The Lich King sits on the Frozen throne, tapping his foot. He picks up a Hearthstone and holds it in his hand. “Call Rafaam.” He says. The stone glows and hums for a few seconds. Eventually the stone flashes and Rafaam’s velvety voice comes through.
“This is Rafaam, SUPREME ARCHEOLOGIST! Please leave a message after the cackle. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“Hey, Rafaam! It’s, uh, The Lich King again. You know, Evil Lord of the Scourge. Still haven’t heard back on my application for your League of E.V.I.L thing. Sent it over to you through the mail. Maybe you haven’t checked the mailbox. Or maybe you did and got distracted by the elves! Ha ha! That-that’s a joke. Uhh…Just wondering if I’ve been accepted. I’m totally available. Not many people running ICC, so I’ve got free time. Travel isn’t an issue, either. I can do the whole Death Gate thing so, ha ha, you know, “Don’t need a Summon to the fight”! Ah ha haaaa…Look, if this is about Kel’thuzad, we don’t have to bring him. I’m totally cool with leaving him out of this thing. We’re not a package deal. We don’t even follow each other on social media, so he’ll never know. Unless you already got him and he told you to leave me out, which is totally crazy. You need a guy like me! I can raise zombies! You like zombies, right? I mean, you’re a mummy, that’s like your cousin, right? No, no wait, you’re not cousins, I know Ethereals aren’t undead. I am so sorry. That sounded racist. I’m not racist. Some of my servants are Orcs and Humans. I’m like the least racist evil leader. I’m sorry. Look, just…ya know, give me a holler, I’ll be here. This is The Lich King. Again. Totally available. All day. And night. So, uhhhh…keep cool! Get it? Cool? Because I’m the Lich King? And I’m cold? Because I sit on the Frozen Throne? Alright. Bye.”