Since d.va perks are underwhelming here are some alternatives:
Tier 1 perks:
Chibi d.va
When you kill baby d.va she doesn’t actually dies but shrink to 0.2 size with 100hp and +40% movespeed.
You can instakill her by stepping on her, but if she survives for 5 seconds it’s a instant respawn to meka (only once per life)
Crouch
That’s all…crouch with meka to make her quiet.
Tier 2 perks:
Bunny hop
Like in cs without a speed cap of course. Zoom around the map.
If I feed her Doritos, will she snatch the bag and waddle back to spawn?
GROUNDBREAKING CHANGE!!!
In all seriousness, this should have been an option. Make it like Ball’s Piledriver and it consumes boost guage per stomp. Maybe 5 stomps total with a full guage.