The Bikini Bandit of Sanctuary
Gertrude was a man of many passions: Diablo 4, skimpy swimwear, and a particularly juvenile game of hide-and-seek he dubbed “Hide the Sausage.” Gertrude had a peculiar love for playing as the Spirit Born class in Diablo 4, and he insisted on running around the jungle clad only in a skimpy bikini.
One sweltering afternoon, Gertrude was deep in Sanctuary, his Spirit Born’s ethereal form shimmering in the sunlight. He’d just discovered a hidden grove, a perfect spot for his game of Hide the Sausage. With a mischievous grin, he stripped down to his bikini, leaving his surprisingly well-toned physique on display.
As Gertrude was about to dive into the undergrowth, a sudden shout pierced the air. “Hey! Watch it there, fella!” A fellow Diablo player, a Barbarian clad in full battle regalia, was staring aghast at Gertrude’s attire.
Gertrude, unperturbed, simply winked and replied, “Just getting ready for the beach, bro. You want in on the game?”
The Barbarian’s face flushed a deep shade of crimson. “N-no thanks! I’ve got some demon slaying to do.” He turned and fled the scene, clearly traumatized by the sight.
Gertrude chuckled and disappeared into the foliage, his laughter echoing through the jungle as he began his search for unsuspecting victims. And so, the Bikini Bandit of Sanctuary continued his quest for fun and mischief, one “sausage” at a time.