Battle.net will not load at all

So, I haven’t used the Blizzard app in a while (I’ve been playing games on my Steam account), and I loaded it up tonight.
Two things happened immediately. 1) The app tried to load, and crashed, bringing all processes on my computer to a grinding halt (I was watching a Youtube video, which is not a new combination for my machine), and 2) I lost the ability to use any of Windows Explorer’s capabilities, including bringing up any kind of right-click menu.
I had to reboot my PC via the reboot button on the front, and when I got back to Windows again, I once more tried to load the app. It requested my login information, which I provided, and proceeded to search for Blizzard games on my PC (I have Diablo 3 and Starcraft 2, at the very least, installed on my PC currently). Once more, program crash and a forced reboot. 3rd attempt, I left it alone to process this search for programs. It stayed in a ‘searching’ state for 3 minutes, with the (Not Responding) tag showing up more than once, and then closes out. 3 more attempts, same results. I can’t uninstall the launcher to reinstall it, not even through the control panel, and I can’t get far enough into it to try to repair it.

Any suggestions?