this 100%
/10char
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My experience after doing every role is that its almost never the healer’s fault.
Its always people getting hit by avoidable things or accidentally pulling extra packs. These things aren’t exclusive to any role, but they are by far the biggest reasons people die.
Other than that, tanks pulling way too much because tanks are basically invincible… killing everyone else… then acting superior when they’re only ones who survive.
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From my perspective I would disagree. I make plenty of mistakes. Just like the dps, I sometimes stand in stuff, I miss an explosive, I am slow on a dispel, I mistime a cooldown,… There is nothing special about the healing role. We make mistakes just like anyone else. That said, healers aren’t miracle workers. We cannot carry a group to success. We can make up for some mistakes but, especially on higher keys we cannot make up many.
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My HPS is lowest with good groups, interrupts are on point, defensives are used, avoidable damage is avoided. I usually feel ownership for deaths in those groups.
When my HPS numbers go through the roof, mechanics are being ignored, interrupts are not occurring, defensives are not used. I’m carrying mistakes and at some point one too many mistakes is likely to happen.
Did people die to unavoidable damage whilst taking little to no avoidable damage? If yes, it was probably the healer’s fault.
In any other scenario? It probably wasn’t. Stop standing in bad. 
Whenever someone dies to a one shot it’s their own fault. Whenever too much is pulled for the group to deal with, that was the tank’s bad judgment call based on the party.
Whenever people die to non one shot dmg, ultimately that’s on the healer since a really strong healer can compensate for almost any amount of survivable shenanigans like most missed interrupts, raid dmg, etc. people can make the healer’s job easier, but if billy_badass69 coulve healed it, max_medicrity0596 is at fault if his group dies to it.
most of the time, if you die, it’s your own dang fault 
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Honestly depends on the key. Higher keys dps can cause a wipe/dye by not doing mechanics or standing kn bad and there is zero we can do about it. Lower keys its more the healers fault if you die/wipe.
Overall its prolly a 50/50 split between the two