Dear Blizz: please merge WRA n MG


#207

Calling out people can open up a can of worms. It is too easy for innocents to be framed by someone who gets some buddies together and gang up on them because they don’t like the guy.

That is why Moon Guard goes by a “If you do not like the person /ignore and move on” policy.


(Raithioss) #208

i actually hate that policy, for literally the example meli gave. she hates me for crapt :

  1. I dont even remember due to amnesia
  2. me just being the gm and trying to solve a issue
    3.now ex guildes who i booted because of her mistreatment, ironically she’s friends with 1 of those ppl XD

(Idun) #209

Both have large populations. There’s no reason to merge them.


(Zandrae) #210

While this sometimes happens it’s pretty rare. Speaking out alone is a great risk of more harassment. It’s easier to flee faction/server.

There is also more nuanced abuses that might not seem obvious.

Example

I’ve had one of these types harassing me for half a decade. Every now and then she rears er ugly head and causes grief.

I was part of a non guild RP group, the leader swore it would be a space free of harassment. The abuser showed up, and while leader knew that she had a history he let her stay. I knew even if I had her on ignore she would try and take anything I might say IC out of context use it for harassment. So I had no choice but to leave and abandon all my friends. I did so without any outburst or dramatics because that wouldn’t help, it would make me look bad and let her play the victim.

One person, my RP partner, went with me. No one else cared or asked why I’d departed.

Leader continually tried to pull my RP partner back into the group where she’d come across my abuser, who had already tried to poison the well with the RP partner. Sometimes she’d go and I’d be left alone with no one to talk to for hours. Brain weasels ran wild, I worried that prolonged contact would eventually make RP partner believe the lies and rubbish.

I found myself in a catch 22, tell my best friend that I don’t like her playing near the abuser, or sit and watch my only friend slip away, powerless. I knew my RP partner was an adult capable of making her own decisions and try to tell her what she can and cannot do is abusive and makes me a bad friend unworthy of her friendship. At the same time, I was still uncomfortable. I thought myself a terrible and unworthy person. I fell into a severe depression and had repeated intrusive thoughts of self harm. I wound up spending hours sobbing to my therapist and psychiatrist about stupid online drama. I doubted my sanity.

My therapist identified it as gaslighting and triangulation. It wasn’t clear if leader was doing it for the abuser or not but my brain weasels were associating it with previous harassment. Basically leader was pulling my friend away intentionally or not, making me doubt my sanity and isolating me.

That didn’t solve the problem. I wrote a dear John letter to my RP partner. At the last minute I told her about the gaslighting and triangulation instead of breaking it off. By unfortunate chance, she is like me: An adult child of a narcissistic parent and she saw it too when I pointed it out. Most people would not have been so lucky. We’re still best friends today and I just got back from visiting her IRL earlier this week.

She sat down and ran both myself and Leafer’s group through the Advanced Bonewits Cult Danger Evaluation Frame. I scored 1 out of 100 due to my desire to avoid abuser and keep our RP separate. They scored much much higher, a low key cult of personality. We both went largely no contact with the group.

The idea of someone like that having server-wide acceptance as an authority is terrifying to me. No. No way.


(Raithioss) #211

but how many ppl actually have that? every interaction/person i know has a equal person against them.


#212

Did not understand due to misspelling but that sounds more like you kicked her and 3 of her friends because they mistreated other members. We have no issues with guilds policing themselves.

It is when a persons calls out another person publicly to turn that person’s server/guild against them when issues arise.


#213

That is the kind of person this policy will avoid as if this person would try to slander you and you were both on MG they would kindly be told “If you do not like him /ignore and move on.”


(Raithioss) #214

actually no. I didnt even kick her, 1 of my officers did and when i tried talking to her i got nothing. the officer tht did kick her was close friends with one of her now close friends and even told this officer to boot her.
i get the shortend because i’m the gm and tried to calm things down but sadly a night i was gone she got booted.


#215

Sorry but again Like I said MG has NO issue with guilds policing themselves.


#216

Yes. Basically. People complain about MG, guess what folks, I play on other servers and it happens there too. MG gets visitors from OTHER servers that roll there just to experience the memes for themselves. They probably never bothered to check their own servers. Hey, but it’s cool man, come roll on MG and keep that population nice and healthy. :wink:


(Zandrae) #217

I’ve run into about a dozen of the flavor of person I gave an example of on WRA. There’s probably more I haven’t spotted yet. They tend to be guild leaders/non guild group leaders. Usually too nice to be true and extremely popular with a large friend group.

I’ve seen them in positions of mass influence before, where entire communities grew to depend on them for RP as they isolated and alienated competition. When they chased the wrong people off the game they did get called out and ran to the other faction where they’re repeating the cycle. RP in this scene died in their wake and has never quite recovered because they isolated and targeted other movers and shakers. If they returned today they would be welcomed and their leadership would be seen as a golden age, their tomfoolery largely forgotten.

I published a 15 page (single space 12 point times new roman) pseudo-academic research paper on my blog about NPD as it manifests in online RP communities. It details red flags, methods of manipulation, cycles of abuse, etc. It helped others come to terms with and understand their own experiences.


(Raithioss) #218

not gonna lie…kinda want to read tht now to see ur opinion >.>


(Zandrae) #219

Google, with quotes included, "narcissistic personality disorder in online roleplay". It should be the second link though the first is a reblog. (The Peacock King is my blog title.)

I showed it to folks who sponsor low income folks for masters/doctorate degree programs as a writing sample. I may wind up getting a master’s degree in social psychology.


(Amine) #220

Then there is no problem. OP was the one who says it was dwindling - that actually was the first I heard of it.


(Shadina) #221

OP is Horde on MG. For him, there is no RP because much like other heavily populated servers with just one side experiencing content, MG H RP isn’t very social, or openly networked. It’s very heavily gated behind guilds. Threads over on the MG Forums have been trying to get the word out that Horde needs to be more openly social and less reliant on guilds, but that’s on him for not checking those out and being more careful with where he chose to settle. All in all, this thread isn’t really needed.


(Amine) #222

According to this 1/3 of the server population is horde and 100k players is more than a lot of smaller servers have.

https://realmpop.com/us-moon-guard.html


(Daiklave) #223

Is there even a single good reason why you would merge Moon Guard and WrA?


(Shaldoris) #224

(Raithioss) #226

Kinda confusing, you get the point that I’m MG horde yet miss the point that I’m trying to get the horde side of rp back on its feet for open rp.

I check the server forum,am part of all the server discords , and am in the communities.

Planned events are not the issue but the lack of walk ups and active cities.


(Shadina) #227

Right. I said this earlier. But what you’re describing is a player created issue. There is no lack of Horde side RP on WRA. There is a lack of Horde side RP because players chose that Hordeside RP would be better on WRA, and Alliance players laid claim to MG. It’s always been this way.