Lore expedition happening tonight 8p!!!
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*Removes his hat, tossing onto the desk that his feet are propped upon, and slowly leans back into his seat.
âWhy donât you sit and tell me a bit about yourself? You can start by introducinâ yourself so I donât have to keep callinâ ya by the name Forum Viewer.â
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Are you looking to raid? Do you dream of evenings spent swept away on an amazing adventure? What about stories that have twist and turns and leaving you in shock as theyâre concluded? Maybe you fancy yourself a cog in the war machine, destroying alliance players as they show their red nameplates? Size isnât an issue to you. Being mean, green, and short in stature is nothing but an advantage.
If you answered yes to any of those questions. If the last sentence describes you. Well, youâre in luck. Youâve just found your new guild.
Come enjoy our amazing guild. Gchat so active we make triathletes look like sloths. Events happening so often that while you read this you just missed two. Look us up in game /who flashbang exports and then whisper anyone in that list for an invite. So simple a gnome could do it.
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Role play, explosions, group content, explosions, stories, explosions, friend, and yes more explosions! All of these plus so much more await you when you join Flashbang Exports! We do boom right.
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Ever wondered what goblins do at a guild meeting?
Meeting Minutes written by Gilzleby
<A sodden, mud covered note is tacked up in the head quarters noticeboard. It still drips slightly.>
Flashbang Exports Monthly Meeting Report for March.
Slight delay as someone lets off a dancing totem⌠fire, water and angry words failed to stop the insidious device.
Meeting starts in correct Goblin chaotic manner, eventually we get all names and divisions down and have a great turnout, eventually, of fourteen people. Iâm not going to list everyone because I forget all of your names.
Item 1: Supervisorâs Reports.
- Finzi talked about some Orcâs she met in the tavern, they were friendly enough and interested in her brew but not much else of note.
- A quick run down of supervisorâs and divisions: Oily and Mek; Mercenaries. Me(Gilz) and Gadric; Spellcasters. Fizz and Finzi; Hustlers.
- Ratbasher and Gavoz assigned to Mercenaries, Pix and Wes with Spellcasters, Mortybolt in with the Hustlers.
- Mekgrim talked about taking a few members into the wilds of Volâdun. Discovered Alliance dogâs operating to deny our archeologists into their areas. Through contacts they discovered that the Alliance had set up a base of operations at Shatterstone Harbor. Mek and crew were on recon when they were attacked and beaten down, hence his absence for a bit as he recovered. He knows the target and wants to get a group together to take down their Quartermaster.
- Finzi ran into a moldy smelling goblin who tried to sell an old statuette. Creepy looking fellow Established that it wasnât Fizzle but some other mumbly-guy. Something, something doctor⌠thatâs all for the moment, will keep ears and eyes open for the guy.
- Reminder that we are after profit as we are GOBLINS. But we still got to look after our own, if you see a wounded, penniless, jobless goblin then assist them. We donât need to care about the elves and trolls and the rest but we look out for our own.
Item 2: Current Deals and Transactions.
- The opportunity for our members to share their money making schemes.
- Ratbasher is called up to tell us what he does; Thanks us all for having him. And rat bashing ainât a job, itâs a passion for him. He sees a rat, he bashes it. Flywheel wants to see a 50% increase of zero profit⌠thatâs doable I reckon.
- Pix, chef extraordinaire is called up to tell us about her dishes; Her name is Pix, cooks food from Pandaria and recently expanded into Zandalari dishes. Cooks foods to make you smarter or stronger. Then went into details of ingredients. Rats were suggested as an ingredient, thatâs when I started feeling a little unwell. Everyone dug into some of Pixâs dishes⌠yummy!!
- One more report from Walkan; Heâs in the shipping business, running supplies to the front lines. Legit and legal, naturally, hearts honour and all that⌠we believe him⌠of course we do. War supplies, food, drinks, tools nothing too dangerous. His profits are Yuuuge!!!
Item 3: Employee of the Month.
- Fly has some postal votes. But wants to know if anyone has been super generous and needs a nomination. Walkan nominates Rhexxa, she REALLY understands that he is Walkan here! Rhexxa votes for Mek, Fintox voted for Cashflow⌠I agree. Morty, Fintox, Vyzlee⌠all the names get thrown out into the ring. Zinbo even. And the winner is Rhexxa with three votes!!! Rhexxa thanks all those who voted for her, âYouâre all out there working hard to make money for the greater good of ourselves.â Great words to live by. And she got a present, an underwater sea-horse thing⌠hmmm⌠that could sell well⌠or taste better!
Item 4: Upcoming eventsâŚ
- The Gizleton Grand Prix in Desolace! Special meeting next week to discuss the details.
- Lore expeditions to Ratchett have gone well. Made some coin in the form of jewels⌠nice one! The next one will be in April⌠somewhere unknown.
- Mortybolt has something that he could produce and sell. Heâs a skilled alchemist heâs seen wounded soldiers AND GOBLINS! People hate taking potions and tonics but he has his new and improved Rejuvi Sticks⢠that can help almost all illnesses and wound regenerations. He then got Rhexxa to stab him, spitting up blood he thought Rhexxa was a bit enthusiastic. He took a drag of his stick thing and the wound seemed to close and heal⌠not too bad. Rhexxa wanted to try again⌠Morty was not so keen. Impressed, Fly ordered six crates for the next Guild Expo.
- Fintoxâs mount runs have not met with great results but heâs got a few more projects up his sleeve. But not much to talk about yet.
- Then, as usual, the meeting degenerated into insanity⌠good to see we are consistent.
Item 5: Other Business.
- Iâve already said that we degenerated into insanity. Therefore, ergo, no other business!
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Yeah, that dance totem sure did send us into chaos right at the beginning of our meeting. The different reactions were hilarious!
So I heard those Zandalari finally joined the horde today. Ya know, all official and stuff. New horde members mean new customers, and that means more moolah! Weâre gonna be swimming in gold!!
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So you came here looking to bring your fancy new Zandalari into the greatest guild ever? Well bub, I got bad news for ya. See, we have a height restriction and youâre definitely over the limit. Now ya could join our companion guild, Flashbang Associates, but youâd be missing out on all the goblin hijinks. My suggestion, you do you, be a true greedy, self loving goblin and enter Flashbang Exports. The choice is yours.
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Saturday night. You wanna know what Iâm doing? Well Iâm going be hanging out with my doll over at the Pleasure Palace. Let the good times roll!
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Are you looking for a realm first raid guild? Do you enjoy premade battleground teams that deliver win after win? Would you like to be surrounded by the top echelon of PVE/PVP players in the game? Well then, this is not the guild for you.
If you enjoy hanging out with laid back, hilarious, and the occasional socially awkward person. If you like role play stories, guild dungeon runs, laid back raiding and battlegrounds, and little green people well then we have a home for you. Hit us up and get back to enjoying this game the way it was meant to be!
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Still room for more goblin role players, raiders, and inventors.
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Mekgrim is the hardest working goblin I know. Thank goodness we donât all have to follow his example.
sits back, lounging on a fluffy cushion, sipping tropical pineapple punch
Ah, nothing rivals the goblin life!
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Introducing, and for a limited time only, free shipping on guild invites for all races. Hit up a member now for your immediate invite.
Alright, times up for you non-superior races. Great news for you goblins out there. Iâm extending free shipping on your guild invites! Act now while supplies last!!
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Drat! I missed the window of opportunity.
/drowns sorrow in endless tankards of EK Ale
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Darville, maybe you can catch the next one? You could just go goblin. 30% off character services still. 100% of the funds goes directly to the goblin cartel.
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This weekend, on Saturday at 8pm server time, Flashbang Exports is hosting a goblin fishing tournament in Tanaris.
One of the first lessons for any goblin deported from Kezan knows that the key to survival is to exploit your resources! Here, we plot the best against the best! Fishermen and ladies, that is.
Join up today and show us your amazing skills to win a rare pet!
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Flashbang Exports has just unlocked the cooking recipe âSeafood Magnifique Feastâ from LOTS of fishing! Kind of appropriate, donât you think?
We also have the Broiled Dragon Feast recipe available, and many other guild perks that our incredibly hardworking team has unlocked!
We would LOVE someone that doesnât mind crafting a few gems for us, and a scribe would be treasured too.
Join a guild that doesnât just sit around! Roll a goblin today and do more FUN stuff!
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Big thank you to Flywheel for creating and hosting tonightâs Fishing Tournament! Who doesnât like a gang of goblins drinking, fishing, joking, and winning some serious macaroons?!
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Hereâs a screenshot from the Tanaris Fishing Contest - held on the docks just east of Gadgetzan. This is mid-competition, with lines and lures in full action! Mekgrim arrived just as we were handing out prizes.
https://i.imgur.com/SYVFRtp.png
Also, our next guild RP event will be a goblin lore expedition to Azshara Rocketway Exchange, which will be on Sat 6th April at 8pm server. All goblins and non-goblin friends welcome! More updates on a separate thread.
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You know whatâs better than a lore expedition? Obviously itâs one hosted by a goblin! Canât wait for this next installment!
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