Hello! I am not sure if you are willing to change factions or not , but if so my guild Evolved might be a good fit for you! We are an 18+ community and most of our members have families, jobs, etc so we understand the importance of real life coming first. Because of this, we do not require 100% raid attendance. We run multiple raid groups, so plenty of room for you! Everyone is super friendly, mature, and a ton of fun to be around. 
We like to focus on having a strong community as it makes the game so much more enjoyable! We do all kinds of things besides raiding such as M+, arena, world pvp, dungeons, etc. We just like having fun together! 
We raid Tues/Fri/Sat from 9-11 pm EST with an optional hour on Fri/Saturday. Evolved is an Alliance guild on the Proudmoore server.
We do meet all 3 of the requirements you were looking for. Proudmoore is definitely a larger server, we finish our main raids by 11 pm EST(we do have an optional hour on the weekends but it really is optional and no pressure to stay), and we raid 3 nights a week.
You can read more at:
You can contact me at BNet Starlight200#1548 or Discord Star#0700 if you have more questions.
I wish you luck in the guild hunt! Finding the right group makes a huge difference!