– Tell me one thing. All those facts and figures I saw of your life, you were never alone. All those bright and shining companions. But not any more?
– No.
– Might I ask why not?
– They leave. Because they should or because they find someone else. And some of them, some of them… forget me.
– I suppose in the end, they break my heart.
I don’t have “social anxiety”. I just don’t want to socialise beyond the necessary when I don’t want to. It’s that simple. But if you’re with a group of people, socialising will still be outside of game actions
It sounds like the opposite of social anxiety is the problem here, tbh
How many stacks do you come across that have a positive mood, trying to win, not flaming each other and all are comming? It’s extremely rare in my servers. Like hitting a goldmine when that happens. Maybe 1 in 30 games.
Most of the times solo queue in my servers is just either quiet, or 1-2 guys making comms. And more likely than not to turn into a flame war when something goes wrong. That’s why forming your own stack of good people for those great games with great banter is more effective.
Maybe you specifically don’t. But a lot of people do, and for those people it’s holding them back from finding great people to stack with for epicly fun games on a regular basis.
What you quoted there didn’t have anything to do with the social anxiety. It’s what overcoming social anxiety can bring to people on a regular basis, when you find the right people to befriend and group with.
The dopamine hits are significantly greater with the right group of people. Gaming is all about dopamine. A game that provides no dopamine is not a good game, and finding ways to increase the dopamine enhances the gameplay experience.
But. To each their own. I was a solo queuer for years and found good people to stack with. Completely revitalized this game for me. Maybe it will for someone else here if they try.
It’s a possible, but real solution to the problem. Can suffer the solo queue and complain until something may or may not change in the years to follow.
Or the player can do something about that problem and fill in the slots on your team with competent players who communicate. It also helps with the bad matchmaking problem. It solves/helps lessen multiple problems at once.
Everyone picked up on my one line of ‘overcome social anxiety’ and that seemed to trigger a few people. Or a lot people.
Maybe I’m a lot more positive than the forums give me credit for because I’ve been damn good at defusing toxicity and keeping positivity in coms whenever I have been playing.
Biggest problem I have is people being creeps and trying to sexualise my voice.
Yeah Perthian here. Wow 70% of your solo queue games has great banter and decent people? Holy. I wish I had that experience. It’s crickets most of the time for me. Or when there’s comms it’s a callout here and there and nothing else, and that’s still rare. It’s common for the ‘callouts’ that do happen to be triggering insults and blames.
Are you high rank? I’d imagine there’s a lot more comms in high rank.
Edit: Woops I totally misread that part. 1 in 7 not 7 in 10. With a 5 stack, or even a 3 stack that can be 1 in 1 games though.
That’s far from a solution. That’s a workaround, which shouldn’t really be necessary. Some don’t like to add strangers to their friends list, some like to play solo. You’re just white knighting for the devs right here after they gave their excuse as to why we have 3 slots per 7 days to avoid people.
Other games with smaller player bases have done it properly, so why can’t Blizzard do it with OW?
People want to avoid toxic, racist etc players for a reason. If they’re toxic etc or intentionally throwing the game then, damn right they should be avoided until they quit playing. However, avoided in this game only mean they won’t be matched to my team after i’ve avoided them. They can still be matched on the enemy team against me, but at least i won’t have them in my team chat being toxic or they won’t be on my team throwing the game.
You’re mistaking courage for necessity. If there’s something you need, you have to, like with grocery shopping, you have to do it because you have to eat in order to survive.
Don’t mix real life with a game, it’s just not a very good comparison.
Anxiety comes in many, many different ways and levels of intensity. Not a single human being is the same when it comes to anxiety.
Anxiety isn’t something you just have, it’s something you gain through trauma.
I really don’t think you’ve got anxiety with the way you’re talking about it and how people can easily deal with it.
It does, though. Whoever told you that, were lying.
You what now?
No, that’s just nonsense. Nobody with actual anxiety are able to do that. When it comes to facing your fears, that works for phobias, but anxiety and phobia are two completely different things, each requiring different approaches, and phobias uses the face your fear approach to deal with x phobia. It doens’t work with anxiety unless you’re heavily medicated.
Again, not how anxiety works. You can’t simply counter anxiety by ‘facing your fears’.
Panic attacks are not solely related to anxiety mind you. They’re also related to phobias and about 35-40% of all people experience panic attacks at some point in life, most not even triggered by anxiety.
While i don’t agree with the remainder of a season, i agree with the rest.
We shouldn’t be forced to have the same toxic player joining our team multiple times per day while our avoid list is full after just 1hr of playing the game.
We’re met with a choice of trading one toxic player for another toxic player on that list and it’s just a horrible way of doing it.
The best way would be to increase the avoid slots to 100, because during one week, that’s literally the amount of toxic players i encounter and want to avoid. I don’t mind the 7 days, but for crying out loud i want to be able to avoid at least 100 for a week.
Make the avoid list 3 for people in GM-t500 since there’s less people playing up there, but for the low elos, they really do need to increase it to at least 100 per 7 days.
Like you mentioned, it would also be a good idea to have the avoided players join other avoided players and let them waste their time insulting each other instead.
We’ve had a misconception. 1 in 7ish games has amazing banter. I get decent games with alright conversations about half the time though.
A fair bit of it is that I am a very positive player in vc. How I act on the forums does not correlate to me when actually playing.
An uncomfortable amount of games is ruined because people are too interested in my pants. Not the most positive experience.
Masters. But I had a similar experience in diamond and plat. Not as good, but definitely still fine in diamond and plat. There’s a reason I’m unhappy about the whole Life Grip addition getting me to quit.
I… Have a very nice voice. I’m not far of off CorpseHusband, a bit higher (about half an octave up). The best I can describe it is Markiplier but deeper and aussie.
Makes it very nice to do impressions. Really enjoyed Friday the Thirteenth I think it was with friends.
Makes it not so nice when people decide to be pervs about it.
There is some kind of alternative you can try:
You can block everyone you don’t like. Afaik that’s permanent. Then check at the start of the game if you blocked them and decide if you want to play that game.
This is what works well for me. Things trigger anxiety, the longer I avoid those triggers, the worse the anxiety gets when a trigger occurs. If I force myself into the situations that are small, like talking to someone, sending a friend request etc. The more I am used to it. The smaller and more manageable the ‘event’. I constantly reassure myself that those things are fine and okay, and easy. And it’s extremely relieving to do so afterward.
Like extreme elimination diets. I.e. Most lactose intolerant persons can eat tiny amounts of dairy and be fine. But if they completely stop all dairy for extended periods, then have one sip of milk that’s a punch to the gut and 2 hours on the toilet. (I also have experience with this). If I avoid all triggers completely, I’m hecked when a trigger occurs, even the small ones.
For a long while I had my groceries delivered. I was a recluse because of fear of any and all triggers. That was a massive downward spiral into madness and enhanced anxiety. Went to a grocery store in peak hour and was an absolute mess thinking I had a heart attack. But, go to the grocery store in non peak hours. Then gradually over time go closer and closer to peak, I can now go in peak hours albeit with anxiety, but not with a heart attack.
When I force myself to do things that are smaller ‘triggers’, the less of a trigger they become. Although still triggers, much much more manageable.
Ah okay fair enough. I’m Plat in support/dps and that’s very rare for me. Compared to my recent games in a 5 stack of people, where every good play is validated instantly in voice with excitement, and every bad play receives a ‘ah that’s okay I stuffed up too’ or something along the lines. There’s just less pressure I feel, and more reward.
No, that is not a stretch, but a fact. You wager it’d work for many, but the fact is that anxiety and the levels of anxiety is unique to each individual, hence what works for you will, as i said, in most cases not work for everyone else.
Since a company lied to its playerbase for two years promising ‘PVE’ and delivering a game which didn’t have it, waited over 6 months to tell the playerbase that PVE would not be coming and then adding back in features that were removed and writing it like they were new things ‘on fire’ and other things like that.
So objectively the matchmaking is bad, it produces terrible games and I’m not going to offer solutions, it isn’t my job. They get paid for it and they need to do better.
Yeah… 2 more avoid slots ( or maybe option to not see 1-3 picked people against you?) + find group option + being able to see stacks if you TAB would be great
