I can attest to how exhausting it is to be there for someone suffering from depression. Especially if they don’t want to help themselves and any words of positivity become rephrased with a negative spin to it. It’s hard, very hard.
If you’re suffering from depression and you’re aware of how difficult you’re being, try to take comfort in knowing that they’re putting in the effort because they haven’t given up on you, not that you’re a burden.
You’re a real life hero o7
The worst part about depression is that is wears on you. It consumes your energy. And when you run out of energy, it only gets worse.
Restoring that energy is something the hardest part of fighting depression. For me and my bouts with it … music works. Animals work. My last cat? When I was feeling like I had zero energy … sometimes her reminding me that her water dish was running low was enough to restore some energy.
There’s something about animals that’s just amazing at rekindling someone’s sense of purpose, even just a bit.
My pet rats I swear could tell when I was really upset. One of them would throw an absolute fit and shake their food dish around to clang and get my attention if I was crying. Then once I picked them up they’d scurry to my shoulder and groom some of my hair. Something rats do with each other to help with stress.
Sadly not everyone has a good support system, myself included. It’s so disheartening that some people don’t believe mental illnesses are “real” diseases . . . sigh
The struggle is real, terrifying, and utterly exhausting. I would not wish it on anyone, that’s for sure. Big panda hugs to all out there fighting the good fight against mental illness in any form. While I know it’s nigh impossible some days, please know you are not alone.
Hey, I’m here by myself. Sure, I have friends and neighbors but … it feels like there’s a wall between me and them.
Doesn’t help that I have other issues besides depression. Or that I live in a place where Depression is a huge issue (Seattle).
I rely on calling my sister and mother at least once a week. If only to tell them how I’m doing. I had a cat but made mistakes last year. Had to give the cat up. I have plans to get another one, but am holding off until after I visit my sister in a few weeks.
A pet … you never really think about how much they can do for a person. Even the simple act of being reminded you need to give them food can help restore your mind. Because it makes you think about simple things, like eating and drinking.
Music does wonders as well.
And if nothing else, look into hobbies. Find something that you can share. Even if its not face to face. Intellectual hobbies can do wonders. Because the thrill of learning can help.
Self diagnosed i assume
If you think it’s exhausting just being there, you should feel how exhausting it is to have mental illness. It cycles involuntary.
It’s usually not a matter of not wanting to help ourselves. It can be a matter of that help not being good, not being available or just wanting to end the pain. Regardless there is no control in it. Spirals happen even with help. It’s called an illness for a reason.
It’s not someone trying to be difficult.
This is so true, my fur babies keep me going even in the darkest of times.
The problem with mental disorders is that they tend to feed upon each other. One problem can trigger another. And all the doctor can do is treat the symptoms and not the core problem.
That’s me. The core can’t be treated. I just have to learn how to cope with it. The symptoms, including depression, can be treated.
I dream of owning rats one day. They really are the sweetest creatures on this earth and so incredibly perceptive.
Edit: The fact that they only live a few short years is so unfair.
Take photos of them. Maybe make a blog, even if nobody reads it. Share photos of them doing silly things or just being your furry little monsters.
Simple things like this can help. And when you feel down … you can pull up the blog and maybe find some energy seeing their past antics.
I’ve owned rats. They’re very clean animals, so long as you keep their cages clean. They’re also exceptionally intelligent. And durable. My sister one time got annoyed at an adult rat and threw him probably … oh, twenty feet. I know, ouch. He bounced on the carpet, shook his head, ran around, and then ran right back to her.
“Ok, you win.” was her response.
Not that I’d ENCOURAGE you to do that. She just got extremely annoyed by him not getting the point she didn’t want to play.
And worse, usually when I’m asked it’s because the person asking feels obligated to ask, not because they actually want to hear my fears about not ever again seeing my family that lives abroad or how I’m trying to cut corners to afford rent.
You were already one of my favourite posters, no need to keep trying to impress me 
Rats are fantastic little buddies.
It’s like a quote I sometimes use and I know that it really sounds negative.
“Could be better”
But, its a habit, and its a phrase I’ve always used. But looking at the phrase … it could very well be the kind of thing someone with Depression uses to get people to simply go away.
Those with Depression use what I call “turtling up”. Where you do just enough activity to make everyone go away and leave you alone. You can fake the smile, anything, to make them leave you be.
Of course, turtling up isn’t good. It doesn’t solve anything. However, understanding the signs that you’re starting to turtle up is a great thing. Because when you see the signs … you need to find ways to leave the shell (pun fully intended).
I was talking to Ralph in particular.
I was replying to Ralph who talked about temporary blues caused by the covid quarantine.
I am well aware of the symptoms of depression.
For anyone who doesn’t understand it here is a video that’s actually useful.
Yeah…2 years is average for them and it sucks. But it does make little celebrations like their birthday mean a lot. ( Also it’s why I end up spoiling the heck out of mine when I get them )
Here’s a old video of me and my last two rats. Thor and Loki.
The last one I had … he got cancer in his jaw. He would come out every morning to see my dad and get his coffee. One day he stumbled and that’s when we noticed his cheek was all swollen.
Really broke my dad’s heart. I mean, he even had a shirt made with a rat and the rat’s name on it. Sir Henry La Dipstick (not the exact name, but the actual word is banned on the forums).
But, they’re still worth it for all the memories they’ll give you. They’re intelligent, curious and playful.