them are, but in the case of what Frenzy is talking about, that is exactly the case.
Which doesn’t make it right. Emotional manipulation is still emotional manipulation, even if the guy knows he’s being manipulated. Maybe that makes it even worse, because here we have a guy who is so depressed and lonely that he’s willing to be walked all over. He needs therapy and a real friend.
Of course there are, and they are just as much jerks as the chick who uses a lonely guy’s heart to get somewhere in a video game.
Well of course it isn’t, but it does happen, and it’s not right.
The worst part about it too, is that men are conditioned to believe that if this happens to them, then they should just suck it up or they deserve it, and so they don’t even reach out for help when they need it because they think they’re just going to get laughed at.
As a woman I can feel that, deeply, because that’s the way WE are treated a lot of the time when someone hurts US. Mutual exploitation or not, in the case of what Frenzy is talking about, it is the MAN in this situation who has a mental illness (depression) and instead of trying to actually help him, she used that mental illness to get something out of it.
We’d tear a dude apart for doing that to a woman instead of having the decency to say “hey this isn’t right what I’m doing to you”, come on…
(deleted, too much information)
Where did Frenzy imply that the woman in this scenario was merely toying with his friend? It sounds to me like she just didn’t want to meet some random man she met on the internet, and I don’t blame her.
I disagree - If both parties are content with the arrangement, that’s all that matters. We don’t have to line it, and saying that someone is just too lonely and depressed to make good decisions for themselves in this particular context is a bit of a cop-out, honestly.
We can both agree that those sorts of men do need therapy, however.
In Frenzy’s instance, however, it wasn’t like the woman was telling his friend that she loved him and would meet him in person if he carried her. Unless there’s been some ommitted information, but from what Frenzy has said I can’t agree that she’s the “manipulative female” MGTOW-aligned men often discuss.
To be fair, nobody is taken very seriously in the realm of online relationships.
I could be really candid with you about my thoughts when it comes to men who open themselves up to these situations, but I would rather keep my account. But once again, there is no insinuation that this woman manipulated Frenzy’s friend in any capacity!
Perhaps some would. I, personally, would not. I would likely take a very similar approach to my current one.
Every single one of these situations needs context, and it depends on who initiated things, etc.
I do think women who purposely exploit men for items or money are bad people. (Like my sister -_-) Like if they set out with that intention from the get-go. And they do exist, and it’s awful. But if a guy keeps offering gifts, especially if the woman has been very clear she has no interest in the guy and such, then she’s really not morally obligated to decline. Also especially if she’s under the impression the gifts are now from a friendship-only stance.
I would still decline, and have done so, but you can’t call her a terrible person if she doesn’t.
And onto the other side of the coin - we gotta be real for a second; men who offer to carry girls in games and such are often not interested in the girl for emotional reasons. They’re interested in her for … well, “other” reasons. So that behavior comes off as a little cringe / creepy to me. Especially when they do it in the way that, like … they do something nice for her, then guilt her into giving them “something” in return, if you know what I mean.
So yeah, both sides can be wrong in these arrangements. Context really matters.
Yo the amount of thirst in this thread alone is amazing
I got sucked into an activity with the boyfriend so I can’t actually reply to everything right now (I will eventually), but I do not recognize this acronym?
MGTOW: Men Going Their Own Way
They claim to be men who have been routinely screwed over by “the manipulative female”, so have decided to give up on women for the foreseeable future. I think another term for them is “black-pilled”? They’re the general population of MRA groups.
Either way, they are some of the most misogynistic and awful men on the internet. I happen to be someone who is very critical of the current state of Feminism, however MGTOW shouldn’t be ignored. Search up “MGTOW Compilations” on YouTube and if the videos aren’t bad enough, read the comments. I remember once seeing a video of a man punching this drunk woman in the face (I believe she was out cold after that) because she touched his arm, and that was back when I was actually quite sympathetic to the movement…Let’s just say my sympathy died that day.
I won’t lie, there aren’t many things on the internet that make me irrationally angry than MGTOWs trying to justify why men should be allowed to hit women. MGTOW is the denial stage of inceldom.
Oh no… I take it back bkfkhfkhgkhgfkhfgkh 
Attention from guys is attention from guys. Even if they eventually figure things out, there are still many more.
Call it “simp conquest”, if you want, as whole “conquest” thing works in both directions.
Loneliness isn’t for everyone. As someone, who never had more than 1 real friend at any time, I know it too well.