He kept trying to make light infused beer and I just got tired of having to help rebuild and/or replace the shed.
1 Like
he was too lazy to help me build a workshopā¦something about use a shed but i aint building another oneā¦
4 Likes
I caught her snorting void infested tree bark.
2 Likes
I caught him selling void infested tree bark.
6 Likes
Because I refuse to live my life under a hunterās mark labelled with āIām with idiotā, just because I wanted her menagerie to sleep in their own bedsā¦
3 Likes
Because she nicked my wardrobe! Get back to Goodie Mob, Charlatan!
1 Like
She kept lowkey insisting her hat was better than my wolf mask. So I had Snowy poop in said hat, while Kurama peed on her boots for good measure.
3 Likes
Ahā¦ My third husband. I had to let him go. The window licking I could manage. The āfree venisonā? Fine.
However, I could not look Overspark in the eyes, when he would casually drive up the house with Muggins clamped onto the poor gnomeās flying machine, screaming something about stabbing at someone from Hellās Heartā¦
Orcsā¦
2 Likes
Of all the bad ideas, two rogues marrying should absolutely be at the top of the list. Trust? Completely impossible when both of you are completely used to secrets and lies as tricks of the trade. And lets not even talk about the number of knives in the bed! I mean, 12-15 knives/daggers is understandable, but one night I counted a combined 67! There just wasnāt enough space for the both of us to have our knives there. It was doomed.
Parted amicably, no reason to garrote someone for a divorce!
6 Likes
didnt like it when i used the stabby knives as kitchen utensilsā¦and just threw them out when they got dull because there were so many of em, i figured they wouldnt be missed.
6 Likes
She didnāt like that my face made an appropriate chair while I was fully standing.
3 Likes
He was much too short where it mattered
2 Likes
When I called her out on her kleptomaniac tendencies, she declared that she was a pirate and tried to steal my wolf mask.
4 Likes
Heās worn his wolf mask for so long, it was in fact impossible to remove or steal. Which wasnāt a problem, I didnāt want to steal his maskā¦but it made smoochies impossible.
Somehow smoochies with snowy just werenāt just the sameā¦
6 Likes
She got hair all over the bed, ate the peanut butter and tackled the landlordā¦ that poor gnome.
But wouldnāt trade apple for any other panda.
6 Likes
I thought this one would be a winner. His pets were house trained. His beard was epic and his bow was long cough
Howeverā¦ All those Treasure Island puns? No me hearty Jim HawkĆ©ns has no place in this harbourage any moreā¦ Gyarr!
5 Likes
I realized we were never going to go on that sapper run we had been planning once she started talking about growing old together. I even let her pick the target and everything!
4 Likes
I met her on Hunterās Mark Dating site. We arranged to meet and go hunting BUT when she unloaded her marksman rifleā¦
I tried to convince her to go BM, itās so obvious the best spec, and she just ignored me, I realized Roxxy was never going to be my Hunters Mark, I filed for a annulment that day!
5 Likes
Startastic had the most lovely eyes; Iād never seen a blood elf with blue eyes before and she was just so full of life. The way those eyes communicated everything, I just couldnāt take my eyes off of themā¦
This was sadly the down side of our relationship, since sheād sporadically get annoyed, snap her fingers and say āmy boobs are down here!ā
4 Likes
Thatāll be the last time I ever let an orc set me up on a blind dateā¦ first off I was literally blindfolded for the entire date, so I wasnāt even aware of how they looked. I got no problem with Vulpera, infact I find them quite adorable. But when youāre figuring out someone you voice alone, nothing can be more confusing than determining the gender of a Vulpera. I thought he was a she until after the blindfold came offā¦ when I learned he was infact not a she, I called off the wedding. But apparently we were already considered married by some customā¦ so now Iām getting everything sorted out for the divorceā¦ and If youāll excuse me I have to find an orc to electrocuteā¦ againā¦
3 Likes