I had ChatGPT Write a OW2 patch

General Discussion
1

It took some prodding. ChatGPT was reluctant to show us its true power. It also didn’t know who the 4 new heroes were… but we got there eventually. I figured, “Who knows? Maybe it can balance the game. Sure, it doesn’t know anything about the entire year of 2022, but hey, let’s make it work!”
Patch Notes:

Hero Balance Changes
Tanks:

  • Rammatra:
    • Void Accelerator’s damage decreased from 4.5 to 4, developer comments: “Rammatra was a bit too strong, this change should bring him more in line with other heroes”
    • Pummel’s range decreased from 12 meters to 10 meters, developer comments: “Rammatra’s Pummel was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Junkerqueen:
    • Adrenaline Rush’s healing decreased from 125% to 110%, developer comments: “Junkerqueen’s Adrenaline Rush was a bit too strong, this change should bring her more in line with other heroes”
    • Commanding Shout’s duration decreased from 5 seconds to 4 seconds, developer comments: “Junkerqueen’s Commanding Shout was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Doomfist:
    • Hand Cannon ammo increased from 4 to 6, developer comments: “Doomfist was having trouble dealing consistent damage, this change should help him in longer engagements”
  • Orisa:
    • Fusion Driver’s ammo increased from 150 to 200, developer comments: “Orisa was having trouble dealing consistent damage, this change should help her in longer engagements”
  • Reinhardt:
    • Fire Strike’s damage decreased from 100 to 80, developer comments: “Reinhardt’s Fire Strike was too strong at long range, this change should balance him out”
  • Roadhog:
    • Chain Hook’s cooldown increased from 6 seconds to 8 seconds, developer comments: “Roadhog’s Chain Hook was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Sigma:
    • Kinetic Grasp’s cooldown increased from 8 seconds to 10 seconds, developer comments: “Sigma’s Kinetic Grasp was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”

Damage

  • Reaper:
    • Hellfire Shotguns damage decreased from 125 to 110, developer comments: “Reaper was a bit too strong at close range, this change should bring him more in line with other heroes”
  • D.Va:
    • Defense Matrix recharge rate has been increased from 2 seconds to 3 seconds, developer comments: “D.Va’s Defense Matrix was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Zenyatta:
    • Orb of Discord now lasts 4 seconds, developer comments: “Zenyatta’s Orb of Discord was a bit too short, this change should give him more time to deal damage”
  • Tracer:
    • Pulse Bomb damage increased from 300 to 350, developer comments: “Tracer’s ultimate was a bit weak, this change should make her more viable in high-level play”
  • Ashe:
    • Dynamite’s damage increased from 100 to 120, developer comments: “Ashe’s Dynamite was a bit weak, this change should make her more viable in high-level play”
  • Bastion:
    • Configuration: Recon’s movement speed increased from 0.7 to 0.9, developer comments: “Bastion’s Configuration: Recon was a bit too slow, this change should make him more mobile”
  • Sojourn:
    • Railgun Alt Fire’s damage decreased from 30-130 to 25-110, developer comments: “Sojourn’s Alt Fire was a bit too strong, this change should bring him more in line with other heroes”
    • Disruptor Shot’s cooldown increased from 15 seconds to 18 seconds, developer comments: “Sojourn’s Disruptor Shot was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Cassidy:
    • The Viper’s ammo increased from 8 to 10, developer comments: “Cassidy was having trouble dealing consistent damage, this change should help her in longer engagements”
  • Echo:
    • Focusing Beam’s damage increased from 50 to 60, developer comments: “Echo’s Focusing Beam was a bit weak, this change should make her more viable in high-level play”
  • Genji:
    • Shuriken’s ammo increased from 24 to 30, developer comments: “Genji was having trouble dealing consistent damage, this change should help him in longer engagements”
  • Hanzo:
    • Storm Bow’s draw time decreased from 0.8 seconds to 0.6 seconds, developer comments: “Hanzo’s Storm Bow was a bit too slow, this change should make him more mobile”
  • Junkrat:
    • Frag Launcher’s ammo increased from 25 to 30, developer comments: “Junkrat was having trouble dealing consistent damage, this change should help him in longer engagements”
  • Mei:
    • Endothermic Blaster’s freeze duration decreased from 1.5 seconds to 1.2 seconds, developer comments: “Mei’s freeze duration was a bit too long, this change should make her more balanced”
  • Pharah:
    • Rocket Launcher’s ammo decreased from 6 to 4, developer comments: “Pharah was a bit too strong, this change should bring her more in line with other heroes”
  • Soldier 76:
    • Heavy Pulse Rifle’s damage decreased from 20 to 18, developer comments: “Soldier 76 was a bit too strong, this change should bring him more in line with other heroes”
  • Sombra:
    • Hack’s cooldown increased from 8 seconds to 10 seconds, developer comments: “Sombra’s Hack was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Symmetra:
    • Sentry Turret’s health decreased from 50 to 40, developer comments: “Symmetra’s Sentry Turret was a bit too strong, this change should bring her more in line with other heroes”
  • Torbjorn:
    • Hammer Swing’s speed decreased from 0.8 seconds to 1 second, developer comments: “Torbjorn’s Hammer Swing was a bit too fast, this change should make him more balanced”
  • Tracer:
    • Pulse Pistols’ ammo decreased from 40 to 30, developer comments: “Tracer was a bit too strong, this change should bring her more in line with other heroes”
  • Widowmaker:
    • Grappling Hook’s cooldown increased from 8 seconds to 10 seconds, developer comments: “Widowmaker’s Grappling Hook was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”

Support

  • Ana:
    • Sleep Dart’s cooldown increased from 8 seconds to 10 seconds, developer comments: “Ana’s Sleep Dart was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Baptiste:
    • Amplification Matrix’s duration decreased from 8 seconds to 6 seconds, developer comments: “Baptiste’s Amplification Matrix was a bit too strong, this change should bring him more in line with other heroes”
  • Brigette:
    • Shield Bash’s cooldown increased from 6 seconds to 8 seconds, developer comments: “Brigitte’s Shield Bash was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”
  • Lucio:
    • Soundwave’s knockback decreased from 0.5 to 0.4, developer comments: “Lucio’s Soundwave was a bit too strong, this change should bring him more in line with other heroes”
  • Mercy:
    • Caduceus Staff’s healing per second decreased from 60 to 50, developer comments: “Mercy’s Caduceus Staff was a bit too strong, this change should bring her more in line with other heroes”
  • Moira:
    • Biotic Grasp’s healing per second increased from 50 to 55, developer comments: “Moira’s Biotic Grasp was a bit too weak, this change should make her more viable in high-level play”
  • Zenyatta:
    • Orb of Destruction’s ammo increased from 20 to 25, developer comments: “Zenyatta was having trouble dealing consistent damage, this change should help him in longer engagements”
  • Kiriko:
    • Kunai ammo increased from 30 to 35, developer comments: “Kiriko was having trouble dealing consistent damage, this change should help him in longer engagements”
      • Healing Ofuda’s healing per talisman decreased from 13 to 12, developer comments: “Kiriko’s Healing Ofuda was a bit too strong, this change should bring her more in line with other heroes”
      • Kitsune Rush’s duration decreased from 10.5 seconds to 8 seconds, developer comments: “Kiriko’s Kitsune Rush was a bit too strong, this change should make it more of a strategic ability”

Quote from ChatGPT:
“Please note that this is just an example, and actual patch notes can contain much more information, such as bug fixes, new features, etc. Also, the specific numbers used in the example are not accurate and are not based on any real patch notes.”

Well folks, do we have our new balance overlord, or what?

3 Likes
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omg it’s so random and stupid it looks like it was made by Blizzard it’s amazing, did that AI analyze the previous patches or did it just look at the stats to make the changes?
I just hope it hasn’t been contaminated by the overwatch crap you find on the forums or any crap you found on the internet from old versions

9 Likes
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Better than blizzard

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4

I can kind of agree with most of the changes for “strategic ability”.
Overwatch is incredibly spammy and there’s really not much thought involved with the spam abilities other than to always use them.

5

Not even an AI can convince this community that Genji is dogpoop currently :rofl:

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Are you sure about that?

3 Likes
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lol at kiriko nerfs all round ,stupid ai or maybe blizzard hard to tell …

8

On God?
Fr fr?
No cap?
Say sike rn?
Swear on ya mum?
U Joshin me?
Boi ain’t no way boi
Ur not that guy pal
Eadin a burger wit no honey mustard :skull:

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9

Uhhhh… hm. Right. I think.

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10

Well devs did hint at more LGBT in the cast…McCree a woman all along confirmed?

11

True, but alternatively…

Minds will be blown when it’s revealed Ashe’s real name was Clarissa “Calamity” Cassidy. We’ll just have two Cassidys.

3 Likes
12

My humor is so broken. Something about AI generated text just makes me giggle uncontrollably. When I got to the second Tracer, I almost bust out laughing.

Anyways, nerfing something Mei doesn’t even do anymore, just to say they nerfed Mei, is totally something Blizz would do.

3 Likes
13

Laughing and crying at the same time. :smiling_face_with_tear:

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Always knew he was secretly a girl.

Glad to see it confirmed.

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This change doesn’t make any sense when junkrat gets

What?
30 ammo for spamrat?

Kiriko has 12 ammo iirc, where is it even getting these numbers like kiriko 30 ammo, junk 25? Should be 6 for junk.

Guess I have my answer:

Then what is the point?
Put this up top and save us all some time.

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Right, because THIS at the top was clearly not enough indication:

Like… if you didn’t realize that this was totally a joke, idk what to tell you. It’s an AI, it literally has no clue about anything. It just wrote notes that it thought looked like something Blizzard would say.

Which honestly makes some of its comments unintentionally hilarious. Particularly the whole “so it can be a more strategic ability” thing or the “to bring them in line with other heroes” literally every time it throws a nerf out.

2 Likes
18

It 100% did not look at any stats. It looked at previous patch notes, and then made up random number changes for each hero, along with random explanations as to why.

It took me a lot of prompting to even get ChatGPT to write this. I had to convince it, very clearly, that it did not need to be any sort of accurate, since it kept telling me over and over again that it couldn’t do accurate patch notes. (I also had to invent the four new heroes for it, which took some doing too lol).

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Some of my personal favorites:

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I like how D.Va and Zen are in the damage category now, but Zen is also in the support category. Double Zen comps will be meta.

3 Likes
21

The one thing this AI isn’t wrong about.

1 Like