Thank you.
I think my problem is that I perceive you guys as ignoring the flaws with Starcraft and being irrationally angry when told flaws may exist. Am I seeing what isn’t there?
If you guys all said “sure the story is bad, so we ignore it and enjoy the game anyway” then I might not have gone down this dark path years ago. I find it much easier to talk with the WarCraft community since everybody acknowledges the story is broken and they have to turn their brains off to stay sane.
My feelings have been shredded for a while, but thank you for thinking of me. I’m touched.
A combination of things.
- The American Civil War recycled in space, at least until it was trashed.
- The protoss being a combination of the Eldar and Imperium from 40k and the Federation from Star Trek, at least until they became irrelevant wimps.
- The zerg, at least until Overmind died. They’re tyranids with personality, which makes them unique in all of scifi lit (aside from the Necrophages in Endless Legend), but no writer has used them effectively. Everyone who tried gave up. Blizz turned them into Kerry’s slaves. Gradius abandoned his Origins campaign.
I’ve tried writing an original universe many times and I constantly find myself copying these ideas, as well as plenty of other details from the manual lore and the alpha/beta lore. I like the concepts but feel Blizzard screwed the pooch in their execution.
It doesn’t help that I’m the only person in the universe interested in exploring these concepts. Whenever I try to start group brainstorm sessions nobody is interested or somebody actively tells me off.
This isn’t the only forum I visit. I’ve been ignored or browbeaten for years everywhere I went. It’s exhausting and soul-crushing.
While undiagnosed, I’m almost certainly clinically depressed. I’ve made suicide threats multiple times the years I’ve been browbeaten when pursuing this line of inquiry. One of these days I might actually do it.
I was hit by a car once. Seeing that screaming metal death trap hurtling toward me is the most terrifying moment in my life. In the moments afterward, before people noticed and called paramedics, I was completely stunned, paralyzed, barely conscious from the concussion, and for a moment I thought I was dead. In lying on the road like a corpse, I felt oddly relieved. I felt like all my cares in the world had suddenly vanished, like I was a newborn looking at the world for the first time. Then the shock wore off and I came crashing back to harsh, agonizing reality. The pain from my broken bones was excruciating. It was a miracle I wasn’t left crippled for life.
Dying doesn’t seem so bad anymore, aside from your loved ones mourning you. Suffering in life is what scares me.
I’m sorry for being a complete a-hole about Starcraft too. I’m frustrated that there’s no fandom for starcraft but with better writing. My host of mental issues make it difficult for me to engage with others.
