I first heard about the divorce orders in bulk form Izzabelle. Thought it was funny and I thought I would up the game and paid the clerk good money to submit 42 divorce orders. I also ask to put the most crazy reasons in. I would create them myself but…
BOOM
I have an evil toaster to fight.
COME AND GET ME OU OLD GOD PIECE OF SCRAP!! YOUR SO BAD AT TOASTING BAGELS THAT THEY TURN SOGGY LIKE WHAT IS BETWEEN YOUR MOMS LEGS!!!
A large roar could be heard following more explosions in the background of an epic fight between a monk and a Old god toaster.
2 Likes
I wish I could quit you Berusein. At least he had the divorce papers prefilled and notirized so I just had to throw them in the mail.
I’m concerned for his mental health though. He was raving about evil possessed toasters and he said that he had to take all my bagels with him as ‘offerings to the old gods’.
Qouldnt kuit Berusein. Chried herself to sleep knightly.
She rudely kept making fun of my name. Told her i was finished with her.
I caught her in bed with JARAXXUS EREDAR LORD OF THE BURNING LEGION…
For those of you who might not know who he is:
1 Like
I got married because I was tired of eating out, cleaning the house, doing the laundry and wearing shabby clothes. I divorced Jinrakh for the very same reasons.”
I swear that humans are multiplying. Do they breed with each other before trying to Branch out to blood elves? Well whatever I hired him a maid and then left him with the keys to my five billion dollar mansion. I don’t use that one anymore; it got too small.
Evidently she’s not into small things.
Free five billion dollar mansion just for me!
1 Like
Apparently my knees just couldn’t keep his attention.
This Gnomer gone to Mechagon to write an abridged version of Gnomer’s SilIiad and the epic battles at the walls of Toy that towered nearly six feet into the sky. Of Helen whose tool kit launched a thousand striders. With the companion piece, the great work called the Oddity, where the hero Odoriferous, clad for 20 years in mechanical armor he can’t take off, is seduced by the C-Nymph Sinusitis after the A- and B- Nymphs banish him with the balm of the elven priestess, Lysol. Ah, the touching scene where he is finally reunited with his steampunk wife, Calliope, when she demurely says to those present, “I’ll need a can opener and a drum of bleach.”
Er… sorry about wandering a bit into the weeds there. /sigh
2 Likes
I have now officially lost count now of the times I’ve divorced Penumbra
2 Likes
Kept going on and on about her ex… Penumbra, Penumbra, Penumbra… I need to find me a good Panderen!
1 Like
She’s not fond of those of us who’ve divorced Penumbrae multiple times…which given her number of posts I asume i’ts most of us.
2 Likes
His misogynistic attitude toward pandaren females was too much!
4 Likes
Unfortunately, I was never able to determine if she was smiling or not under her mask. So many comments I would make either made her either upset or have a fireball cast my way.
After I commented that her sword looked bigger and better than mine, she sheeped me and left me no choice. /sigh
H
3 Likes
Our eyes (one each) met across a crowded room. I was instantly entranced by this handsome elf and his long, silken hair. He didn’t speak common and I don’t speak Thalassian but our lips spoke promises in the language of love.
When I woke up in the morning he was long gone and the only thing left in my bags was a copy of the divorce papers.
5 Likes
I was travelling through Duskwood when Willeiga came out of nowhere. I thought it was going to be a battle between us, her being a Worgen, me a blood elf.
It was love at first bite!
I am not sure who bit who first, but one taste of her and it was all romance. Perhaps we were infatuated with the woods. Perhaps an enchantment came over us. When our heads cleared and we realized a cross faction romance would never work, we said our goodbyes and parted as friends.
I’ll miss her, but it was not meant to be.
4 Likes
It was one of those lovely nights in SIlverpine Forest, the scent of blight in the air was mild and the full moon was shining through the dark green clouds.
That’s when I saw him, the handsome sin’dorei that broke my withered heart not once, nor twice, but four times… and ironically, he was skipping through a field of rotten grass while holding his ghoul’s hand.
And yet, when his eyes met mine, he released that bony hand and rushed to me, his eyes almost displaying a glint of life at the sight of me and for once, I felt hope.
For a few nights we rekindled the flame, and I fell for him once more, as if it was the first time, as if my heart was capable of beating.
But as usual, not all good dreams last forever, this time, he neglected me again, and for a geist!
My dead heart can’t take this again.
4 Likes
Kept pining for her Silverpine romance, the notorious Malochai. I decided that i had crossed sheets with one too many of his exwives, and began my crusade to eradicate him (also to liberate my children from the corn cult.)
3 Likes
I was a little hesitant getting involved with the blood elf Palatina. But she was a Paladin, worshipping the light, and i worship the light, we’re both hot, so it should work out, right? Well first there was the issue with my tail. She just couldn’t figure out how to work it into normal intimacy like a Draenei wants.
Then, the final staw was I woke up to her trying to suck the light out of me because she missed her appointment with the Sunwell. She said it would never happen again, but that was just too much. You should see her face when she’s trying to suck magic out of you! Scary stuff.
3 Likes
Always wanted to skip chest day at the gym.
1 Like