You can easily spot a premade the moment there’s mismatch with roles between teams. None of these players have done anything to be publicly shamed but they each almost have as many matches recorded with five-stack than I have in total.
Surprisingly such a team enjoys only 75-80% success rate. When solo queued they’re beneath if not barely above 50% with the exception of one guy at 60% solo, but he has been playing a single hero for most of the game’s existence and it can’t be too hard to shot call with a group of warm bodies that offer amazing synergy.
We have opened with a huge lead in the laning phase and it carried us for most of the match but their amount of CC will win every boss fight and if you don’t suicide on the capture point, you’ve just postponed the inevitable because the Golem is too strong at 20+ minutes to defend against with 2 or potentially 3 players hard disabled.
There are much more annoying teams around but this one didn’t skip on most of the necessary steps such as scouting or covering for other players while performing various tasks. They followed the checklist for a team at a disadvantage to the letter and didn’t even cheese the towers at start so they’re probably short on confidence to brute force their way to victory (until late game at least).
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Thanks to the Tychus on one my SL game. He seemed to be a smurf but surely he was helpful in the game and tried to give advice. That’s was great!
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To the ARAM Chromie who didn’t say anything the entire game while the Khara/Auriel and Butcher whined at each other for like 10 minutes straight, meanwhile you put up MVP numbers: gg, and thanks for the actual carry. 
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But Sami cheated: he played Li-Ming.
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in each game I play where theirs either a fast way to get a thing via using real money or you can grind to get it there is always one hero
for example in For honor I played for 3 weeks no stop to get enough for the Zhanhu they were then my main for most of my time playing that game
In Heroes I brought Whitemane with my gold cus eh why the hell not
I haven’t spent a single penny on this hoe and I didn’t intend to change
I grinded away to get the witch skin (only to get it in the halloween chest 100 shards off before I could afford it) once the galactic skins became available I grinded for that
my most recent endevour was the silver screen showstopper skin
“Dory this gotta be in you collection pronto”
I tell you now
it hits different it’s like the burning desire to play her has been reborn
it was absolute torture to get it but it was the best “purchase” I’ve done in a loooooooong time
Edit: now the game is giving me quests that mean I cant play whitemane why does this game hate me so 
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I wanted to player healer. Ya know, support my teammates, catch em as they fall, be the good samaratan. Step back, not be a DPS hog, not play as Sylvanas/Kel’Thuzad/Valla/Valeera or any other hero I am reasonably good at in creating corpses. But to be on the safe side…
Readies as Kharazim
Teammates: Nah, you gonna be throwin’ hands and tankin’.
But I don’t want to–
Bots: SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT!
No, I would much rather hea–
Dragonshrine Announcer: TROUBLED IS IN THE BOTTOM SHRINE! ALL BOTS, GOT GET EM!
Alright, fine, after I meditate ya’ll be catchin’ these healing hands. At least I won’t get MV–
…eh. It was a good game. I had fun.
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https://i.imgur.com/Ppaml7P.png
In contrast to my adventures in salt just to show what is possible when randoms fully respect your calls and pings. I have covered the top bar out of habit but I am not in a party.
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Shooting fish in a healing circle I see…
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Image of GriM
I see there are quite a lot of death in each side. Would be intersting to know if you had a comeback after they started to follow your calls or if they followed since the start.
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At what moment would you personally start listening to me? I was talking with a bit of sarcasm as I always do when I mentioned having an obedient team.
Would it be the start of the game after seeing a single player 2000 levels more than everyone else combined, the moment you noticed that you essentially have a player with a maphack on your team or 25 minutes later after all their predictions of enemy actions and movements came true?
Illidan immediately goes offline (eventually returns) and I decided to babysit him so our opponents wouldn’t notice he was missing. While I am still waiting to throw out my initial owl 10 seconds into the match, three of my guys are already frantically pinging why I am not with them. Such is the caliber of people I am dealing with here.
https://i.imgur.com/TL9x6rb.png
This is the situation 14min into the game. I started an ogre camp because there was nothing better to do while waiting for the objective but everyone else was conveniently on the bottom end of the map so they took a nearby Fort. No complaints so far. While they were around the bruiser camp Murky was dead for 10 more sec. They don’t take it for some odd reason and run into enemy team so they catch and kill Lili.
After a slightly less than ideal sequence of events, we are presented with an opportunity to end the match in the next 60 seconds. Instead of LISTENING to stop they are baited into chasing, they gets Diablo who is resurrected immediately but we lose a lot of time including the 3rd Seed.
While all of this is happening I am frantically pinging for them to stop whatever they’re doing because of the giant death ball forming in our top lane and had I decided to join the team fight we would have risked losing a Keep if not half health on the Core. Me being there would serve as nothing but an encouragement booster for our guys to waste even more time over nothing that would serve us. Clearing the lane took an eternity because I didn’t have Starfall. I wasn’t doing much damage either because I had grabbed so much aggro that I was losing half of my attack uptime avoiding boulders and catapult attacks.
https://i.imgur.com/k8kOmQF.png
This is 24min into the match. Enemy team had just forced the plants down the lanes and only a moment ago three of them were on the inner circle of our base with everyone but Stitches and me dead for another 30 sec. It didn’t have to come to this, but this is the cause of staggering death timers.
It goes on for a while longer and now comes the real OK BOSS WE LISTEN. It is anyone’s game, might even say in favor of the enemy team because Murky and Diablo essentially have no resurrect cooldowns anymore. We collect 2/3 and I manage to restrain everyone so we don’t lose the game to overconfidence. Illidan captures the last Seed and the game is over (coincidentally catapults are already shooting the core for 20% a hit).
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They were there for a reason. 
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One of the best compilations of HotS gameplay I’ve seen in a long time
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I tell you now
playing whitemane while under the affects of 18+ lquids commonly distributed at parties (I think this doesn’t violate the Terms and conditions)
is the THE MOST fun thing in the world
Ah yes I forgot to zeal a couple of heroes but it was great I nearly had 50K healing and we hadn’t reached lv 10 yet
which either means I’m amazing or they really need to get better at this game
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Entered the one thousand level club with TLV. It was a fun game on Dragonshire.
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High overuse of the same sound effects over and over 
Alright, what do you want to redeem your points for?
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I want a dragonhawk mount to go along with Sylvanas’ Ranger-General skin.
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Not a “GG”, but it’s a good feeling to return after a break and see an upcoming and unexpected balance patch. Likewise, it’s encouraging to see forum activity pick up, mostly due to the last two patches, it shows there are loyal fans out there.
Keep giving out the occasional treats and people will return, even if only briefly.
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I gave candy to so many on October 31. They never came back. Not even a hello.
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Had a game where everyone but one player was a beginner. I admit, I was intoxicated when I said it, but I wrote “protect the rookie!”.
I never seen such teamwork or sacrifice before. The Jaina died a few times, but everyone went through hell and back to make sure they survived when applicable. There was a lot of interference played that I do not think I had ever seen outside of pro plays.
Dunno the scores, states, or whatnot, but we made sure that Jaina had as few deaths as possible against the A.I. Everyone voted form them as well.
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