Game: Corrupt-a-wish

granted, but soldier has to ride a bike during flight

I wish I can get to a good college

Granted. But every viable GOATS counter is nerfed and lets it run wild again.

I wish the devs actually listened to its community.

granted. but they only listened to me.

i wish people would stop complaining about mercy

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Granted. Now they’re complaining about Brigitte.

I do wish that there were active mentors in this game.

Granted. They’re opposite genders and you have halibut. Unfortunately, they all ended up in some questionable careers and your halibut was recalled due to someone injecting a poison before the product was shipped to market.

I do wish that I won the lottery.

granted. but you can only spend your money on more lottery tickets

i wish that mei was thiccer

granted. but they removed her from the playable heroes.

I wish I could actually hit and kill the enemies I shoot at

Granted. Unfortunately, you took your time aiming. That was just enough for Widowmaker to get her headshot on you. Gotta be a bit quicker than that.

I do wish that we could use the character’s voices to transmit our own communications between team members.

Granted but you can only use bastions voice.

I wish Ariana Grande would come to Australia next year

Granted, she comes and plays her biggest shows ever. Then in all of her interviews she trashes the whole country and everybody in it, saying next time they should just send her the money and save her a trip.

I wish the ice cream fountain at my Palace had another 100 flavors.

Granted. However, they’re all either merely inedible or downright poisonous.

I do wish that they’d let us create our own Overwatch characters.

Granted, but you can’t play them.

I wish I could play them.

Granted, but you will be only able to play them in the practice range

I wish that the range has an overhaul

Granted. But the practice range now takes place with My Lil Pony characters.

I wish Blizzard would release 2 characters at a time.

Granted, but one character is unplayable in comp

I wish for this to never end

Wish granted, but this Corrupt-a-Wish is the supposed Overwatch 2.0.

I wish Mercy players wouldn’t complain about everything–

Wish granted. Mercy is now buffed to have mass Rez on E, with no slowdown.

I wish for more wishes

Granted, but the wishes turn into a loss streak, 10 seasons long

I wish you would make a wish already.

Granted, they wished you would change your battletag to monkeybutt

I wish that other person had picked a better batletag for you.